Everyone has a book inside them..

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After yesterdays wobble I wondered if today would be as daunting, I am thrilled to say that it wasn’t at all! Today proved to me why I am at university in the first place. I had a 2 hour lecture today and I learnt so much that I think it’s safe to say I don’t care how much I’m paying because of what I am learning. One of my lecturers, Meg, is so incredible. I actually met her last week at the Chancellor’s inauguration but had no idea she would be teaching me. We looked at words and how powerful they can be, we specifically looked at speeches and once again the glory that is Martin Luther King’s ‘I have a dream’ speech was put under scrutiny (in a good way I can assure you). That speech inspired me as much as the lecture, his passion, his hopes makes my skin burst into goose bumps every single time I hear it. There was so much to learn and do today and that was only after one 2 hour lecture! 

I won’t lie to you I had another wobble after I got home and tried to work out how I was going to get all my homework done. After all the panic and confusing Bekkie and I were still a little confused so we turned to our intranet. It turns out I had downloaded the wrong file (yup and I go into uni!) so that’s why I couldn’t find the right lecture notes. Brilliant. We’re fine now, we had a laugh any bonded over Harry Potter..as you do. This is only a quick blog tonight just to let you know I’m doing okay and I’m getting there. I’m even thinking of writing a freshers guide when I leave depending on how this blog pans out. I WILL not be writing a cliché about how you have to be friends with everyone. The truth of the matter? You don’t, just don’t cause fights. There are already one or two people here who piss me off every time I see them, I’m fairly aware they know I’m not interested in them, we just stay out of each others way. Simple. 

So keep your eyes peeled in the future for a book on uni life! haha! 

 

Thanks for reading 

Chloe 🙂 

Sleep and the young Fresher (nature special)

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In the wilderness that is university, throughout the day young freshers sleep. At night we see them come alive in a variety of ways socialising, becoming aware of their surroundings and of course the famous mating call (often associated with the alcoholic beverage of their choice. Ok so you know I’m not any kind of a nature specialist here I’m simply commenting on student life, however it has come to my attention that the majority of students just don’t seem to sleep. I think I’m a rarity,there is nothing I love more than my food and my bed (while also being lucky enough to stay a size 8 mwhaha!!)  while everyone else is just going crazy! I have to admit though now freshers is over people are generally starting to calm down a bit, there are still flat parties but it’s relaxed a little bit. As for my nights out? I’m still waiting for a mad night out, if I’m honest though I want to get to know where I am before hand although Wednesday nights seem to be a good night to go out so maybe I’ll try that next week! 

As I said I’m a bit of a rarity but despite this I haven’t been sleeping. It’s hard to get used to a new place as well as listening to the other crazy freshers outside my window all hours of the night. The solution I thought? Go stay at Ali’s and get some sleep after all Kingston Hill seems to be calmer. So after trying and failing with even more buses (damn I hate the buses!) Ali’s friends are pretty chilled out and we all decided to give the pub a miss and instead just sit and talk, the rest of Kingston Hill didn’t seem to get the message. I’m starting to get the feeling that even though I don’t go to them flat parties follow me, I never sleep!  I asked Ali about the amount of noise (honestly it was like trying to sleep in a bar!) and he said he didn’t get it, it was never that bad. Eventually I managed to crash out then woke up about 6 hours later to get the bus, this was strike one. Despite the early start I woke up with a smile and headed off to wait for my new laptop and printer to arrive. When it did the guy pretty much made me trash my neatly and thoroughly organised desk and room which sent me into a whole different wave of panic. I had a new laptop though, I can’t complain about that although my idea for a quick shower and 1 hour nap went out the window, I surely wouldn’t be THAT tired right? Wrong. After almost 2 weeks of interrupted sleep the tiredness reared its ugly head. The problem is when I’m tired I easily slip into a low (as I had the night before), to cut a long story short I doubted myself all afternoon and ended up in tears (which my lecturer is now aware of, nice one Chloe, nice one) at the end of one lecture. The thing is getting used to all this on a few hours sleep is enough to make anyone’s brain hurt let alone someone like me who has a brain running at 100mph at all times. 

I lost all faith in myself today so I have decided that sleep is so important that I don’t care what people think of me. I need to stay healthy so I’m going to go out occasionally but make sure I get a good nights sleep most nights. I need to make sure that I’m okay because otherwise I wont get my degree and that’s what I’m here to do. I want to use this blog also to thank my lovely new friends as well as some old ones. I’ve been having a really tough time time this week and I’ve found freshers hard and a few people have really made all the difference. So I’m using this to say thank you and that I’m okay, well I will be in time. As a lovely man said to me today ‘take every day at a time’. 

10 Ways to Survive Freshers Week!

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1. Say Hi to all your flatmates! 

This really is a must, you’re going to live with these people all year, like it or lump it. I was lucky and got really nice flat mates (even a nice girl on my course!), if you guys arn’t  that alike remember they on’t have to be your best friends you just have to get on.

2. Go to your induction lectures 

I had 3 9am starts down on my timetable which I was DREADING but after attending one the rest of my 9am lectures were cancelled. Also they give you good tips in these as well as important info, we even got our first task in one lecture. On top of that you get to meet your course mates and lecturers, in a way these are even more important than your flat mates these people will see you for 3 years (first impressions count). 

3. Cry when you need it 

So you’re in a new town/city, a new room and you’ve just spent £9000 on fees I think your entitled to a good cry. Almost everyone I have spoken to has had a break down at one point or another, so don’t bottle it up! I always found that after I made my self go and do something so that I wasn’t wallowing.

4. Phone or Go Home when YOU need it 

So if you’re like me you will more than likely get quite homesick, here’s a secret, you’re allowed to phone home! After talking to other people I know that most of us are phoning home most days (every day in my case) and a few people have had to go home for varied reasons. It’s not the best idea to go back every weekend if you can help it because you do need to make friends but I know a few people at my uni who have done freshers and gone home for the weekend. It’s all up to you and how you feel. 

5. Don’t buy everything on the booklist, ask what you NEED. 

Ask any second or third year they will say the same thing only buy the CORE textbooks. I study English and we read a new book a week for one module (as you can guess that is impossible to budget for) but we get the resources online to read which is helpful. Even our lecturers have said that you don’t need to buy absolutely everything, talk to people about what you really need.

6. Don’t feel pressured into going out every night 

I went out drinking twice in freshers week and that was definitely enough. There is a big pressure to go out and be wild every night, coming from some of my friends who did it, it’s boring. The problem with freshers is that absolutely everyone thinks they need to be out every night meaning the clubs and bars are rammed. If, like me, you are not that into the club scene then just do something else until it calms down. go to a few flat parties for an hour or two and show your face then go do something else you don’t need to be wasted to be a good fresher! 

7. Learn who you are

This kind of ties in with what I said above, learn who you are and what you want to do. If you don’t want to do something then say no! It’s all up to you now, try and be comfortable in your own skin (I know how hard this can be trust me).

8. Get to know where you live! 

Take the wrong bus, walk the wrong way all these little mishaps allow you to get to know where you live and where things are! 

9.Don’t spend your Student Loan in the first week

I thought it was obvious but apparently not. I know people who went full out shopping the day the loan came in…let’s see how tasty those shoes are at Christmas…

10. Enjoy yourself! 

It’s stressful and new and scary but once that bit calms down have fun learning about yourself 🙂 

We may be home early and sober but we have had a bloody good time!

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Beckiie and I ready for the Ball

Compared with how the evening turned out this morning was terrible,  I woke up still tired with a huge tummy ache. Not good. Then I found out that a certain online retailed had charged me for a service I didn’t want and my budget was low as hell after a few phone calls Beckiie and I were finally headed to the freshers fayre again! This time thankfully it was a lot less busy as we got there at an earlier time and I had learnt to lie to people if they wanted to harass you! We wondered around and got 2 lots of popcorn as well as 5 or 6 bags of goodies (we could have gotten more if we thought to sign up with a fake name as some people did, a tip for next year!)  before settling down and giving Ali a call. While we waited we looked through our bags and thought about how the day had been so far and we came to the conclusion that the Christian stands were the most pushy (apart from maths). This didn’t come as much of a shock in general but in comparison with the other religions it was quite shocking. Now Kingston is very diverse and one of the reasons I adore the place there were almost all religions there but Christians trumped them, they tried to talk us into meeting without really explaining about their faith and constantly bugged us unfortunately. I wouldn’t have minded if they were honest but a fair few representatives weren’t and that was a real shame. We visited a lot of stands and had a breather between them. After a while Ali came and as usual he got on with what he wanted to do then made his was away…which meant it was birthday present time for me. A whole afternoon with a certain budget and I could get whatever I liked! Unfortunately we didn’t find much so the conclusion was I would get my present at the Paramore concert next Friday…that was until we found an incredible chocolate shop called Montezuma’s. Ali knows me so well he got me what is called a ‘chocolate library’ combining two of my passions, chocolate and books (ok not real books but it was a good idea). 

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My Chocolate Library! Yum Yum! 

After surviving freshers it was time to head home for the ball and so we waited for the bus, then we waited again…then we waited some more. It got there eventually. When we got back I started feeling tired and low and after a long cry down the phone to Ali and my Mum I started to feel better and got ready for the ball. I really didn’t know if I wanted to do a night out but I’d already paid for the ticket so I agreed.  Although we weren’t drinking much and it wasn’t our kind of music we had an amazing time (Ali didn’t come but myself, Beckiie, Joe and Conor had a laugh). We ended up in the Student Union for most of the night before attempting to catch the bus home (which in the end was cancelled so we had to get a cab). It just proved my point that you don’t have to get wasted to have a good night. Don’t get me wrong I like a few drinks sometimes but being wasted is horrible and after the last time I really don’t want to be there again plus it is SO much cheaper (especially if you are a lightweight 😉 ) 

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Beckiie, Me, Joe and Conor (behind) 

 

So that’s it for the day and a pretty successful one at that. I am SO looking forward to sleeping over the weekend! 

 

Thanks for reading! 

 

Chloe 🙂 

Ups and Downs

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How I entertain myself and Ali on my bus journeys (that’s my tongue not my bottom lip)

 

Today the inevitable happened, tired, full of cold and stressed out I finally hit a low. I know it’s been coming it’s like a storm you can feel coming and I was silly enough to have thought it had gone away. I had a dip the other night with Ali but I put that down to drinking too much (never.again.) today was different. I was up and ready (after my hot water wasn’t working, that was strike one), today was freshers fair! I’d heard so much about it and honestly, it didn’t live up to the hype. Many of my other freshers have said the same thing too many people in one small place. I couldn’t breath and I could hardly move at all which made me feel awful as well as some slightly pushy 2nd and 3rd years being around. I signed up for a few of the societies that I really wanted to Music, Rock and Journalism, I’m planning to pop back early tomorrow to try and see if there is anything else I want to join in with. The thing is I don’t want to sign up for to much and regret it later so I’m just sticking with my 3 and may spend some time with the student’s union. With all the chaos I just felt lost and alone and needed to cry. I panicked and I felt like I wanted to go home (perfectly normal freshers feelings) then started to go on a low. As with many other times I tried to relax and ended up falling asleep during a visit to Ali’s this afternoon and I woke up feeling much better.

After a low I try and think about it and work out why but do you know what? Sometimes there isn’t a reason, it’s just part of a really crappy illness that I have. No one knows if I’ll get rid of it for good, it could go away for years and come back but I try not to think about that. The anxiety is the same thing but in my heart I think I’ll always be a little bit anxious. I am accepting it and I want to leave university after changing people’s perceptions on mental health issues that we’re not all ‘nutters’. Unfortunately due to my low mood I couldn’t face the disability meeting which really upset me  because normally I try and work around it and I do but I suppose I have to accept that a lot is changing and moving. Things will be worse at the moment and I hoping I can move on but I do hate it and I can’t always be positive, it’s just the way things are. I did get around it though with a trip to Kingston Hill, a nice shower, some home cooked food (thanks for the frozen meals mum!) and a lovely night in with Becky. Overall tonight has been a good end to a particularly rough day. Here’s hoping tomorrow is ok! 

Do I look like a Kingston Uni student to you?

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Today was my first day in Kingston and I have officially enrolled as a university student. As I write this I have an ID card in my bag and I’m wearing a lovely red Kingston hoodie (for the great price of only £20, ok so that is sarcasm right there). Luckily Ali and I had the same appointment slot so I didn’t have to go on my own, all the girls had theirs much earlier in the day so I took the opportunity to stroll around the absolutely packed Bentalls Centre. Oh that’s another thing I’ve learnt not to go into town on a Saturday unless I have too it was so packed I ended up eating lunch sat on the floor…

The enrolment itself was fine we had to explore rooms and spoke to different people from the university. I also met a lady who told me about a potential job for the uni as well as inviting me to go to something for the Chancellor, I gave her my email and I suppose we’ll see what happens. Apart from that today was quite normal I suppose I’m just getting used to being here and trying to get ready for a big week ahead. Oh God what have I let myself in for!

 

 

An Evening with Kingston Chancellor Bonnie Greer (17th September)

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I woke up and as usual scroll through my email only to notice one from Kingston Univeristy, the contents shocked me. I had been invited to attend the inauguration  of our new Chancellor Bonnie Greer an inspiring woman and the first to head the university after a long line of males. She is an author and playwright with interests in the arts as well as the sciences. I didn’t have to think twice about accepting the invitation. the evening was amazing and I had the honor of meeting so many important members of Kingston University as well as the Chacellor herself. She is an inspiration and her story is incredible. You may think that she would not be interested in a first year like me, you would be wrong. I can honestly say that Bonnie Greer is one of the nicest people I have ever met, she was grateful that myself and a third year had taken the time to wait for her to exit the room she was in to meet her. The ceremony was fantastic and I wish more of my fellow students could have had the opportunity because it honestly did make you proud to be a Kingston University student, to be English and to be a woman all in one evening. The Chancellor was even interested in my project ‘The Presentation of African American Women’ and would like to discuss it when she is available, I was gobsmacked. I can honestly say I was so lucky to be in the right place at the right time and I cannot wait to see what Chancellor Greer does next.

Birthday Girl!

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Today was my 19th birthday and I woke up feeling like death. I hate alcohol, with a passion and that my friends makes me a ‘bad fresher’. I have spent all day feeling like I need to puke and I have certainly learnt my lesson! It was so lovely that my parents and sister came to see me today I wish I had been more awake although they thought it was incredibly funny. I got some lovely presents and cards (especially the ‘punk princess’ one from my flatmates!). The thing was where I was away from home it didn’t completely feel like my birthday if you get what I mean? It just felt like another day of things to get used to and get my head around well that’s freshers week for you! In a bit of a cheeky way I also get part of my birthday tomorrow too as Ali takes me shopping for my birthday present!! I honestly can’t wait to see my family again though, as much as I love uni I did really miss them all today ❤ 

Happy Birthday to me! 

The first proper day…and possibly the best.

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Ok so today got off to a ‘proper’ student start. I hit snooze on the alarm and luckily woke up half an hour before I had to be on the bus. Brilliant. I managed to run to the bus stop where thankfully the bus was running slightly late! I headed off to Creative Writing with Beckiie which turned out to be a very amusing lecture, full of lots of laughs and starting to get excited about the course. Surprisingly we were told the rest of our 9am Lectures weren’t needed so we could enjoy ourselves, result! On to English Literature where the atmosphere was seemingly more academic and there were a lot more people! It is very organised and a bit daunting but luckily we have a very welcoming year tutor. It was also a day of a lot of busses again, we are slowly working out which ones go where. It all seems a bit boring to be honest but the day at uni wasn’t the fun part really, it was ok but there were a lot of introductions and all that jazz today. Later on Beckiie and I headed back to mine to be joined by my lovely flat mate Jamie a lovely American girl. It is so interesting learning about other cultures and we had a very long chat about the UK and USA before going to my room to try and get our timetables (still not there, sigh).

The best part was our little trip up to Kingston Hill tonight. we ended up eating the boys home made soup, having a great chat and finally having a jamming session. It was nice because Beckiie and I have had trouble finding people into our kind of music and people who would rather stay in and chill rather than going crazy in a club. It was honestly so much fun, I can’t wait to do it all again. As for tomorrow we will be off to a play in London as part of my work for Be the Red Carpet (check them out!).

 

DEAF HAVANA!!

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Today I queued for around 2 hours (on and off) in the pouring rain. Do I mind? Surprisingly no I don’t today I got to see one of my absolute favourite bands Deaf Havana! I was lucky enough to get tickets to a small record shop in town called Banquet Records and it is amazing, so many good live bands play there! It’s honestly an incredible place. After trying to navigate busses me and Ali finally made it to the record shop! Now the place can’t fit too many people in there so for only £10 each we got to see an intimate acoustic set and actually meet Deaf Havana afterwards! It was an amazing atmosphere and it just made you realise how normal they were. You could see some shaking hands, they talked openly with the crowd joking along and they had no diva side at all. It was just an incredible set and I honestly couldn’t believe just how good the harmonies were live, absolutely breath taking. As they sang one of my favorites ‘Hunstanston Pier’ I had shivers and just wanted to sing my heart out, the atmosphere was magical.  At that moment in time life just felt complete, I know how that sounds but I was where I wanted to be finally in uni, listening to an amazing band with Ali’s arms wrapped around my waist. I think I’m gonna like this place 🙂 

It got even better after that, I’m having a ball with my flat mates they’re all so lovely and we’re learning a lot from each other. I met one of the most prominent members of the Rock and Metal society today and I’m finally finding people who don’t want to go out drinking and clubbing all the time thank god! So for my birthday (which I am SUPER excited about) we will be heading to a local Rock, Punk and ‘Emo’ night which is so amazing as I’ve never even heard of that before. In short I feel like more of a musician than ever and people totally accept I want to study something different which is a first! 

 

Keep an eye out for the album guys 😉 and while your at it why not go and check out Deaf Havana’s those lads are diamonds! 

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