Gramps.

Jul 5, 2016Leave a comment

When I was between 1 and 2 years old I would stand in my cot and shout DAN-DAD at the top of my voice until my Gramps came home from work, much to my Mum’s dismay I would not sleep until I knew he was at the house. When I was 7 I went to London to go on the London Eye, go on a boat and see the Tower of London. When I was 13 I would go and sit every Sunday I could and watch TV and have cups of tea while talking about history. When I was 16 I would debate politics for hours. When I was 18 I was taken to the station to get my train to university for the first time. Now I’m 21 and I have a gym buddy and I still sit for hours drinking tea and talking and I still debate politics, although it gets a little more intense now. Today, my Gramps turns 70, he’s one of my favourite people in the world. We’re so close and I count my blessings every day that we are that close and have that relationship.

Happy Birthday Gramps, you’re one in a million.

Why We Need to Talk About Post University Depression

Jul 4, 201617 Comments

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It’s that time of year. Exams are long gone, results published and gowns ordered. We’re told that now is when we enter the ‘real world’ of jobs and adult things. While it is all new and exciting there is something that many people don’t, or don’t want to talk about, that’s the feeling of loss that comes with finishing university. There’s almost a feeling that you can’t be sad, you have a degree! You’re one of the lucky ones, right?

Post university depression is something that I’ve come across a lot online. Over the past few weeks I’ve found myself struggling sometimes and although people may just say that’s my pre existing depression, I can tell you it’s something different. You got from all the pressure and stress os exams to nothing in a matter of weeks and then from that point onwards you’re asked about what you’re going to do next, do you have a job lined up/ There’s also the inevitable, for most, of having to head back to the old town, into your old bedroom and having to stay with Mum and Dad again. Add that to not having your friends around the corner, is it any wonder it can all feel a little bit much?

Of course it’s not all bad BUT society just seems to have a filter when it comes to the impact that these changes can have on someone’s mental health. I’ve noticed that in the period straight after my coursework was handed in, a mere few days after deadlines I felt a huge pressure to get a job and know what every part of my life was going to be. I started falling back into more days spent in bed and more anxiety attacks about my future than I’d had in awhile and on top of it all the access to my mental health support was cut as soon as I handed in my last essay. With all the uncertainty, moving and, for some, not getting the result that they wanted there can be a lot impacting a person emotionally.

So, I’m writing this blog to start the conversation. To say that even though I have a job and it’s going well I still have days where I feel really down and can’t believe university is over. There are still nights when I just can’t sleep because I don’t know how to do this adult thing and I miss my friends and knowing that I just have to go to classes and read a lot. Apparently this is all normal, but we still don’t want to talk about it. I have to say if anyone feels like it really is more than just post uni blues PLEASE talk to someone about it, and if you feel you need to see a doctor (they’re not going to put a ‘crazy’ stamp on you and that’s that, trust me).

Sometimes we all need a little bit of help in times of change, you’re not alone.

image from Pinterest

Sunday Seven: Seven Things I Learnt Doing a Big Move

Jul 3, 2016Leave a comment

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I’ve moved a total of three times in my life prior to this weekend. The first time I was two and moved into my parents current house with my Mum after her and Dad had first bought it, the second was into Halls and the third was into the flat that Ali and I shared. Now I’m sat in the new house and I thought I’d put together seven things I learnt in my biggest move so far.

The more boxes you can get hold of for free, the better

Seriously, boxes are damn expensive. We had to buy two lots because obviously everyone was moving out of uni at the same time. If you can plan in advance and get boxes for free.

You have more stuff than you think you do

I honestly thought I had less stuff but you’d be incredibly surprised how much stuff you can accumulate over time, really surprising.

Saying goodbye to a place feels weird

Kingston has been my home for three years and driving out across the bridge yesterday with the town disappearing in the mirror was weird and a little heartbreaking. It’s still sinking in that it’s not my home anymore.

Having a panic/cry is ok

I felt very overwhelmed when we got to the other end and again this morning. Moving is a BIG DEAL! It’s ok to have a little panic and let yourself feel what you need to feel.

You’ll notice strange things about your new place

After moving from the centre of Kingston and living on a busy one way system I couldn’t get over how damn quiet it is at night. At my Mum’s I’m near a quite busy road but here I can’t hear anything and it’s dark, so dark.

Little things become very exciting

I’m living somewhere with a garden. A GARDEN. There were no gardens in Kingston for us.

There’s nothing better than having your family close by

The best part about moving is the fact that I’m closer to my family and there’s nothing better than that.

image from Pinterest

Getting Our Move On

Jul 2, 2016Leave a comment

Hello, hello, hello!

I’m writing this to you from our new home, which is very weird. We’ve moved in with Ali’s Mum for a while, we’ll be looking and sorting out our next place to call our own but for now we’re staying in the house along with Ali’s mum, sister and cat Suki. Of course the Hamsters are also here, although carefully shut in the bedroom so that Suki doesn’t take more than a little bit of a liking to them.

While we were driving back together (the first time Ali’s been on the motorway in my new car) we talked about how it felt to be back, how everything was going to fit in. I have to say I’ve been pleasantly surprised, I’m feeling ok. I honestly thought I’d be really down and stressed, but it’s been ok. For the first time in three years we have a garden and at night it’s actually quiet, my family are just around the corner. We don’t have to deal with drunk students and people smoking outside our window. There are things were going to miss, obviously, we loved Kingston. I’ll miss the riverside, the fact I can just pop in and see my best friend every weekend while picking up my comic books.

There’s a new chapter in our lives and everything is happening. I won’t lie I’m absolutely exhausted and feeling a little rough at the moment but at the same time there’s no one I’d rather go through this with. He’s pretty fab and let’s see what the future is going to hold.

Book Review: Dear Thing – Julie Cohen

Jun 30, 2016Jun 30, 20161 Comment

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How could one selfless act make you feel like a monster?

One baby. Two mothers.

Dear Thing…

It’s not every day that your best friend offers to carry a child for you, a dream that looked like it would never come true. This is the case for Ben and Romily, friends since university and inseparable. In the midst of another miscarriage for Ben’s wife Claire, Romily offers to carry a baby for them and to donate her eggs. While at first all goes to plan and runs smoothly it isn’t long until Romily’s feelings develop into something more. While carrying the child of the man she has loved for years she starts to dream of the impossible…keeping a baby that she knows isn’t hers to keep.

I loved the fact that this novel is bold in the face of a tricky subject as well as being believable. A lot of the time novels about surrogacy are quite fluffy and don’t have the complications that Dear Thing has. The relationships are real to us because frankly it could happen to anyone, Romily is sure that the reason she is doing this is because she wants to help her friend after everything he’s done for her. We know she’s battling with her feelings and so does she but I find the character to have remarkable strength and she becomes so real to us because she’s honest. Cohen has done an incredible job of breaking taboos, breaking this image of a ‘natural mother’. Romily does a great job in her own non-conventional way but so does Claire, Cohen highlights a mothers struggles, triumphs and the thoughts most won’t speak out loud.

I’ll admit the character of Jarvis threw me a little and to some seems like a plot device but I liked him. I feel like without a new character and relationship dynamic the novel could have quickly got boring and left the characters weak. On that subject I have to say that Posie is my absolute favourite character because there is nothing like the honesty of a child that always listens. What Cohen has done so well with these relationships the way the characters relate to each other, this isn’t a novel full of happy endings and rainbows, there are times when you feel deep sadness for them or even happiness.

This novel is one that makes you think, not judge, a rare thing in these types of literature. You know what makes sense but reading through you begin to question and in a sense live through the situation and it’s not all black and white, there are a million shades of grey and just as many ways the novel could end…you’ll have to pick up a copy to find out though!

I’m giving this novel 5 stars *****! I absolutely loved it. While it’s thought provoking it’s not too intense on the ready the pace is gentle and fairly steady meaning that if you have a tonne to do (which I did when I was reading it) there are places you can stop, although I warn you, you won’t want to! This is an incredibly well-crafted novel, thoughtful, realistic and bold, go grab a copy now before her next novel, Falling, is released next month.

Review by Chloe Metzger

Strike a Match.

Jun 29, 2016Jun 29, 20163 Comments

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The past three years haven’t just been filled with study, they’ve lead other parts of my life to change too. I wrote yesterday about taking chances and way back in first year the boys and I took a chance at putting a band together and playing a load of shows. I’ve done more with this band than I have before, we’ve played great venues, recorded then scrapped it then recorded again. I’ve been waiting so long to be able to tell you all that our new singles are out. The process was slowed down a few times for various reasons, the main pushback for this not being out a year ago was because of my broken back, you can’t record if you can’t stand and are half asleep on painkillers. Fact. For a long time I blamed myself that we didn’t have this finished, that we weren’t touring the country but then I stopped and worked with that we had. What we had was some great show experience, a friendship and memories that would last. So at times it may have felt like this would never come out and now it’s finally here and being listened too! You have no idea how weird it is to be able to type the band name into iTunes and then have my voice come through the speakers. There has been blood, sweat and tears that have gone into the writing, the planning the recording, the shows we played, the hours of practice.

So, finally, I present to you all Strike a Match, click here to head to iTunes and have a listen!

Taking a Chance

Jun 28, 2016Jun 28, 20163 Comments

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If I’ve learnt anything in the past year it’s that you can make all the plans you want, life has a way of making sure you do what you need to do. I’m going down a completely different path to the one that I thought I would, because I took a chance.

I’d set up this whole plan of being an academic, staying in Kingston and just seeing what happened. I realise now that that career path was partly due to fear. I thought I would stay in education forever because it was something I was good at, I was the smart girl and there was money to be won, it just seemed like a natural progression. Then this year I just kind of fell out of love with the idea slowly. I got told by my lecturers how they struggled, that they couldn’t get jobs and were in so much debt. That’s one thing I didn’t want. I hate borrowing money and I hate being in debt, I didn’t want to do all of that work and deal with all the stress and then not have a job at the end of it.

Falling into doing Marketing by accident was the best thing I ever did. It had been suggested to me that I look into it before but I thought you had to be a bigshot to do marketing, apparently not. It’s something that I’m good and similarly with my job, I just threw myself in and applied. I just thought, why not? And I got it. I think that’s what I’m going to take from the uni experience, just do things and see what happens. I know I’ve landed myself with a brilliant job, I’m learning, working with some amazing people and hopefully I’ll be travelling for work too, something I never thought I would do.

Image from Pinterest

The New Girl

Jun 27, 2016Leave a comment

Hello, hello, hello!

Today was a BIG DAY. I am now working full time and adulting hard. I drove my new car to work this morning, arriving at 10 and headed straight into a big team meeting. I already feel like a part of the team and like everyone I work with. Everyone is super nice and is always willing to help out or explain something and there was an additional member of the team today, nicknamed Exodog. One of my colleagues brought his dog in, a little white bundle of fluff who followed me around for a good part of the day. I’m absolutely shattered and have a lot to do but I’m happy, and that’s what counts.

Overwhelmed.

Jun 25, 20162 Comments

Mental illness doesn’t disappear, even when your life is on the up. Tomorrow is a big day, tomorrow I put some bags and my hamsters in a car go to my parents and start the next part of my life. I’ll pick up my new car (!!) and then in the morning go to my new job that I’ll hopefully have for a long time to come. Everything is on the up, life’s getting better and better but I still find myself at times suffocated by my anxiety and feeling like I can’t breathe. I’m excited and terrified at the same time but it feels like everything is going so fast and I need to hold on to something. I guess this is normal, it’s a normal thing for someone who’s having this much change happening in their life to feel. I do have a bonus, I’m moving closer to my family and as of next weekend I’ll have Ali back by my side. I know everything will be ok and this is just a phase in my life but either way, my anxiety is kicking up a notch and I’m going to make sure I can live with it and not let it take over my life.

Marvel Collector Corps: Women of Power Review and Unboxing

Jun 24, 2016Jun 24, 20165 Comments

It’s that time again! Yes, yesterday my Marvel Collector Corps box landed yesterday and knowing that Spider Gwen was on the front of the box got me SUPER excited when it was announced so I couldn’t wait to get my hands on the box and see what’s inside. So for my full unboxing and review keep scrolling, if you DON’T want any spoilers then pop back later.

Spider Gwen T-shirt

This is my favourite part of the box this month. Spider Gwen was the first comic book that I properly got into, Spider man the first super-hero. Although I’m not keen on it being grey (it’s summer, everyone’s all sweaty and gross) but I do love the design.

Pin and Badge

As usual there are the badge and pin that come with every set. I’m not that keen on the design and feel like there could have been better women to put on, just my opinion.

Civil War 2, Issue 1

I’ve been waiting to pick this up for a while and I’m super happy it was included. Obviously Captain Marvel is key in this series and it’ll be interesting to have a flick through and see how it holds up to the original Civil War. Also I absolutely love the cover, as I do with all the variants I’ve received so far.

Mystery Mini’s

I kind of didn’t get the point of these. The whole point of mystery mini’s is the excitement of not knowing what’s in the box and seeing who you get. Giving us these with the characters on the front was kind of disappointing and took away from the point of them.

Squirrel Girl Pop Vinyl

Now I’ll admit, I didn’t know Squirrel girl was a thing, I’ve never seen her, read a comic book and of that. I was quite disappointed with her and I won’t be keeping the pop.

Overall this is the box that I’ve liked least since I started collecting. While I can appreciate that for some it was a good box I was very underwhelmed. I’m holding out a lot more hope for the next MCM box which is Spider Man, but unfortunately this one wasn’t for me.