Ahh I’m finally back on the laptop and ready to write for you all. The last few days I’ve been feeling pretty low, as you can imagine I don’t get prior warning that I’m going to hit a low. With the tiredness, stress of assignments, stress of flat hunting and being alone a lot it’s easy now to see why I’ve been so down. I haven’t felt like writing lately, or doing much. I’ve focused on my work and tried to carry on with the things I have to do, and everything else was kind of just left.
I have so much going for me at the moment and there is so much going on that even though I’m happy it can get too much and turn into something that is too much. I hate my lows and I feel like I let a lot of people down when they happen, especially when they’re up and down like they have been lately. The important thing is that I’m trying and I’m proud of myself for that at least. I’ve been able to just say when I need to take a step back and look after myself, well I’m trying anyway.
These are the king of things that make me carry on and try to raise awareness of mental health. As I said in my presentation it’s all about good days and bad days and how you deal with each. So the last few days have been tough, but I’m ok. I have supportive friends and family and I wont let this beat me. I’m also trying to trust doctors again, although this wont be easy because I’ve had a lot of bad experiences with them before, telling me things that weren’t true or not helping me.
I know this is a bit of a weird post but I don’t know what else to write about today, hopefully things will start being sorted tomorrow and I can go back for my Easter holidays on Thursday and finally relax and sleep.