I’m falling asleep as I type this but I’m definitely getting better. I managed to get a ride in this afternoon, although paid for it instantly and headed to the library to get some work done and attempt to get back to normal. For now I really need my bed.

Once when I was younger I was given the advice ‘If you want to change the world become a lawyer’, although they were trying to protect me the stubborn little teenager I was became more determined. The advice wasn’t bad per say but it wasn’t me. I looked at becoming a lawyer but it just wouldn’t stick, I couldn’t stop my pen writing and my voice singing what I felt passionate about.

Since the attack on the Charlie Hebdo offices I’ve been thinking a lot and listening to any news story that I could, hoping the hostages at least would make it out alive. Like the Sydney siege, Boston Marathon Bombing, 7/7 and 9/11, this was done to put fear into us, unlike those attacks this was one trying to silence humor and freedom of speech. I’m friends with a lot of artists who felt a little shaken that day, but as well as ever they have responded. The internet is filled with drawings and responses to the attack, with intelligence, wit and humor.

You’ll notice that until this point I have not used the word Islamic Terror, and I don’t want to start. Why, you ask? Because these terrible acts of violence do not define every Muslim in the world, just as the Westboro Baptist Church doesn’t represent all Christians and the Nazi’s didn’t represent everyone in Germany. I am grateful to have friends from all religions, and although I myself am an Atheist, they have all respected that.

Those terrorist had a warped idea of what the world should be, they also thought they could silence us. How wrong have they been. These attacks, if anything, have united not only the French people, whom I offer my condolences to, but also the artistic community. Artists have reacted brandishing their best weapon, pens, pencils etc. Writes have come out in force with the message ‘ you will not destroy us’ and the people have agreed with this.

The thing is that after these kinds of horrors happen, we are a little fearful and a little more cautious. We need to remember that those feelings are perfectly human, but it is when we start to act differently due to fear that they have got what they wanted, I for one will not  be a person to let that happen. And so as the newspapers this morning report on the worry that London will be next, I won’t stop going. I’ll carry on travelling into central and going about my day, as many others will.

We cannot bring back those who have been murdered, but we can remember and honor them and those recently lost in Sydney and the ones all over the world who have been lost to terror. So we won’t forget them, we will carry on drawing, writing, remembering and support those they have left behind as much as we can because just stopping would be an insult to their memory more than anything.

Sometimes all you need is your friends. I’d had a hellish afternoon yesterday. Stuck for 2 hours on a journey that should have only taken me half an hour, then also stuck on a bus before getting home nearly 3 hours since I left Guilford.

It’s really easy when I’m tired and get some news that I didn’t particularly want it was close to spiralling. The difference is that I had something to look forward too, Eleanor made sure of that. I had so much fun out drinking (probably more than I should have), dancing and laughing. It instantly cheered me up.

After nearly falling asleep in the bathroom I decided to come home, getting a kebab too. And then I fell asleep waking up to the hangover from hell…after 4 I finally got up and dressed.

I wanted to give you a really interesting blog tonight but honestly all I wanted to do was curl up in my bed and sleep, or eat McDonalds.

I’ll leave you with that and hopefully then I’ll be able to think of something more creative for tomorrow!

I have been vertically challenged as long as I remember, just remember people you are not alone!

1. People think you are a lot younger than you are.

I didn’t start wearing make up until recently, meaning that people instantly thought I was much younger. Most embarrassing point? Hearing some guys, who obviously were younger than me, telling their friend he shouldn’t hit on me because ‘I’m about 12 or 13’…this happened a few months ago.

2. Getting given kids meals at restaurants

I’ll say it again HEIGHT DOES NOT MEAN YOU ARE YOUNG/OLD. I’m 20 years old and I still get handed a kids menu at meals much to the delight of my family.

3. You have to learn how to climb

Kitchens and bedrooms always have spaces that are too high. So you learn how to climb on just about everything, boxes, kitchen sides you name it we try it.

4. You have to ask people to reach things all the time

Unfortunately you can’t climb in shops so you have to ask people and then, if you don’t like it awkwardly put it back in an odd place meaning everyone knows it was you.

5. Your friends like using you as something to lean on

You know, the whole using you as an arm rest because you’re the perfect size…yawn.

6. People always assume you’re ‘cute’.

Say that ONE MORE TIME.

7. You have to walk a lot faster to catch up with your friends…little legs! 

Running alongside your friends in heels to keep up, not a great look or comfortable.

8. The sun visor in your car doesn’t make a difference because you’re short…you also have to pull the seat right forward. 

Driving is definitely a comical experience.

9. Your feet not touching the floor 

Forever five years old and tip toes.

10. Awkward boob hugs

Hugging your friends, their boobs, your face…always.