What Do You Do For Fun? 23 and ‘Boring’

I was recently asked what I do for fun, what my hobbies are. I replied as I always do I blog, I read a lot and I write. People don’t really believe me when I say that’s what I do for fun. Don’t you go out? Don’t you drink etc, etc. That’s usually how it goes. So sometimes I think about it, am I boring for my age?

I’ve never been one for regularly going out to clubs and partying. When I was a teenager I went to house parties, hosted by my boyfriend. When I was in college I didn’t go out drinking still, only to a few house parties. In my first six months at university, I went out to a club grand total of two times the first I was on the night bus crying by midnight because I had an anxiety attack. The second time I came home early. In Second year I’d get drunk so I wasn’t anxious and go out with friends. In Third year I didn’t go out at all. Then I graduated and became even more comfortable with my own life.

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You might follow me on Instagram and think, hang on I’ve seen pictures of you out with friends. I do go, occasionally. Once a month my friends and I try and go out for drinks or I might go to see or do something. For a long time, I got hung up on the fact I didn’t feel ‘normal’, I felt ‘boring’. I had this idea in my head of what I was meant to be doing.

There is a pressure I think. Travel the world, but save money. Go out and party, but spend all your time networking and building a career. Have fun, but think seriously about your future, you only get one chance. All of these things going through your mind.

The thing is, I like staying at home and reading books or writing. Blogging makes me happy. Spending time on my craft, reading a really good book, having lie-ins or just chatting with my boyfriend is a good weekend. I like going out and seeing and doing too but I don’t feel like I’m missing out by not going out every weekend.

I thought, for a long time, the worst someone could call me was boring. I was fun right?  I was entertaining? People would want to hang out with me? I tormented myself worrying about this shit. Slowly, I’m working towards not caring about that stuff, about doing my own thing and what makes me happy. And, for me, that’s what’s important doing things I love to do rather than what everyone else is doing.

I want to hear from my lovely readers! Do you ever feel like you’re not doing ‘what you should’ or a bit boring? Do you ever feel under pressure to be or act a certain way because of your age? Let me know your thoughts in the comments below!

Sunday 7 – 7 Things I’ve Learnt Since Breaking My Spine

I’ve been feeling fairly emotional in the last few weeks about today. It’s been one year since breaking my spine and I just feel kind of weird about it. I broke down in tears after a particularly bad pain day, because I’m still in all this pain a year later. I just felt so fed up but then I had a hug with Ali and he reminded me of what I’ve been saying to myself for the past 12 months. I may be in pain but I’m still here and I’m still walking. What happened to me was bad enough but it could have been a lot worse! I’ve also really grown as a person in the past year, my opinion on life has changed and I’m truly grateful. I wouldn’t go as far as saying that I’m glad it happened, it changed a lot and I didn’t have the best year BUT I am really proud of myself, how I’ve reacted and what I’ve learnt.

You can have all the ridged plans you want, but life doesn’t work that way.

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Before the accident, I had a plan of how my life would go and it would go that way. I was like I’ll graduate then and I’ll go straight to my masters, then my Phd. I’ll have a house by this time, a dog, a child, another child, I WILL HAVE CONTROL. I learnt after the accident that life can throw ANYTHING at you, there was a point where I physically couldn’t walk. Of course, I didn’t plan that, no one plans almost losing the ability to walk. It made me realise that I can’t have this idea of infinite control, so I’ve let go a little. Things will happen as they do, I only have so much control.

Stop being so hard on yourself! 

Recovery was hard, super hard. I constantly get told by my physiotherapists, pain specialists, lecturers, family, Ali that I need to stop being so hard on myself. They’d remind me all the time this wasn’t a small break, this was a huge part of my body trying to fix itself. So what if I put on weight, if I didn’t get the top grade in my class. I realised striving to be great is good but I don’t have to be perfect all the time.

The human body is a beautiful and amazing thing.

For a long time after the accident and sometimes still now I resented my body. I hated that it had broken in such a simple fall, I hated the stretch marks that had bloomed all over my thighs, I hated the fact people commented on how much weight I’d put on and I hated that I didn’t fit into any of my clothes. I had a realisation at a point that I just thought my body has been doing so much work. It’s literally been healing the main pillar in my body that hold everything together, that’s amazing.

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When you’re sick enough, you can cope with your hatred of needles/hospitals/ claustrophobia. 

I still hate needles, I will always hate needles BUT when you’re sick enough (like when I was in the hospital earlier in the year) you get on with it. I still don’t like hospitals (who does) but now it’s just another place I have to go sometimes. I won’t lie having my MRI and CT scans were pretty nerve wracking and claustrophobic but the people running them understood that. Basically you can get through a lot more than you think you can.

The gym is better than any therapy session and any religion. 

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If you’d have asked me a year ago about loving the gym I would have laughed at you, now I’m stressed when I CAN’T go. The gym is a love and an obsession and I can’t wait to get back into routine and slowly keep building my muscles and be in so much better shape than I was a year ago.

It’s ok to have days where it all feels like too much. 

You’re only human, you need these days, it’s okay!

The people who stick around are the ones that are meant to be there. 

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My relationships changed a lot after the accident, I lost a lot of people and I gained some others. More than anything I learnt that the people that are meant to be there will be. I also learnt that some people are in your life for a certain amount of time and that’s okay too. I’m a firm believer in everything happens for a reason.

Sunday Seven: Stand Out Concerts

 

Today I took my sister to see Little Mix (her christmas present from me). The concert was full of little girls, decked head to toe in Little Mix clothes, singing their hearts out and dancing to every single song. It really took me back, when I was growing up concerts were a big thing for me and my Mum, we went to a lot of concerts. I remember Mum sitting on the phone trying to get tickets to this concert or that (this was the early ’00, no internet shopping!). So as I’ve grown up and gotten into my own music I’ve gone to concerts as much as possible, spending my money on nights at venues rather than nights out. So here are just 7 of the amazing concerts that really stood out in my mind. No judging!

Spice Girls – 1999 

Way back in ’99 (yes I’m that old), my Mum, my pregnant Aunt and I went to Earls Court to watch the Spice Girls. I was obsessed with them from the age of 2 and the obsession carried on, even now I’m watching the rumors of a 20th reunion tour like a hawk. At the age of 4 it was the best day of my life, I ended up being on the TV filming (well the huge banner I made way anyway) and Victoria Beckham (then Adams) waved at me, putting me in serious doubt about who my favourite Spice Girl was. What a choice for little Chloe to make!

Busted – 2006 

Between going to the Spice Girls and going to Busted I’d gone to a few more concerts but this was the first one with guitars. REAL GUITARS. People won’t call Busted a band, that’s fine, but to me they played guitars which was the coolest thing. I also got to see Mcfly as the support act before they were a thing which was really cool. Unfortunately we didn’t know at the time I had Glandular Fever. I was really sick and only made it through about 2 songs before falling asleep on my feet and having to be taken home by Mum and Dad.

Paramore – 2010 

Ah, my first concert that I went to without my Mum. Ali and I got tickets to go and see Paramore for the first time at the O2. Of course I fell in love, I fell in love with the band dynamic, the way five people came to be one and just rocked out. It was the first time I thought, yeah, I could do this band thing. I’d always wanted to perform but there was something about this concert, at a time where I was really struggling in my final year at school, and this just gave me hope and joy.

Deaf Havana – 2013 

The first time I got to meet a band that I really loved. I moved into halls on the Friday, explored and got used to things on the Saturday and missed the welcome BBQ to go and see a band…sounds like me. It was amazing to go to a record store, watch a small and intimate set and then meet a band I’d admired for years. The first of many in store meet and greets.

Paramore – 2013

Paramore make the list again because this was a concert that was at a tough period in my life too. It was also the first time that Ali stayed at my flat in first year (not something that happened often because it was tiny). I think going to this concert gave me the push to be in a band again. I’d just started uni, my old band had broken up and I felt a little lost. I went to this show with my best friend, cried during a song and came home feeling in love with music again. Paramore will always be my favourite band. Always.

We Are the in Crowd – 2014 

Another meet and greet, I met WATIC twice in 2014 and was at the last show before they had to cancel the rest of their tour. It was so cool to just chat to these people who has been part of the soundtrack to my life and just chill with them and eat pizza before watching an absolutely incredible show. I’d seen them both acoustic and electric in the space of 24 hours, a really awesome time.

Ed Sheeran – 2015 

This might seem a little odd to be on the list. I went to see Ed at the O2 Arena, I really liked his stuff but wasn’t expecting to be blown away. It’s honestly the best pop concert I’ve ever been to. Just him, his guitar and a pedal board. I’ve never seen someone so talented on their own. It was nothing short of incredible.

I could easily fill multiple blogs with how much I love concerts and live music. In the next month alone I have 2 concerts with my sister (The Vamps and 5 Second of Summer), PVRIS with Ali and I’m hoping to book a lot more, although most of my favourite bands have either just finished touring or are currently writing/ taking a break. Roll on the next round of tours!

Tonight Alive at Koko

For the second time in 2 years I’ve been lucky enough to see Tonight Alive (an Australian band), I’m a big fan of them and slowly their coming through. When I first got into them not many people had heard of them but now they’re creeping up after playing Reading Festival this year, supporting You Me At Six on the Australian leg of their tour and now playing a sold out tour, as well as two dates at Koko in Camden (the same night as Mallory Know were playing down the road) playing album The Other Side in full tonight.

I love Tonight Alive and front woman Jenna McDougall kicks ass at every show I’ve seen. The band can go from going crazy to slower songs like ‘Amelia’, which Jenna bravely played on her own tonight with just the fans and an Acoustic Guitar, something not many front women do alone. The band just seemed so grateful for us all to be there, and you could see how much it meant to them. Comparing seeing them in a small venue and somewhere like Koko I think it would be fair to say that there were some nerves but they pulled them back in.

I really do love live music.

 

Hats off to you Miss Swift!

After WATIC last night I was pretty tired this morning so while Ali carried on sleeping I trudged off in the pouring rain to my seminar, not quite sure how I’d make it to Taylor Swift. My mood instantly increased when my tutor informed me that my essay had gotten me a first!! I was on top of the world, feeling happy and confident as well as excited to see my mum and sister later. With all the fuss about the tube strike the afternoon was filled with ‘will they wont they’ but thankfully the strike was cancelled and Mum managed to buy a last minute ticket…even if she was going to be sitting on her own.

To cut a long story short I was more than impressed with the concert after being a little aprihensive, was she really going to be that good live? I wont lie about the fact that I’m a fan of Taylor Swift, not huge but I have been for a good few years now and managed to listen to her stuff before she got huge over here in the UK. I was pleasantly surprised to say the least. Taylor Swift is not just a vocalist, she’s an actress, writer and accomplished musician. Tonight was a show in all forms, with incredible precision and costume changes, much to my sisters amazement. She also played so many instruments guitars, banjo and piano to name a few.

The best thing about seeing big musicians thought is when you can tell how much an audience means to them and Taylor proved that again and again with small smiles and looking around in amazement as well as opening with a long list of thanks. I don’t care if people don’t like her because seeing her live just proved to me how different musicians can be. I didn’t expect to love the concert as much as I did, and I would definitely go again, oh and new pop band ‘The Vamps’ were also pretty impressive for a group only just breaking the worlds stage! Oh and there was the small matter of Ellie Golding making an appearence!! Ok so I would have preffured Ed Sheeran but I am a little bit in love with him!

I managed to get some great shots on my camera ( thanks again Mum and Dad!) and I hope you enjoy some of them too!