Sunday Seven: Reasons to go to Brighton Pride!

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This weekend I went to my first Pride Festival ever! Abbie and I trekked down to Brighton (in the middle of all the Waterloo closures, not fun) to celebrate love for everyone and to visit Ali while he was working the festival. So, why should you attend Pride? Here are 7 reasons…

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1.This oversized deck chair

Yes, yes I am putting this as a reason. I’m also grateful no one managed to get a picture of me and my tiny legs trying to get out of said deck chair.

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2. The People 

Everyone is happy at Pride and just lovely. Here are two amazing guys we met watching the parade, they also had pink sparkly batons. We shared glitter, spoke to random people, took pictures of groups. It was just a great friendly atmosphere.

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3. You can dance to great, cheesy music

Here I am dancing in the 1985 tent. Yep, there was a 1985 tent. The whole festival was full of incredible music but my heart was definitely with anything cheesy, I wasn’t disappointed. Even if I didn’t know that many of the tunes playing when I was in the tent.

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4. The Parade

Everyone in Brighton gets involved in the Parade. I’ve never seen anything like it, as well as a variety of communities, there were huge brands, all the emergency services. Everyone covered in glitter and stars and rainbows. The floats are huge and absolutely amazing, they also literally stop the whole city centre.

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5. Glitter and bright colours everywhere.

I don’t think I’ve ever seen more glitter in my life than at Pride. Above is how I started my day, pink and blue eyeshadow and multicoloured stars. I thought I was prepared. It was so glittery that even the floor on the street was covered in glitter, all the toilets, everything. All. The. Glitter.

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6. To have a great day with your friends 

Abbie and I got to have a great time being silly, drinking wine and just having a damn good time at the best party we’ve ever been to.

 

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7. To celebrate love and remember those who can’t 

This is the whole reason for Pride. We’re celebrating all kinds of love. We’re also remembering those who have died for their love, those who cannot be open in love and more.

 

A big thank you to my best friend Abbie for taking a lot of these photos while we were trying to say phone battery ❤

Feminist Fridays: Women’s Glossy Mags

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Pop down to any local supermarket or corner shop and in one section you’ll see a spread of glossy covers with pink lettering and ‘perfect’ women gracing the cover. You can’t hide the fact that women’s glossies are a huge industry and not one that’s slowing down anytime soon.

So, how does that sit with my feminist instincts? In the last few years, there have been subtle changes in the writing, less ‘how to please your man’ and more ‘how to be successful’. But there is still endless articles on relationships, fashion and makeup. It’s a thin line.

A year or so ago I stopped reading women’s mags because they didn’t make me feel great about myself and because after reading The Vagenda, I felt that a break might be good. In the last month or so I’ve found myself picking them up again, browsing and just reading bits I want to but it’s troubled me.

Am I less of a feminist for buying into the culture? Does it matter what I read? Am I influenced by articles and wrinkles and cellulite? I think I’m not but sometimes I fear I am. I write for a magazine (pre-order it here) and hope that it is inspiring. I want my writing to empower women, not make them want to change themselves.

Of course, there are steps in the right direction, talking of women’s plights around the world, politics, women’s marches, LGBTQ rights, and more. There is definitely a shift in the issues, but is it enough? Can we put issues of cosmetic surgery, brands that only the elite can afford and similar sit that close to each other?

So lovely reader, I ask you, can glossy mags still be Feminist? Let me know in the comments below!

 

Let me know in the comments below!

Book Review: One of us is lying – Karen M McManus

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The Brain. The Beauty. The Criminal. The Athlete. The Outcast. A Murder. 

Six students enter detention, all claiming that they are innocent of what lead them there. What appears to be a seemingly normal day ends in murder, suspicion and a bond that can never be broken.

Now, before I start, does that line remind you of anything, anything in particular? If you’re a fan of anything eighties related, like me, it will. Yes, part of the draw for me was that this was reminiscent of The Breakfast Club, one of my favourites. I was lucky enough to be approved by the publishers to get this as an early release and I’m glad I did.

The novel is very much aware of the fact it has all the ingredients for a YA cliché and gets that out of the way pretty early. Each chapter is from the perspective of one of the group, alternating and showing varying perspectives. I did feel, towards the end, that the story focused more on two particular characters and evolved more into their story, which wasn’t a bad thing but I wanted more info on all of them rather than just two.

In terms of the actual mystery itself, I actually found it really clever when it was all pieced together and didn’t see it coming. Obviously, I’m not going to spoil it for you, what kind of reviewer would I be?! I’m not going to lie there were some elements that I worked out before they happened but they were done in such a way that I enjoyed reading them.

Overall, I gave this four stars. I actually read it within a mere few hours, it has a perfect pace and interesting plot. I was genuinely invested in the characters and just wanted to know who the murder was, who was lying? There were some points were I felt it was a little close to The Breakfast Club, however, I’d definitely recommend this novel.

Review by Chloe Metzger

A new month, a new woman 

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It’s not often that people blow their own trumpet, it’s frowned upon to stand up and say, actually I’m pretty damn awesome. It’s something I’ve got a history of struggling with and I’ll bet most of you do too. I’m more than certain it’s an ingrained British thing. We’re not supposed to shout about being great like our American cousins across the pond. But what if we did? What if we just thought we were cool?  I had that moment a few weeks ago. I felt like a new woman and that maybe, just maybe, things could get better from here. It’s a cautious hope but it’s definitely there. That is because the last 5 weeks of my life have been transformative. I know that sounds a bit sappy, but it has.

It started with leaving my job at Tech Data, I was given gifts and hugs from friends I had made in the three months that I’d been there. The confidence boost after losing my job in April was huge for me. Following that having a week in the sun, just Ali and I gave me a chance, for the first time since graduating, I could just enjoy my time without worry.  And I took a big step for me and my anxiety, I flew home alone, me! Someone who nearly cried when she had to get a bus alone for the first time all the way back in my first year of university.

Getting back and starting my new job I was nervous, of course, I was but something felt good about this job. I quickly started and got stuck in, learn names and met clients. I realised that I could pick things up in good time and maybe, just maybe, this was something that I could really be good at. I don’t want to get ahead of myself but for the first time since graduating I’m not in a constant state of anxiety over my job…and it’s been 4 weeks. That’s a record for me.

On top of that I’ve started dipping my toes into going out. I do like being at home, I love nothing more than having a nice weekend with Ali curled up in the flat. That said, sometimes my anxiety got too much and I would hide, I didn’t want to go outside. Now, I’m slowly planning things. I got to book club once a month, I go to the gym with Abbie, we’ve been out the last two weekends and this weekend I’ll go to Pride in Brighton.

I don’t think I’m cured, that I’m a different person and I’ll never be anxious or depressed ever again, but I do have some hope. I know all too well that the depression is always there, it’s somewhere in my mind and it will come back but I will deal with that when it comes and, of course, Ali will be right by my side.

July Favourites!

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Books

I haven’t read as much as I’d like to this month, partially because I’ve been focusing on my new job (although more on that later). Also, I read books that I didn’t particularly enjoy which is a shame. I did, love the few I did get too. On my holiday I managed to read George R.R.  Martin’s latest novel, set before A Song of Ice and Fire, thankfully this was only around 300 pages and a good start to a new series. I also got to read Dreadnought by April Daniels (review here), which I will recommend to absolutely everyone because you need to read it NEED to! Next up was One of Us Is Lying, think Breakfast Club meets murder mystery. I really enjoyed it and it’s definitely worth a read. I also read Big Little Lies, personally, I don’t think it’s worth the hype but my friend did take some pictures of me reading it…

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Watching

Of course, I’ve been watching Game of Thrones, I can’t believe we’re over a quarter of this season through already. At this point, I honestly have no idea who will end up on the Iron Throne but I have some idea of who we’ll be saying goodbye to this season.

Fashion and Beauty 

If you follow me on Instagram you will know that I cut off my hair! Yep, I booked the appointment walked in and got the wonderful Millie to take it off and I’m so much happier for it! I also went and bought my new ‘out there’ coat from Zara in the sale. Spray paint, sequins and bright pink fluffy material, it was more than a coat it was a signal, I’m here world! I also picked up 3 new dresses from H&M for work in cute colours and designs. And finally, not specifically beauty but I have been getting back into the gym with Abbie. Healthy body, healthy mind, right?

Holiday 

This is the last time I’ll mention it for a while I swear…or at least I’ll try. Of course one of my favourites this month was my trip to Majorca! You can read about it here.

 

General

I’ve had so much going on this month, so to squeeze it into a few pictures! I started my new job and only a few days later went to house sit for my Mum caring for the Fur Babies Lottie and Ed. It wasn’t just a big month for me, my baby sister turned 16, left school and had her prom she looked so beautiful and I can’t quite believe how she’s growing up.  It’s also been a collecting month with San Diago Comic Con pop vinyls (super hard to get) released and I was so happy to be able to get my two Harry Potter ones I’d hoped for, I also have pre ordered a few of wave 3… I’ve also had some great events a leaving Tea Party, going to see The Addams Family Musical and Abbie’s 23rd birthday!

 

Top 5 posts: 

Top tips for flying alone 

The truth about being in a long term relationship 

Book review: Dreadnought by April Daniels 

10 things I’ve realised since graduating

Taking chances and making calls  

 

 

 

Sunday Seven: My Busy Week!

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Ever since I got back from Majorca, my life has been so damn busy! To the point where I worried my blog was suffering because I was getting home and just falling asleep. This week, in particular, has been so busy but also a lot of fun, so for something a little different I wanted to share with you a snippet from my super busy week!

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Wickett 

While I was staying at my Mum’s house sitting, Wickett and I had some quality time and he started to fall asleep in my hand. This was a BIG deal, Wickett hates being picked up, he really doesn’t like it. So for him to cuddle up and let me hold him was huge. I really wanted Ali to see and cuddle him and this week Ali to have the cuddle too!

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Goth lipstick of dreams 

When I was a teenager I wanted to be a full emo/goth but I was never quite brave enough to get black lipstick. I found some for a pound and decided what the hell. Who knows when I’ll wear it (it was to go see the Addams family but it was raining and smudgy). My Dad says this picture makes it look like I’m in a movie, I’m down with that.

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New Harry Potter Pops! 

There are new Funko pops. I may have pre ordered one or two…oops.

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Dinner with friends 

Ali works most weekends in the summer, which means organising going out with friends can be difficult. We finally managed to lock down an evening where the four of us could go to dinner at a local pub. Look at this dessert though. Nom.

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Sonia’s leaving tea party

I’m going to be taking over from a lovely lady called Sonia while she is on maternity leave. We had an absolutely adorable tea party for her on Friday with cakes, biscuits and tea. It was all so adorable and tasted so good. I think the whole office was on a sugar crash at the end of the day.

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My first work night out 

That evening I went for my first Indian! I know, I’m 22 years old and have never had an Indian. I had the best time chatting, eating and drinking with my new colleagues. I also had the first glass of wine I’ve ever really enjoyed. New woman, right here.

 

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The Addams Family Musical! 

Abbie and I went to Southampton for her birthday surprise! I’ve had these tickets for MONTHS and it was so hard not telling her, I almost burst on her birthday last week because I was so excited. I’m a huge fan of Carrie Hope Fletcher who played Wednesday Addams, she didn’t disappoint!

 

I wish I could say this week was going to be a slower one, but I’d be wrong with dinners, writing and Pride! Here’s to a busy summer!

Book Review: Alice in Brexitland – Lucien Young

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‘You don’t have to be mad to live here but it helps’

Every day in the news all we hear is Brexit, Brexit, Brexit, for young Alice it’s something she’d rather forget. Lucien has taken a classic about a young girl falling into a crazy world and, well, put her in our crazy world instead. Based on the Lewis Carroll classic Alice in Brexitland is political satire at its best and the best part? No one is safe!

I love a bit of Satire and after seeing copies in the shop I knew I wanted to give it a try. While I wasn’t a big lover of the original novel as a child, this is an absolutely brilliant new take. All of the original favorites The Mad Hatter, Queen of Hearts (our very own current Prime Minister, Theresa May), White Rabbit, Tweedle Dumb and Tweedle Dee, the Cheshire Cat and Caterpillar have all been transformed into the hot shots who were in the fight for Europe one way or another.

Another part that I absolutely loved was the illustrations that accompanies the tale not only are they incredibly well done, they’re also hilarious… I don’t think I’ll be able to view Borris Johnson the same way again!

I gave Alice in Brexitland 4 stars. While this is a short review for a short book I can guarantee it will create a lasting impression. There’s a lot of doom and gloom at the moment in politics, so if you’re a little bit fed up (aren’t we all) or the drama and want a quick read, a bit of fun and ridiculousness then this is the book for you, there might even be another political figure who’s in the firing line…

As always thank you to Netgalley, Lucien Young and Ebury Press for this in exchange for an honest review.

Yes, your butt looks big in that – honesty in relationships

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It’s a long standing joke, the question, ‘does my butt look big in this?’ Most of the time when watching films, usually a comedy, the partner will exclaim ‘of course not!’, without thinking they will boost your ego. But, what if it does make your butt look big? I’m talking about honesty in general, of course, there are a lot more pressing issues than how your bottom looks in a new piece of clothing. A lot of us say we want a completely honest relationship but if your significant other was to tell you that it did, what would you do? Or would you tell your partner your true feelings?

Ali is an honest person, he always has been. If I ask him for his opinion he’ll tell me. I once asked him if he thought I’d put on weight, he told me ‘yes’ but went on to say if I wanted to do anything about it, he would help me, if not, that’s fine too. We’ve been this way for a long time, even as teenagers he would call me out on my BS. If I was having an argument with a friend and went too far he would tell me. Of course, there have been little white lies, I’m sure. I’m not going out with a saint.

What is great is that it will work both ways, I’ll tell him when I think he’s being too nice or if I have a different opinion on work for example. Have we had arguments form being honest with each other? Of course. Is it always nice? Nope. That said, I’d rather the person I trust the most tell me than him let someone else because he’s too scared to, what kind of relationship is that?

I’m not saying it’s easy, because it’s not. It’s taken us nine years to get to this point. Where we know how to say it as well as what to say without hurting the other person’s feelings. Instead of saying ‘your butt looks huge it’s a no go’, he might say, ‘I’m not sure it shows off your shape that well’ instead. See, honest that it’s not the right dress, not cruel.

What are your tips and troubles with being honest in relationships?

Let me know in the comments below!

Sunday Seven: Ways to kick anixiety’s butt!

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I know that sometimes, it can feel like you don’t have anxiety, you are absorbed by the sneaky bugger. Right now, I’m pleased that I’m managing my anxiety, but now and again, of course, I have my moments where I wonder if I’ll feel ok again. It’s on these days it is that little bit harder here are 7 things you can do.

Write a list of things you need to do 

Only what you need to get done, don’e be consumed by something you need to get done tomorrow or next week. Break big tasks down and take it day by day.

Be kind to yourself

When I’m in an anxious state, I know most of the time that it’s not logical. That there are things I’m anxious about that I don’t need to be or I’ll beat myself up over small things. Know that you’re just having a bad day, it will pass.

Get some light in!

Natural sunlight is a great mood booster even five minutes can help you out so open those windows.

Make sure you have contact with positive people 

It can be really hard, particularly if your anxiety means you want or need to be alone but make sure that you can contact people who make you feel comfortable.

Do something you enjoy 

Read, watch a TV show you love, colour do something you enjoy that you’ll find relaxing.

Express how you feel!

Only you will know the best way to calm your anxious mind but don’t bottle it up. For some doing something creative will help unleash how you feel, for others making something or solving a problem. Whatever works, you do you!

What are your tips? Let me know in the comments below!

10 things I’ve realised since graduating

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On July 21st 2016 I graduated. I have an Upper Second Class degree in English Literature from Kingston University. It feels like so long ago that I put on that cap and gown, shook someone’s hand and became a graduate after 3 years of hard work. Then that was that it was done and I was launched into the ‘real world’. So, here I am a year later and reflecting on what it’s been like to be a graduate. It’s been a very weird year and after uni a pretty big come down I think. I’ve written about post uni depression but I’ve also had some great times. So, here’s 10 things I’ve realised in the past year.

It’s ok if you don’t know what you’re doing.

Everyone seems like they’ve got it together with Master’s degrees or travelling or jobs in the city. I had a job but still felt like I was drowning. I had no idea what I was doing. This wasn’t an essay I could logically put together and get a first on, this was real life. One year later and I’m only just working out what I really want to do because I’ve had experience! Just try things out, don’t feel like you need to know everything as soon as you have that bit of paper.

Most people don’t care what grade you got.

I was embarrassed, that’s right embarrassed when I told people I got a 2:1. I’d always slip in I was only 3% off of a First Class because I’m a perfectionist. Admitting I got a 2:1 meant I wasn’t perfect. The thing is, I’ve never been asked what grade I got, not once. The fact I got a degree was enough for all of my jobs. Some will want specific grades, but from most of my friends, they haven’t been asked either!

£2.50 double vodkas were a blessing.

I wasn’t a big drinker at uni, I didn’t go out all the time. That said, when I go out now I hate paying normal prices for drinks, almost £5 for a double vodka? Blergh.

Sometimes friendships aren’t meant to last forever.

I’m a firm believer that some people are meant to be in your life and leave. I had some friends in uni and we had great times before we drifted apart or the friendship broke down. I’m forever grateful for the memories though.

Life is going to change.

People move, get jobs, some get married, others will have children soon. Life is changing and going so fast and sometimes it is a little overwhelming and that’s ok. Take a moment and just appreciate the small things.

Sometimes you’re going to wonder if it was all worth it.

Getting a job, or a job that you’re passionate about after graduating is hard. It’s taken me a whole year to work out what I enjoy in a working environment. There’ll be late nights and possibly some jobs you don’t enjoy where you think, should I have just gone out to work? My hardest part was when I saw people buying their first homes after working since 16 and I know I’m nowhere near a deposit.

The only person judging you is yourself.

I got so worried about how other people would judge the degree I did, my grades, the fact Ali and I lived with the family. Really, the only person judging you is you. People know that taking your first steps is hard! Don’t beat yourself up!

It’s ok to ask for help.

I didn’t want to ask for help and there were times when I needed to. When I just felt nervous or worried or wanted reassurance.

You still have so much time!

You know when you’re young you have this plan? I want to be married by this time, kids by that time etc, etc. Let it go. You have so much time to do what you want to do. Take a breath and do what feels right for you!

Taking time for yourself is important.

It’s natural to want to do your best in a job, to want to see old friends, make new ones. That said, taking a bit of time for yourself is really important, I’ve talked about my top tips for self-care before, you’ll feel much better.

It’s ok to miss uni!

It was, for most of us, full of great times! Of course you’re going to miss it! That said, there are still good times to come.

Make time to see your uni friends.

My friend Joe and I try to see each other once a month, because he’s still one of my best friends!

Everyone’s Grad journey is different

It doesn’t matter if you go stright into work or travel or study! Everyone is different and so are their lives! There’s no ‘right way’ to be a graduate! Don’t feel pressured to do certain things.

It was the best time of your life…so far!

I had some times where I worried if this was it? Was I ever going to feel the way I did at uni? I had some low periods, BUT I realised that uni was only the beginning of my independence. There is so much more in life I have to look forward to and now I’m happier I’m looking forward to every exciting thing that’s going to happen!

You did something pretty amazing.

You got a degree, that’s awesome. Go you!

 

What did you learn after graduating? Let me know in the comments below!