Remembering Robin Williams, one year on

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One year ago today, the world sadly lost Robin Williams. While some people are talking about him ‘passing away’ it’s not the truth, there was nothing graceful in Williams’ suicide. There were obviously a lot of problems that he didn’t want the world to see, but would we have wanted to? Would we have wanted to hear this man who made us laugh so much tell us that he wasn’t ok, that he was trapped in a darkness that eventually took his life. I grew up, like many others, watching Robin and laughing, Mrs Doubtfire was one of my ultimate favourites as a kid I could happily watch it over and over again.

When I heard that he had killed himself this horrible dark wave came over me. I just didn’t want to believe it, Robin Williams, depression, suicide? It couldn’t be true. I wanted to break down and cry, not because Robin was famous, because it was another bright and incredible person lost to suicide. It’s something that is so misunderstood. I personally felt so low, if he couldn’t make it, if it got him what hope was there for the rest of us. That was a bad thought but a year on I’m still sad, like many others but I can still watch Robin’s work and hope that he knows how loved he was by thousands.

Suicide is something that needs to be spoken about. Is it nice? Of course not and no one likes talking about death, especially someone wanting to take their own life. But we need to take away the taboo because that could save someone’s life. I can’t guess or assume what could have saved Robin, no one can, but we need to make sure that he and the millions of others who have killed themselves haven’t died in vain.

I’m not going to leave you with sadness, instead I will leave you with laughter, what Robin did best.

Sleep well Robin, we miss you.

Image rights go to ABC

10 things I’ve learnt living with a boy

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A year ago today I moved in with a boy, A REAL BOY. While tonight is very different from a year ago, as in the flat is actually remotely clean and there is not a microwave meal in sight, it’s made me realise that I’ve actually learnt a lot living with Ali in the last year. We did get a fair bit of stick when we told people we were going to move in together, a lot of people made judgements that it would ‘ruin the uni experience’ and that it would stop us going out. I’ve been encouraged by Ali to go out as much as I damn well want (which part of me suspects is to do with him wanting time to slob out on his own. So here are 10 things that I’ve learnt living with a boy!!

Men and Women’s definitions of clean are very different

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While I want to living room clean, he’s more concerned with my shoes in the hallway…it’s a struggle.

Space is important

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Before we moved in together I spent the majority of my time at his, hating being alone. Now I revel in our weekends apart for the fist day or so because I can literally do what I like…it’s always nice when he comes back eventually though.

It’s nice having someone to come home to

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Especially after a few  too many Sambucca’s and need a bit of help getting into my PJs. That and if I’ve had a bad day it’s great to know you have  a cuddle at home for you.

Play-fighting/pranks are on of THE greatest parts of life

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We are overgrown children, tickle fights, play fighting and switching to light off on each other when  they’re trying to go to the loo. Who said living together meant growing up?

I  can’t cook…I really can’t cook

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I’m a hopeless cook, Ali on the other hand is not. Screw gender stereotypes.

You don’t have to speak to enjoy each others company

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It’s hard to explain but just knowing someone is there is enough sometimes. I’ll work on my stuff he works on his and we’re completely happy.

Morning hugs can change your whole  day

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Honestly it can change my whole mood if I get hugs in the morning before going to work or uni.

Sometimes you will want to kill them…and that’s okay

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You can love someone as much as you want but some days they just need to go away, far, far,away.

Buying the other person take away is true love. TRUE LOVE.

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Fried Chicken after a stressful day? Nothing says I love you more.

It’s actually kind of cool

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I actually really enjoy living with Ali, even if he drives me crazy he’s a pretty cool dude to live with and now I couldn’t imagine it any other way.

Spine Update: 15 weeks in

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Now and a few weeks ago

So here we are, it’s been 15 weeks since my accident and 13 since I found out that the pain was actually a compression fracture and severe bruising on my spine. Ouch. After a stack of doctors appointments, tears, physio and recently having tiny needles stuck in me in what they call acupuncture. It’s been 15 long weeks and I’m still not really anywhere near the end.

I’m still taking pain meds, still in pain and not able to walk far and walking isn’t a good idea either. It sounds like a lot of negatives but I’m not completely bummed out, I’ve realised that there really are some amazingly supportive people around me and I really am happy. I don’t know if I’ll go back to riding, it really depends on what the surgeon says, I’m more focused on making sure I don’t do any more damage to my spine. Nothing is worth the pain and nearly losing the ability to walk.

I just wanted to write this post as a little update for all of you who asked after me and tried to cheer me up or sent me bits and pieces. I’ll keep posting updates when I hear something, I have pain clinic at the end of the month and hopefully I’ll be seeing the Neurosurgeon sooner rather than later (although they’ve been really messing up with it and I feel quite let down). I’m also still trying to do a little physio and any fitness I can, I really hope that changes soon.

Thank you again to everyone, I really couldn’t have done it without you all.

Book Review: The Baby- Lisa Drakeford

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chloe temp

1 party, 5 friends, 1 unexpected guest.

Imagine you’re in the middle of your 17th birthday party, drinks are flowing and your having a great time when you realise you haven’t seen your best friend in a while. You’re not ready for what you find. Your friend is on your bathroom floor about to give birth to a baby you know nothing about, and apparently neither did she. Olivia’s head is spinning as she has to help her best friend Nicola deliver the baby. Little does she know this baby will blow their friendship group apart. This is the start of Lisa Drakeford’s novel The Baby. The book is divided into five sections, one for each of the main characters Olivia,  her best friend Nicola, her controlling boyfriend Jonty, her gay friend Ben and her little sister Alice. We see the aftermath through each of their eyes, but all isn’t as it seems.

I’m always interested in books that focus on teenage parents and have been for as long as I can remember. As someone who stood by their best friend as they had a child at the age of 17, I was intrigued to see what Drakeford would do with her characters. It’s easy to assume that a child changes things, but I feel like there was almost too many issues with the characters and not enough novel. There are complex relationships within the group, Olivia is struggling in a controlling relationship with Jonty, Jonty hates Ben for his closeness to Olivia. The only character that isn’t involved with the group, but in my opinion has the best chapter, is Olivia’s sister Alice. Alice has no friends of her own but observes everything around her and loves helping out with Nicola’s baby at any given moment. She’s just the strange little sister but through her eyes you see more than through any other, she was my favourite character by far. As for Olivia, I felt like she was a kind of punch bag throughout the whole story and I really struggled to like her. I would have like to have seen more of Nicola and how she copes with her daughter and more of Jonty’s backstory, that was something I really enjoyed and made him a much more relatable character.

There is a big twist towards the end of the novel, which I couldn’t stand. It kind of derails the entire plot up to that point and then adds a real question mark to the end of the novel. After reading 200 pages I was beyond angry and frustrated at the twist, I’m pretty sure it’s a love or hate scenario, there will definitely be people who recommend the book to their friend on the basis of the ending, although I’m not a fan.

I’m giving this book two stars **. I really wanted to enjoy it but there really are too many issues in one short book for me to enjoy. I think that the biggest reason for my low rating is the twist at the end, it kind of ruined it for me. It isn’t that I completely loved the book throughout, but I did struggle with having positive feelings about it at the end.

Review by Chloe Metzger

Meeting Don Broco

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I’ve been a fan of Don Broco for about 3 years now and today I finally got to meet them and hear an amazing acoustic set! The boys were all lovely down to earth and I got a cuddle from each member (!!). They spent so much time talking to all the fans that the management were worried they wouldn’t get through the whole queue. It makes a real difference when bands actually take the time to have a conversation with you. I explained that I would have been at the show later too but with my back I can’t stand up for too long, they were all really sweet about it and said it was great to see me up and about at one of their shows.

I really love Broco, they’re just all solid guys and have just got bigger and bigger since I saw their set in 2012. I was addicted from the first  time I heard them and I think I drove my family mad playing their first album repeatedly, even covering one of their songs ‘Hold On’ at one point. Rob has an amazing and very unique voice, it’s hard to describe but i reminds me of melted chocolate…it’s not as weird as it sounds.

Overall great night, great to be getting back into the music scene again especially with my friend Laura who’s been around since first year and who I met at a Deaf Havana show on my first weekend at uni! I’m sure there will be a lot more going on this year, I hope so at least. I’ll leave you guys with one of their greatest songs (I think) before I become obsessed with their new album!

Babyface strikes again

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At the age of 20 and 11 months, I still manage to get ID’d if I ask for a drink with my meal at a restaurant as well as normally being given a children’s menu. Tonight on a long awaited family meal for my Nanna’s birthday my family got to have a laugh as I was asked to get my ID out in front of all of them. It is a blessing and a curse having a baby face. I get told time and time again that when I’m 30 I’ll be grateful for it. That might be so but it doesn’t help when you’re trying to buy a 15 DVD in HMV or when people ask if my Mum and Dad are home.The picture above is how I looked tonight, make up on, hair straightened and nice clothes but alas, I still look 16.

That said, if you look at the rest of my family they all look young for their age, especially my parents, neither of them look like they’re in their 40s. You can see here that my Mum’s side all have young faces too…

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It’s not all bad, I mean I can still get away with kids tickets on the train most of the time, if I’m not feeling too hungry the kids meal is normally a good option and every now and again because I’m so tiny I can fit into my little sisters hoodies (kids clothes are also cheaper). I don’t want to be a baby face forever though, especially while at work and people think you’re the kid on school work experience. ‘I’m 21′ I want to shout at them ’21!!!!!!!’.

This was just a quick blog tonight guys, I’m sorry last nights blog wasn’t posted I was completely absorbed in a Paula Daly book (the review for which will be out in a few weeks!). Back to business though are there any fellow baby faces reading this? What is the most embarrassing thing to happen because you look young? Or maybe you have something you really enjoy! Let me know!

Sisters – The ride of my life.

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I’m struggling tonight. I’m struggling to get what I want to say on to the page, or really to know what I want to say at all. My sister’s gone home and it’s the first time in three days I’ve had time to just sit with my own thoughts and man they’re loud. It’s weird not to have Sum’s here because it’s just so natural to me to have my little sister around.

Every time I spend time with her now I just marvel at the person she is. I can’t be more proud of the kid, well she’s not a kid any more exactly. She’s smart, funny and just an awesome person that I’m so incredibly blessed to have in my life. I always get a little sad when we’re apart because I had this big thing when I went to uni, I was scared of not being around for her. Basically I didn’t want her to have the same troubles and make the same mistakes I did. She doesn’t and she hasn’t and I’m so grateful. In the hardest of times it was my sister that got me through, I could never have let her down, I don’t know if she knows that. At the same time she NEVER has to be perfect or pretend to be, she’s pretty awesome just the way she is.

She also reminded me that I’m not her age any more. I’m about to go into my third year at uni and that is more than a little bit terrifying. I’m finally going into this big unknown. What am I going to do for a job? Am I going to still want to do my PhD? Will I get the funding I need? Or will I just jump into something completely different? Will the band take off and I finally get to perform for a living?

Her excited voice and endless amounts of energy have shushed the worries for a little while but I know they’re there. I know that I’m heading towards the unknown and old enough to admit that it’s both overwhelmingly terrifying and incredibly exciting. I can plan as much as I like but I have no idea what’s going to happen. All I know is that my sister’s going to be coming along for the ride and she’s an awesome person to take along.

Paper Towns Advanced Screening!

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Tonight Summer and I were lucky enough to go to an advanced screening of Paper Towns at my local cinema. I’m a huge fan of John Green, he’s one of my all time favourite writers and last year’s film The Fault in Our Stars is possibly my all time favourite film as well as a book that left me speechless. To say that I was excited for tonight was an understatement.

I have to say that the film doesn’t disappoint. When I heard that Cara Delevinge was playing Margo I have to admit I was a little sceptical, it was wasn’t how I saw Margo in my head. I was completely wrong because Cara just acts so well as Margo, there are moments here and there where her British accent slips up but I think that’s only because we got to see the Q&A footage before seeing the movie (where she sounds very British). I don’t know, now I’ve seen it she’s won me over and will forever be the most amazing Margo. As for Quentin, or Q, John Green was right when he said that he Nat Wolff was born to play him. He expresses the good guy/ awkward/ hopelessly in love guy that we all know and love from the book.

The film made me and the rest of the audience laugh, a lot. It also had a much more diverse audience than TFIOS did when it came out. There were such a mix of people, I was really surprised! Also, my sister has never read Paper Towns and she didn’t feel like she didn’t understand it or missed anything out, so don’t feel like you need to have read the book to enjoy. Oh and if you did enjoy TFIOS look out for an awesome cameo!

The best thing is that although I knew what was going to happen, I still had shivers up my spine, I still wanted to know about the mystery of Margo. It takes a very special film to make you forget what you’ve already read and get lost all over again. I was disappointed that the Seaworld scene wasn’t in the movie, it was my favourite part of the book so I was a little let down and there was one change towards the end that I wished was the same as the book. It wasn’t bad at all, just different. That said I fully accept that it can’t be exactly the same as the book.

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Summer and I waiting to go in, with giant slushies of course

There’s something about Green’s books when they are turned into films that sparks this feeling inside me. With TFIOS it was the feeling of wanting and needing to love, love no matter what because you never know how long you’re going to get. Paper Towns just reminded me to keep doing what I want to do, not to slip into that life of doing what you’re supposed to do when you’re supposed to do it, to embrace and crave some extraordinary things.

Would I recommend seeing Paper Towns?  Yes. It’s not overtaken TFIOS as my favourite movie, but it has made me want to go back and read the novel and in fact appreciate the novel more. It’s so funny and just takes you along for the ride, oh and Radar and Ben are PERFECT. The chemistry between the trio was amazing, sometimes you forgot that you weren’t watching three best friends. As with the relationship between Cara and Natt, it was in a word, perfect. As soon as it hits general release, go and watch, if you’re a John Green fan, you won’t be disappointed. Similarly if you want to have a girl crush over Cara’s eyebrows this is also a film for you!

Guess who’s heeeeeeeeere!!

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Today after frantically cleaning and tidying my flat in the past few days my baby sister arrived to stay with me for a few days. I got the surprise of my little cousin coming to see me when Sum’s was dropped off which just made it even more special. We spent the afternoon after my cousin and Mum left pretty bored. It was too late to go out and do something but too early to just crash for the evening. So we did what any normal pair of sisters do, we bought Pizza, had a play fight and watched Netflix. Sorted.

After a few hours of doing nothing we had to do something before we killed each other (we can’t have that on day one). So we decided to make cakes, but not just any cakes. Hold the freaking press because we made PEPPA PIG CUPCAKES.

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Today might have been slow but from tomorrow morning I’ve got so much for us both to do giving her a look around the music buildings, going into town shopping, grabbing a quick dinner and then off to see Paper Towns tomorrow night! Eeek. Then spend more time laying around and messing around before watching the Bike Race on Sunday (Cyclists. Damn Cyclists.) visiting the comic book shop and seeing what’s up around the town centre, having dinner and then she’ll be heading home…followed by me on Tuesday.

For now we’re sat in matching PJ bottoms, both on our laptops stuffed with pizza and cakes and all that jazz, hopefully we’ll sleep at some point too.

Book Review: The Accident Season – Moïra Fowley-Doyle

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‘It’s the accident season,

the same time every year.

Bones break, skin tears, bruises bloom.’

The Accident Season has been hailed by many, as an incredible book, my local Waterstone’s had a particular fondness for it, so I thought I might as well pick it up. The novel focuses on the ‘Accident Season’ a time of cuts, bruises and at times even deaths. Moïra Fowley-Doyle takes suspicion and fear and sets it right in the middle of modern day Ireland. Our protagonist, 17 year old Cara, is an ok narrator, at times I got frustrated with her simplicity and would much rather have followed her older sister Alice, who seems a lot more interesting to me. Added to this is Cara’s ‘ex stepbrother’ Sam and her best friend the witchy Bea’ The Accident Season is a tale of secrets and makes you, at times, question what is real.

I think my biggest gripe with this is that for about ¾ of the novel it moves very slowly. There are twists in the book but the problem is that some of the biggest ones I managed to work out fairly early on, which was a shame. It sits in this strange thriller, horror world but at the same time tries to follow the normal lives of four teenagers. I really struggled to believe in the season itself and all the terrible things that are meant to have happened. To me it just seemed like they all had a bit of a terrified mother (which later makes much more sense than for most of the book) who wanted to wrap her kids up in cotton wool.

As well as the kids dealing with their mother’s fears, there is also a mystery to be solved, in the form of Cara’s classmate, Elsie. While looking through photos Cara soon realises that Elsie is in each and every one of her photos, even though it’s impossible. While Cara enlists the help of Bea and Sam to work out if Elsie is following her they make a starting discovery, Elsie has disappeared and no one seems to know who she is. I can say with absolute certainty that the Elsie part of the plot is definitely the most interesting and I wish there had been even more of it in the book. At times it feels a little like there are other issues that are just there to pad out the novel rather than to add to it.

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There is a big element of fantasy and folk tales throughout, which is something I really liked. I wish it had been bought into the plot earlier as the first few chapters just seem a bit strange without it, you don’t really understand why a sane person could come up with the idea of an ‘accident season’. There are a lot of accidents, but I think I sided more with Alice’s rational thinking too much to really enjoy the novel. It is not in any way that this novel is badly written, Fowley-Doyle does have a knack for story telling, but I couldn’t help but feel throughout that this would be better suited to a film script. I’m saying it now before it happens, this would make a kick ass film and I expect it to be picked up sooner rather than later.

I’m giving The Accident Season three stars ***, like I said before it wasn’t badly written, I just lost the excitement at quite a few points throughout. I need a book that is impossible to put down and for most of The Accident Season, it was easy to walk away from. That said I think if you are into a bit of mystery and horror this is worth a read.

Review by Chloe Metzger