Why having an alcohol-free freshers week is absolutely fine.

It’s that time of year again, 18 year olds (and older) have got their grades and are heading to university. While some of us chose to move away from home, others might be sticking around but commuting. Freshers week has a reputation as an absolutely crazy 7 day party where everyone spends the majority of the time drunk. But what if you don’t drink?

Whenever I meet new students I’m always answering questions by nervous people who either don’t drink or don’t like clubbing. It’s true most university events are surrounded by alcohol, club nights or pub crawls but believe it or not it’s still possible to have a great time without drinking. If you’ve been following my blog since I started you’ll know that I hardly drank at all in my first year and went out to a club a grand total of two times, I did drink I’d usually end up wasted at pre drinks because I was so anxious about going out and I’d panic drink until I couldn’t go. In my second year I started going out with friends at least once a month because I had people I finally felt comfortable enough around and got the party bug. Fast forward to this year and I can’t go clubbing even if I wanted to because of my spine and if I want to drink I can’t take any pain medication for two days, which would you decide?
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After my Freshers Ball, sober but smiling. 

People choose not to drink for a load of reasons medical, religious, or simply not wanting to. I remember being a fresher and feeling so nervous and like I had to drink if I went anywhere. I was so desperate to make friends and not be alone but I really do regret it. When I’m anxious or depressed, alcohol is not my friend, on more than one occasion I’ve gone out drinking when feeling like that and ended up crying when I got home, because I wasn’t feeling well and plus, alcohol is a depressant. Now I’m happier and have better mental health I can usually gage if I should have a drink or not.

What about you guys though? I’m going to give you some clichè advice, just be yourself. Starting uni is a whole new chapter in your life and for me it was a chance to start over and be who I wanted, it took a little longer but I’m pretty happy with who I carved out here. You’re a great person and I’ll bet you anything there is someone close to you feeling just as nervous and isn’t keen on getting wasted. If you’re in a new place with completely new people you have a right to not want to get hammered and a lot of people understand. There are people who like that kind of thing but if you’re not one of them it looks incredibly daunting.

If you’re not drinking there are so many benefits no hangover in the morning, you have more money, more time to go and do cool things (like exploring your new place!) and work out what you want. There’s also no problem with wanting to go out and try it too, that’s what uni is all about!

I completely understand how daunting starting uni is and sometimes I still feel overwhelmed…and I’m a third year! If anyone wants any tips, tricks or just a chat feel free to comment, email or tweet me!

Have a great Freshers week folks!

Turning 21 – What a birthday!

I’m writing this on what is the last night I am celebrating turning 21! It’s been a great few weeks, kicking off with my trip to Amsterdam earlier this month with the girls, followed by a celebration with my Dad’s side of the family Tuesday, seeing Lucy and my baby girl Lexi in the day on Wednesday and my Little Mermaid themed party with my Mum’s side of the family in the afternoon evening.

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Thursday was pretty average for birthday week with band practice and waiting up with Ali to see in my 21st birthday and finally getting my Ron Pop figure! I woke up to hugs, a load of Facebook messages and texts, to get ready for my Mum coming. I always need to see my parents on my birthday, it’s like you know they’re responsible for me being in the world at all so it’s only right that I see them. For my first present I received a special hardback anniversary edition of To Kill a Mockingbird, one of my favourite books.

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We headed into town for some shopping and of course a cocktail, where I also got a free shot for my birthday! After I had to go and get my fox onesie I’d had my eyes on for a week so that I could spend my hangover day in style… I knew I’d have a messy night out, before being met by Ali….with more Pops! Dumbledore and Snape!! I was also met by Joe later with a copy of Y the last man (you should totally check it out) and an incredible colouring book. I really couldn’t wait to meet up with Dad and Summer too 🙂

When they finally got here after my sister was let out of school I was met with this beauty..

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Yup, this was handmade by my sister as my birthday cake. I got some amazing presents, a Pandora ring I’ve wanted for ages, a new Dolphin charm, mug, wine glass (for vodka, obviously) and I got taken out to dinner with my family, Ali and Joe came along too (with Kermit). I love my family so much and just being with them on my birthday was so special and I think we have a new family picture too!

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I’ve had cards from so many people too, including Eleanor and Maisha in New Zealand! My family, Ali’s family, friends, nearly 100 messages on Facebook and then I got a huge surprise when I went to the pub. I couldn’t believe that over 20 people turned up to celebrate with me, friends from all across my life and I was so overwhelmed by it all. I even got more gifts! A Voldemort Pop from Ben and Abbie, a Jessica Rabbit Pop from Laura (because she looks like me!), a lovely quote to go on my wall and earrings from Dani, a book of positive quotes from Aline and Lush stuff from Amy and Peter. I think you can tell from my smile in the pictures how happy I was.

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And those are just some of the pictures! I just felt so loved all day and it’s something I’ll cherish forever. I also felt loved when Ali took me home and put me in my fox onesie before letting me sleep off the mound of drinks that people had bought me! Luckily for me I also woke up with only a slight headache. Win!

Today was the last part of my celebrations as Ali’s Sister, Mum, her boyfriend came for lunch, bringing with them more presents. From Ali’s Mum and her boyfriend I received a MAC ‘look in a box’ with a lipstick, lip gloss and liner and from Ali’s sister a beautiful copy of Alice in Wonderland, a beautiful novel I’ve never had the chance to read.

I’m a little sad that it’s all over now but I have this overwhelming love and feeling of awe at how many people took time out of their day to say happy birthday, send a message, see me or anything else. Thank you to each and every one of you, I think this has to have been the best birthday ever. Who knows what this year is going to bring but I really, really hope this is the start of another great chapter, oh and to top it off I now have over 1000 Twitter followers, another goal accomplished!

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Me, now 21. 

21 Things about me!

If you haven’t seen already all over my Twitter, Facebook and Instagram, today is my 21st Birthday! Yippie!! So while I’m out celebrating with friends and family I thought it would be cute/fun to write a list of 21 facts about me! Enjoy!

  1. I’ve grown up to be a little traveller 

I’ve been going abroad since I was 3 years old. So far I’ve visited Paris 5 times, various parts of greece around 8 times, Amsterdam, Spain, the USA 3 times, Italy and that’s just a few! Next up, going back to the US, Australia and New Zealand as well as other parts of europe.

2. I once broke my toe by dropping a place of Chinese on it

If that’s not a waste of food I don’t know what is.

3. Jodi Picoult told me I was a writer in person. 

It was possibly one of the best moments of my life.

4. I’ve only just watched the Star Wars Trilogy

…Yup, I’m sorry.

5. I’m shorter than I was for my 20th birthday 

Yes, really. When I broke my back, my spine lost height meaning I’m a little shorter than I was before!

6. My Mum had loaded up to do a car boot sale the night she went into labour with me. 

Yeah, she wasn’t impressed.

7. My family thought I’d be an escape artist growing up… 

I used to get through anything, reins on the pram, chairs, playpens, you name it I was out.

8. When I was three I wanted a tattoo of the kids TV show Tots TV. 

9. …I also told my parents I wanted to be a topless model at the same age, because I thought the ladies in the paper were pretty.

10. I thought INSET day was insect day… 

In the UK that’s our day off school for teacher training, before I started school I thought it meant you took insects into school to show off.

11. I have a huge Harry Potter collection 

It lives under the stairs at my parents house, in my room and in my flat. I don’t think it’s ever going to stop growing.

12. I’m a hobbit. 

That was one of my nicknames at college….it didn’t help that my boyfriend told everyone I had hairy toes -.-.

13. I was obsessed with dolphins growing up, I even got to play with them once. 

14. 18 is my favourite number.

My birthday, an even number, what’s not to love?

15. I didn’t start using make up properly until I started at university. 

Hence why I’m not a beauty blogger and get so excited when I find things now.

16. Blue is my favourite colour. 

Seriously if I could I’d have blue everything, headphones, car, phone, if there’s ever a choice most of the time it’ll be blue.

17. I love strawberry flavoured things but hate eating real strawberries. 

I’m a bit weird.

18. Pasta is the best staple food there is and if you don’t believe that you are wrong. 

I could eat pasta every day and still be in love with it, cheese is a great topper.

19. My first ever concert was The Spice Girls Winter Tour in 1999

Victoria Beckham smiled and waved at me, it was the best moment of my 5 year old life.

20. I’m pretty handy with my toes

I can pick almost anything up with my toes, it’s a pretty cool skill to have.

21. It’s one of my goals in life to learn sign language

I honestly think it’s one of the most beautiful languages in the world

Book Review: Suicide Notes From Beautiful Girls – Lynn Weingarten

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‘It was like being in love, but more…And now, one year later , Delia is dead. 

I love a good suspense novel, after glancing at this I had to get it, because it just sounded too damn good. June and Delia were best friends, closer than sisters, until they grew apart, one night Delia dies but June knows that things don’t quite add up. They say it was suicide, but June is convinced it’s murder and will go to any lengths to find out the truth about her best friend.

This is the best kind of thriller, once you think you know what’s going to happen a twist comes out of nowhere and you’re floored and devouring the book to find out what happened. I give you fair warning Suicide Notes From Beautiful Girls will keep you up all hours of the night not only reading it but also trying to work out what really happened, was it suicide? Did someone have a grudge against her to the point of murder? It helps that Delia is a character who is very unpredictable and June knows it.

I thought the character of June was well written, there is really hurt, pain and confusion that you can feel as you read the book. I felt that she was very real to the reader, with her own feelings and problems outside her search for Delia. I found the book similar to Far From You but in a good way because both have completely different characters and endings. If you like this novel that is another one to check out later.

There are a lot of suspects in this novel, people who could have murdered her and it drove me half crazy as I came up with theories for each and every one of them, not once did I get to the truth. The fact that I never got it but the ending was so well planned really made me amazed at Weingarten’s talent as an author, I think she is definitely one to watch in YA literature and I wouldn’t be surprised if this made a great film later on. I saw that because this would make a much better film plot than Gone Girl ever did.

Of course I’m going to give this review 5 stars *****!!! This really is a brilliant book and I’m so pleased my book club chose this as the novel to read for this month, it’s brilliant. I’m now planning to read the rest of Weingarten’s novels and hope they are just as addictive and satisfying as Suicide Notes from Beautiful Girls. I hope you all enjoy and please let me know your thoughts. Have you read any other Weingarten novels? Or have you read Suicide Notes from Beautiful Girls already? As always let me know in the comments!

The Queen’s not the only one with two birthdays

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For the past two days I have been spoilt by my family. Because there is so many of them and my flat is more than a little cosy I decided to come home and visit both grandparents to see everyone and celebrate my 21st a few days early.

I spent yesterday in town with my sister, getting my hair cut and spending more than a little on the new H&M beauty range (but more in that in another blog post). Later I popped to see my Dads family for presents and cake.

Today I was on the move again (although my spine really has been protesting), to meet one of my oldest friends and beautiful goddaughter to exchange birthday presents. From Lucy and Lexi I received a necklace of Hermione’s wand and a Harley Quinn graphic novel. I had so much fun with a little girl who melts my heart every time and a great friend in her Mum.

Now, there have been whispers and mentions of surprises all week. I was left at home while my Mum went ahead to my grandparents house, only to arrive and find this…

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A little family party with a Little Mermaid theme, my favourite princess as a kid!! A badass cake, plates, customised banners, pictures of me growing up! I couldn’t have asked for more, my Mum really outdid her surprises this time! I felt like a kid again and it was obvious how much time and effort had gone into this and all for me!

I’ve been thoroughly spoilt in terms of gifts as well and I’m so happy with all of them, a new pandora necklace and charm, some little mermaid goodies and  another charm for my Pandora bracelet. I can’t believe I feel this loved and it’s not even my birthday. Oh and we had a brilliant pizza party too thanks to Nanna and Gramps who ordered pizza for everyone!

I think this is going to be a very good week! ❤

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Milestones

I’ve been thinking lately about milestones. I don’t know what it was exactly but I’m guessing it’s a combination of turning 21 (which I don’t understand why it’s a big deal in the UK), seeing more and more of the people I went to school with having children and getting engaged and a lot of my other friends graduating, starting careers and all that jazz. To put it simply milestones freak me out, I’m sure they do for most people. You’re supposed to do this, do that at a certain age, a certain time. For girls there’s a choice between being a mother and being a career woman, because we’re told we can’t have it all.

In some ways I’m lucky, I found the love of my life when I was 13 years old and we live together. Now we’re more than happy together, we’re both doing degrees we love and have careers that we want, but for everyone else it’s not enough. Everyone asks me when we’ll get married, when we’ll have a baby (never if). I just feel a bit stuck and part of that is because I am a woman. Ali NEVER gets asked when he’ll be a father, he’s asked about his job and what he’s going to do for work, it’s all pretty frustrating. I know that I’m an intelligent woman and I have big aspirations, so why do people ask about these ‘traditional’ things.

I’m in no way saying that people my age shouldn’t be married or have children, most of the women in my family had babies by the time they were my age and they’ve all taught me so much. My best friend became a mother at 17 and she’s one of the most awesome ones I know.The thing is my dream right now is walking across that stage to pick up my degree, being able to treat myself with money I’ve earnt and being happy. I will have children, I’d love to be a mum at some point but I wish people would understand there is so much more to me than the fact I can grow a human. I liked this picture below, it definitely made me smile.

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This isn’t an anti-children post, which is how some will read it, it’s just a frustration that sometimes I’m judged by these milestones when I have other amazing things going on. I hate that I have to think about body clocks and all that crap when I’m trying to plan things out about where I want to be in my life, because I’ve been bombarded with media listing risks and problems. Like I said why am I even thinking about this as a twenty year old!

I appreciate that this post might not make much sense, I don’t even know if it does to me, but I can’t be the only one who feels like this. Who knows how I’ll feel in a month, a year or ten but I just want it to be on my own terms, not because of supposed milestones and other people’s ideas of what happiness is.

Anxiety, I haven’t missed you.

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One swipe to my stomach, a blow to my head, anxiety is a bigger heavyweight than any boxer. In comparison the last few weeks have been blissful when I only have lows to think about, anxiety tries to eat me alive and makes my depression worse. It may shock you to find out that I’ve actually had a pretty good weekend with good company and a lot of productivity. I’ve finally got most of the vocals for the album recorded in the past two days  and I’ve been able to spend time with Ali and before that a great time with Joe.

I have so many good things to look forward to this week for my birthday and the next few weeks are all exciting but my anxious brain is starting to freak out. I’m starting to stress about if I’ve done enough reading over the summer, if I’ve done enough research, will I be ok with my classes? Will I get the first class degree I’ve dreamed about? Will my spine recover as it should? Will I be good enough to run the horse riding society? Will the band take off this year before Rhys has to go back to America at the end of the academic year? All these thoughts and panics are swirling around in my brain, triggered by one thing that I’m anxious about this week.

I’m hoping that it’ll start to go away after a good night’s sleep, sometimes that works. I think that my biggest fear is that I’ll be sick on my birthday the way I was on my sixteenth birthday. I had a panic attack at my party and couldn’t handle all the people being around me, a few days later I posed for pictures desperately wanting to feel ‘normal’ and relaxed rather than fighting a battle with myself. I’m not at that level but it’s something I’ll never forget. Logically, I know that my body is tired and I’ve been busy which is probably why I’m getting so anxious as well as being a little nervous about my third year.

I needed to get all of this out of my head and onto a page and, usually, I’m lucky enough to speak to people who have felt like this before. With Anxiety and Depression it’s nice to know that you’re not alone in how you feel and knowing that other people have good days and bad days too. Hopefully this will pass sooner rather than later and it’ll be a distant memory by my birthday at the end of the week.

I have a love hate relationship with recording

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I have wanted to get an EP/ album out for what feels like forever and after the past few years being very up and down I’ve finally got a great band and decent songs, the only thing that stands in the way of a release is recording vocals. Hm. There is some definite love and definite hate when it comes to me recording vocals. For a long time I was so anxious and wound up that trying to record was a nightmare, I was a nightmare. I’d get so worked up that I’d cry or be sick because I was so nervous and nothing came out sounding how I wanted it to. I’ve definitely grown a lot in terms of my music in the past year and Ali’s finally found ways to help me relax enough to get things done…even if that includes recording in my simpsons pj’s in the middle of the day. Hey what works, works!

I still have another long day of recording ahead tomorrow, with two songs down we have another four to go but so far it is sounding the best it ever has and I’m in a good mindset about it. So hopefully by christmas I can give you all a link and you can go and download the EP! Eeeeeek! For now though if you haven’t go and like our facebook page! You don’t even have to go far because I’ve added a box on my blog if you look to the right and scroll down! See, No People Club will take over the world!

As always thank you for taking the time to catch up with my blog and if you haven’t already I’ve just posted a post about my recent trip to Amsterdam. As always I’d love to hear your thoughts!

Amsterdam 2015 – Laughs, Beauty and Best Friends

Hello to all my lovely followers! I’m back from Amsterdam and I’ve finally gotten enough sleep to write coherent sentences! After spending the past few days in Amsterdam I can say that not only have I had a nice break but I’ve made some incredible memories with two of my best friends Daniela and Amy. This post will have a lot of pictures and a LOT of laughs because everything just seemed to happen to us!

After setting off on Sunday night we were all excited and got our back seat on the coach, driving through the night everything seemed to be going smoothly that was until we got onto the ferry. For well after midnight it was packed with people and the only space we could find was next to a man with quite an odd smell, combine that with a very rocky ship I wasn’t feeling all too well but before too long we could get back on to the coach where I thought I’d get a few hours sleep….not so much. I finally got to a point where I was starting to doze off when I could hear shouting through my headphones and someone threatening to ‘punch someone in the nose’. While most people were a bit nervous about this I was more irritated than anything, I mean come on it was nearly 5am in France, calm yourselves! A lovely man with some seriously impressive ink managed to try and calm things down and alert the driver, who had to pull up in the middle of nowhere to call the doctor and the police. We were stuck like that for an hour and a half while two people were taken off of the coach and sorted out, delaying our arrival.

Eventually we arrived to a drizzly Amsterdam and got the tram into the city centre where we saw our first sights of the city, although I have to admit after not having slept I didn’t take much in apart from the fact someone on the coach had smeared my new bag with chewing gum. Nice. We asked for directions to our hotel and were told it was simple to find but apparently not. We must have looked a sight the three off us half awake wandering around the streets of Amsterdam with our luggage looking incresingly confused. We found it eventually but had another 2 hours until we could get into our room so we did what any other group of girls in their twenties would do…we went into the Sex Museum. Well it was certainly interesting and some of the pictures on the walls were more than a little terrifying…my innocence has forever been destroyed. 11930889_10154225071528206_8684867348378646063_o

One of our first sights of Amsterdam, although taken when it wasn’t raining! 

We wandered around taking in the city and trying to get an idea of where everything is before finally being able to take a nap (after the girls had decorated the room in balloons and banners for my birthday because they’re adorable) in the room before hitting the town in the evening. The thing you have to know about Amsterdam is there are very different parts and two main tourist areas…we unknowingly booked our hotel on the partying and red light district side rather than the cute Vondelpark side, oops. I’ve never seen anything like the red light district and if I’m honest I felt more than a little bit uncomfortable. The men didn’t only look at the women in the windows but girls like us too who were simply in jeans and jumpers. That said there was a little shock to my system as apparently geek glasses are now sexy with most of the women in shop windows wearing glasses that looked a lot like my glasses I wear to help me see, I hoped no one would get any ideas!  11930969_10154221642183206_4169589696280979323_o

It may have been a cloudy day but you couldn’t help but see Amsterdam’s beauty 

We had a pretty early night with plans for a fully packed day the next morning. We had to be up and out of the room by 8am if we wanted a chance at getting in the Anne Frank house without queueing for two hours. I’ve wanted to visit the house since I was really young and so I was more than a little bit excited to visit and standing in the slightly chilly morning air and desperately trying to connect to wifi in the queue was a small price to pay.

We got in after waiting for around an hour and a half and I’ve seen nothing like it. I’d imagined Anne and the world she paints with her diary countless times but nothing could have prepared me for it, the rooms were so small. Everyone was silent as they walked through and just tried to take it in. There were so many moments when I just felt my heart fall, seeing Anne’s pictures on the wall, the bookcase that concealed them and most of all her diary. Seeing the diary made me want to just sit and look at it for hours. I think the most heartbreaking part was watching the videos of Otto that played every now and again. His pain at what he had lost just went straight to my heart.  I couldn’t walk past the central station after that without remembering how he waited there for his daughters who never came home.

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After we purchased our tickets for the Van Gogh museum the next day before I headed back to the hotel to rest for a little bit because my back wasn’t feeling especially great. The girls knew that I was struggling a little bit and while I took a nap they walked around and bought me back a bar of chocolate. Later in the evening, Amy had a headache so Dani and I went out so she could have a sleep and we’d text her a bit later on to meet up. Well we did text her but all didn’t go as much to plan as we’d thought. Our safe in the room had gone weird and so Dani and I rushed back to the room where the staff were absolutely useless, luckily our passports weren’t left in there! Eventually we all did go out for a wander around and to buy some souvenirs.

The final day was definitely the best. The sun finally came out and the girls had booked me a surprise for my birthday we were going on a cruise of the city! Although what we didn’t know until just before is that the cruise we had been sold was a lovers cruise! So we had a bit of a lie in before walking down to get our boat. The only seats were near an old german couple, the man was hilarious talking to us about anything to do with London, telling us they lived in a town of lesbians which was good but crazy and then drawing little cartoons of us to keep…oh and telling me I had beautiful teeth, like a rabbit. We couldn’t stop laughing and it wasn’t until we got off the boat that we realised that he thought we were lesbians on the lovers cruise!

The rest of the day was spent going to the Van Gogh museum which was a dream as he is one of my all time favourite artists. I felt so emotional seeing his paintings, reading his letters and reading about his battles with mental health. He was a truly incredible man. I went a little nuts in the gift shop and was mesmerised by all the artwork on display. After we wandered to Vondel Park and was almost killed by cyclists and relaxed in the sunshine before heading to the incredible Hard Rock cafe for happy hour and dinner and we were even given a free drink for my birthday!

Even the trip back was great despite being on a coach for 12 hours, we made some wonderful friends on the way back who I hope to stay in touch with. Amsterdam was incredible and I have two amazing friends who I got to share it with who spoilt me rotten. It’s something I’m going to remember forever and I think Amsterdam is always going to have a special place in my heart.

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Book Review: We Are Completely Beside Ourselves – Karen Joy Fowler

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‘In most families, there is a favourite child…I was our mother’s favourite child’

The story follows Rosemary throughout her life, although on her father’s advice it’s best to start with the middle of the story, and so she does. In the middle of the story it’s 1996 and Rosemary is in college, it’s been years since her sister Fern disappeared completely and she’s done her best to make sure no one even finds out she existed. Fern is not spoken about at home, no pictures hang on the wall, but Rosemary is haunted by the sister she just can’t forget and after being given her mother’s journals she is reminded that she can never really escape her past.

I was looking forward to reading this one because it had a lot of hype surrounding it. The quotes on the front were saying how ‘irresistible’ it was and that the twist was the ‘best in years’. Now I’m a sucker for a good twist and I won’t say that it’s a bad one,it’s just not great. The twist takes over the whole novel, meaning that not only is it hard to review but it’s also kind of boring. There is also the issue of how the novel weaves in and out of different times, at points it’s hard to remember what point of the story it is and where the characters are at this point.

There does seem to be an underlying ethical issue which kind of takes over the entire book, it’s an interesting argument and I definitely think twice about my shopping habits as a result of reading it, but it gets a little boring after a while. While I agree with the idea that is being put across, I also got bored of this ethical issue being shoved in my face constantly while I was trying to read and get involved with the characters.

I don’t know if it’s intentional but Fowler has made a lot of the characters distant and unloveable. From the beginning there was something I didn’t like about the family dynamic and something I really didn’t trust about Rosemary. The descriptions of her father went from one extreme to the other at one point he is a kind and caring man, the other he’s very strange and easy to hate. I felt like I couldn’t relate to any of the characters that much, which is upsetting because they were well written.

I’ve given this three stars ***, although it wasn’t badly written the ‘twists and turns’ were all just very underwhelming. At times it felt like the novel was building to something fantastic only to be let down, it seemed to me that by the end of the novel Fowler has just run out of steam and come up with a safe ending, which was quite boring to me. I don’t think this was a book for me but I know other people who I think would enjoy it, it’s possibly because when I read the word ‘twist’ I think it’s going to be earth shattering, which unfortunately this twist was not.