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I think I want to be a Journalist

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It seems to me lately that everyone knows what they want to do when they leave Uni, vaguely at least. I on the other hand am one of those people who have no idea what so ever what they want to do…until today at least. Most people in Creative Writing were not impressed with the whole idea of a journalism lecture, I on the other hand was intrigued. I genuinely wondered what they could teach us in Creative Writing. 

Overall I agreed with what the lecturer said, other elements not so much. I will say though that it was the most enthusiastic I have felt in a Creative Writing lecture for quite a while now. I found something I was genuinely interested in. I’ll admit it wasn’t a sudden epiphany I’ve been toying with the idea of going into journalism for quite a while now but while I’m so close to London, why not?   

Who knows if this is something I’ll still want to do by the end of my degree? I might completely change my mind and want to go into teaching again or I might do a law conversion. I think the thing with uni is that I can try new things and not have to completely make my mind up just yet. 

What I want to be when I grow up

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You know when you’re a kid? You dream about everything you can be and there are absolutely no limits. I’ve changed my mind so many times about what I want to be my ‘proper job’. You see I want to be a musician, I want to do it more than anything in the world but in my lecture today something came to me, a thought that is now burning through my mind like a flame. I want to be a journalist, well I think I do anyway. I swear I was the only one in the lecture today who was excited by a journalism lecture, even though I didn’t particularly agree with some of the things said I’m seriously considering some work experience.

An important part of uni is trying to work out just about what you’re going to do when they throw you out eventually, you know into the big scary world. The timers ticking, I have 3 years here and then I’m supposed to work it all out. Well that’s the theory anyway…

So what am I paying for again???

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I’m writing to you from the university library. Now usually I don’t get up this early to go to the library, it’s only 9.39am, despite fighting myself to get out of bed I got to my lecture dead on time.  I then waited 20 odd minutes and the lecturer didn’t turn up. If they had emailed I wouldn’t mind but I spent 4 hours of my Sunday reading the book for this lecture and I could have spent that getting head with other work. It wouldn’t normally bother me but this is becoming constant thing, especially in Creative Writing. I honestly love Kingston so much but I’m so glad I will be majoring in literature next year (I might actually have time to write my novel. 

In light of my time at university I think it’s important because sometimes you realise you’ve picked the wrong course and I never thought this would happen to me. It’s not because Kingston it a ‘lower’ university if Oxford taught it I would probably still get frustrated. I do get angry when I realise how much I’m paying and that if the lecturers don’t turn up they still get paid. 

Despite all this I am so happy today which is very odd because I’ve had a lack of sleep. I’m hoping that this good mood continues, it probably helps that I’ll be going home on Friday and I have Ali’s birthday to organise! You’ll also be pleased to know that I’m seriously considering writing a book for freshers, I feel like I’m in the right position to give advice because I am living through it! Let me know what you think in the comments section (below). 

Getting things done

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So today was a day for getting everything sorted. I didn’t inted for this to happen but after my driving lesson was cancelled I had some time on my hands. I’ve realised I haven’t had enough time to write much lately and it’s been getting me down. After looking at the way my life has been these last few weeks I’ve decided to get organised. I still don’t especially love my halls and as much as I love spending time with some of the people here I still think it would have been better to live in Kingston Hill. 

 

So I’m getting to that point in my course now where I’m starting to understand things, maybe even attempting to get ahead. Despite all this though I’m turning the job down. I still have a lot of work to do and I want to enjoy life as a first year student, I’m going to be working the rest of my life so I’m going to enjoy my studies. That said I do want to work through the summer I hate doing nothing!! Right now I need to focus on me for once, get a good grade and get the EP recorded (oh and actually publish some decent blog posts, sorry guys!). 

 

Thanks for reading again! 

Chloe 🙂 

Making Decisions

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After being at uni nearly a month I’ve made a big decision, I’m dropping Creative Writing as soon as possible. I thought that I wanted to be on the course and I don’t, I don’t feel like I’m getting what I wanted out of the course and rather than being super creative I’m noticing a lack of creativity.

When I was deciding I thought I wanted something creative to go with the English Lit course, but I’m finding my self loving English Lit and struggling along with Creative Writing. I’m losing my passion, which is something I never wanted to do. It can get a bit lonely when other people are getting great feedback and ideas and I just feel stuck all the time.

So now I’m making the right steps to leave the course either by transferring now or next year. I just want to be taking something I’m passionate about and right now Creative Writing isn’t it. These decisions aren’t easy but I’m really hoping I’m making the right decision.

Domestic Goddess…or not.

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Today was a day to get out of bed and get things done in my room, cleaning, organising etc. Today was also a day where I rolled out of bed at 1pm. Needless to say I didn’t get much done, after showering and sorting out my washing it was nearly 3pm. The closest I got to being a Domestic Goddess was washing my clothes and even that was a bit of trouble…long story short I ended up phoning both my Mum and Nanna on advice about how to dry my clothes with a broken heater. My clothes are now hanging up in Bekkie’s super hot room hopefully drying before I have to pick them up tomorrow.

One day I might get the hang of this girl thing though…

The first night out, nerves as well!!

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The thought of going out has been playing on my mind now for about a month. Bekkie and I had discussed going to cheese night this weekend but when we came to discussing it I felt awful. I’d hardly slept due to noise in the flat/building, I was exhausted and ended up bursting into tears over absolutely nothing and so we decided that we’d go home have a nap and go from there.  After talking to my tutor I was starting to feel better and ended up sleeping for 3 hours when I got back, after a bite to eat I was ready to give it a go.

I was stressed I wont lie, I’d never properly done this before well not in clubs anyway. We ended up going with my flatmate Christie and some other friends and headed to the pub first, which had now evolved to a club atmosphere. We ordered some drinks and were getting ready to head into the club opposite. The problem however was the boys. Now we’re a group of fairly attractive girls so it wasn’t unheard of for boys to try and dance with us, I however made sure they wouldn’t get the wrong idea. Normally if they see a ring on your finger (even if it you buy it yourself, make it look like an engagement ring) most of the time it will work tonight it didn’t. Some of the guys were nice and just looking to chat  (well I thought so) some were complete idiots and would not take no for an answer especially the old ones who pretended they were in their twenties. You’re not fooling anyone, give up old men who are double my age.

Despite the fun however I started feeling really poorly and my kidneys started to ache. After not being back long I didn’t want to push it and Bekkie didn’t feel like the club either. So we left and went to McDonalds. So it might not have been a wild night but I tried.

I’ll try again next time 😉

A job, a hair cut and ice cream!

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Today was a very good day… I got the job! The money is very good and I have more info to look into it I’m so excited it was a total confidence boost 😀 Other than that after an uncomfortable trip to the hairdressers I finally got my hair cut with a God of a hairdresser. Rush in Kingston are the est salon I’ve ever been to!  I got to have tea, a head massage, chocolates and oh yeah 25% off for being a student!! After that Bekkie and I headed to an ice cream bar for celebrations then ran for a bus home (just the normal thing between Becks and I!). Today has been pretty good with only a few hiccups (I feel more confident now I’ve styled my hair myself) hopefully I have my first night out tomorrow, lets see what happens!

Feeling like me again.

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Bekks and I in the studio in one of my hyperactive moments while Ali was hard at work.

Today was a day where I finally went ‘back to work’. Ok so it isn’t a paid job and I don’t have to do it but still. I finally went back into the studio to start recording No People Clubs EP!!! It was long, tiring and meant that I had to deal with a lot of emotions but I feel so much better after doing it. Although today didn’t quite start out like that, uni was a bit of a night and so was the afternoon of ‘freedom’. I haven’t been sleeping much so a 9am start wasn’t top of my list of things to do today especially when it is pissing down with rain. Today has also been a very up and down experience in terms of my moods (as have the last few days. I love uni and then I hate it and my mind is arguing with itself every five minutes about something and it gets a little bit exhausting. I think that if I hadn’t have recorded today I wouldn’t have been able to release anything, I needed something else to concentrate on that just wasn’t to do with uni stuff. It definitely worked because for the first time in over a month I was able to write a review again, my confidence just appeared and although its 1am I feel ALIVE. I feel ready to write and perform music again, I feel ready to let go of the hurt that was still inside me from home and I feel ready to write properly and just hold out on the academics until second year (when I actually get to CHOOSE what I want to study).

 

There was one other little thing that may have helped today and that’s a few phone calls one from my amazing Grampey who never ever fails to make me feel better. What did he do you may ask? He simply asked me about my day and told me about his, it’s little things like that I love and miss the most and the thought of going home for a few days at the end of the month makes me so damn excited! The other phone call was from my Mum as part of our daily phone calling it always makes me feel better and she managed to calm me down after a run in with a nightmare hairdresser (thankfully all my hair is okay but I will NEVER be going back to that place again!). You’ll already have guessed Ali and Bekkie played a major part in today too. 

So really everyone I just wanted to write this to let you know that I’m doing ok! Well I will be anyway, days like this give me hope. 

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Ali hard at work

Interview time!!

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Today I attempted to get back into the world of work by going to an interview for a student job with the uni. This will only be a short post as I don’t have much going on right now (especially after yesterday). I thought I was going to freak out while I was waiting eagerly outside the interview room, I haven’t worked for a good few months and haven’t had a formal interview in nearly two years. I think it went ok and even if it didn’t I can re apply next year now I know I can handle it.

Wish me luck!