My Mental Health Goals For This Year

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It’s been a while since I’ve posted about mental health, and that’s mainly because I haven’t known what to write. I’ve had so many ideas for other type of content that I’ve kind of tried ot focus on all the positives. That’s not to say that mental health posts can’t be positive, which leads me on to this one…

Last year was incredibly tough for me mentally, my confidence took a few beatings and my self esteem got smashed. I had to build myself back up quite a few times in the space of 12 months (my 2017 in review is here), so I’m proud of myself but want to take better care of my mental health in 2018.

So, here are my goals…

To be able to celebrate everyday achievements 

I’m way too hard on myself. That’s a fact. I want to try and celebrate everyday achievements and be pleased about the small things to try and get a more positive way of thinking.

To work on managing my anxiety in a healthy way 

I get anxious, I’ve had anxiety for years and I want to focus on healthy ways of tackling it. Whether that be through writing, listening to music or simply talking about it rather than letting myself get so stressed and worried that everything seems 100 times worse.

To look after my body better 

Ok, ok, I’ll admit last year I wasn’t great at looking after my body. I know that when I get a bit of exercise I feel better. I’ve also been making steps to drink more water and having a skin care routine too! Fingers crossed!

To accept rough patches as part of life, rather than defining life

I need to stop panicking when I hit a rough patch and thinking this is where it’s all going to go wrong. It’s a known fact anxiety can do this, but I’m stronger than my anxiety.

To make time for self care every week 

A bath, a good book, getting away from a screen, whatever I need to do! It’s really easy to burn yourself out so I’m trying to give myself a little bit of time each week to keep myself in good shape!

What are your mental health goals for this year? Let me know in the comments below!

January – A Great Month For Books!

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We’re almost through the first month of the year already which, let’s be honest, is welcome for many of us (anyone else crawling towards payday?). That said it’s been an absolutely brilliant month for books, in total I’ve read 13 books at the time of writing in this month (!!).

I don’t quite know how I’ve managed so many this month but I’m happy with it, especially as 8 of them were 4 and 5 star reads. So, why not share them with you and hopefully you can get some great recommendations and it’s a varied lot for you all.

Love, Hate & Other Filters – Samira Ahmed 

A wonderful debut about growing up and balancing cultures in the US today. This was a wonderfully written novel and tackles Islamaphobia head on. You can read my review here.

Night – Elie Wiesel

Deemed a classic piece of Holocaust literature I wanted to read this. It’s an absolutely heartbreaking novel and reiterated the horrors of the camps.

Promise Me, Dad – Joe Biden 

I read this after watching an interview with Joe Biden and Stephen Colbert. Joe seemed like a genuinely nice guy who cared a lot about his country. I listened to the audiobook of this and hearing the emotion in his voice broke my heart. A truly unique look at dealing with the loss of a loved one.

Only Child – Rhiannon Niven 

This is going to be a bestseller and if it’s not there’s something wrong with the world. This is brilliantly written and emotional novel, from the perspective of a child who survived a school shooting, losing his older brother in the process. An incredibly emotional read. Look out for my blog tour post on the 22nd Feb!

Everything I Know About Love – Dolly Alderton 

A brilliantly funny but also open look into the life of Dolly Alderton. This was a great read and I feel like it talks to twenty-somethings about similar experiences. I was lucky enough to receive an advanced copy of this book and my review will be coming up on Thursday!

The Secret History of Us – Jessi Kirby 

I was sent this by the lovely people at Harper 360 and wow, wow, wow. Memory loss, complicated relationships and trying to rebuild after trauma. Loved it, review to come in Feb!

A Court of Thorns and Roses – Sarah J Maas

I’m kicking myself for not picking this up before. I’d seen the ACOTAR books being raved about all over the internet and I just decided to go for it. This was incredible, if I didn’t have it in my hands I was thinking about it, a week after I finished I was still thinking about it. When I saw the next in the series I had to buy it. So, so, so good.

50 Queers Who Changed The World – Dan Jones 

I always want to learn more, I found this in Foyles on a trip to London and it seemed interesting. This was a brilliant look at Dan Jones’s perspective of figures of importance in the LGBTQ community. The illustrations were brilliant too!

 

How was your reading month? Let me know in the comments below!

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Life Update: I’m Being Published!

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I have some super exciting news! I’m going to be published! Yes, a piece of my work is going to be published in an actual physical book! The plan for tonight was to do my normal Thursday book review, but then I got an email. So, how did this come about?

I was lucky enough back in 2015 to be offered the chance to go to Athens as part of Kingston Writing School and I got to learn from the wonderful K.J. Orr about writing as well as being with other writers. I loved the course, I’d happily go back again to learn. This summer that will have been 3 years ago. Each year writers of the Summer School get the opportunity to submit pieces for an anthology.

I submitted last year and, unfortunately, didn’t get chosen which is fine because I don’t think it was my best work. This year, however, I wrote two poems, worked on them and submitted them in the new year. I wish I could say forgot about them but I didn’t I checked my email every day and…it worked.

I got the confirmation email today and I’m so, so excited. I love to write, I’ve always loved to write as soon as I learnt how to. Knowing that my name, my piece is going to be in a book is incredible. I also pretty sure that it’s only the start. I want and am working on writing my first novel in a series.

I’m so excited and I couldn’t wait to share this with you because honestly, I feel like writing my blog for the past few years has made me a better writer. I think about my content, the language and what you guys want to read alongside my own ideas. So a big thank you to everyone who reads my blog!

I’ll keep you all updated!

 

I’ve Been Hiding My Face!

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I've Been Hiding My Face

Me on a good day!

 

If you follow me on Instagram you might have noticed something. I like a good selfie when I feel good. I’ll show a new lipstick, hairstyle etc. But recently I’ve been shying away from the camera or at least I’ve been trying to hide a certain part in particular.

In the past few months, I have struggled with my skin and, it’s really impacted my confidence. I was piling on foundation to go to interviews and go to work. I was thinking of ways to cover the bottom of my face in pictures. This was completely new territory for me and I wanted to hide, I’d never had acne before!

I often try and promote body positivity, loving yourself and the like, but I also want to be honest. Of course, I have hang-ups about my body, who doesn’t. This was different though. I couldn’t work out why this kept happening and the spots growing and growing across my face. I hadn’t really dealt with it in my teenage years.

I spent so long trying to work out the cause and how it had changed so suddenly and taken my confidence with it. I’ve managed to get it down to a few potential factors, hormone changes due to a change in contraceptive and stress from losing my job being the main two.

After I’d gotten a new job and was feeling a little better I started thinking about all the time I spent putting makeup on. All the time I spent worrying about my skin and what other people thought I decided I’d had enough. I wanted to let my skin breathe. So I stopped wearing makeup to work and you know what? The world didn’t implode. I know can you believe it?

I’d got so caught up in my appearance I forgot that I wasn’t going to work or seeing friends because of my looks. I didn’t get hired for clear skin; I got hired for what I can do. I’m still self-conscious about my skin, but I’m working on it because there is so much more to life.

How do you feel about your skin? Is it something that you worry about? Let me know in the comments below!

10 things I’d tell 11 year old me

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Do you remember being 11? While most of us were pretty disappointed we didn’t get our Hogwarts letters, there was something pretty big going on for all of us, we were about to enter the zoo that is Secondary School. There’s a lot I wish I could go back and tell that scared kid because like it or not, it changed each and every one of us. Some for the better, others maybe not so much.

I had a think about things that I would tell myself, things I wish I could have known that might have made things a little easier. So here are my 10, don’t forget to let me know yours in the comments below!

Don’t be afraid of standing up for yourself.

I was bullied a lot as a kid, it was bad at the age of 11 but it continued. I didn’t want to get into trouble so a lot of the time I just took it. I wish I hadn’t.

You and your body are beautiful.

Ah Puberty, there’s nothing like it to destroy your confidence. This was the start of me worrying about my body. Was my stomach flat enough? Were my boobs going to be big enough? Why did my hair get so gross even when I washed it? Was my deodorant good enough?

This is when I started to doubt it and I wish I hadn’t because it takes YEARS to undo, I’m still working on it!

Don’t panic about not having any friends on the first day of school, you’ll find your friends.

I was petrified no one would like me when I got to secondary school. Little did I know I’d meet the best person in my life there a few years later…

Being nice will get you further than being a bitch, those girls won’t understand that for a long time.

BUT being too nice will get you walked on, it’s a thin line.

Don’t be embarrassed about being smart, keep reading, it’s going to help you a lot later on!

I got mercilessly teased as a kid for reading a lot…I was the 11-year-old reading Victoria Beckhams autobiography because I wanted to know more about her and had gotten through all of the Jacqueline Wilson novels the previous year. Don’t be ashamed of being smart!

Play with your sister as much as possible, she’ll grow up quicker than you think.

Having a sister that is nearly 7 years younger than me I wish I’d appreciated the time she was always at home. Now she’s 16 and off working, meeting friends and doing other things cherish the time!

Everything will happen for a reason.

The good, the bad, the ugly. Every damn thing happens for a reason and that’s what I believe.

There’s going to be some really shitty times ahead, but you’re going to get through them and it’s going to make you stronger.

My teenage years were really tough and sometimes I’m in awe that I managed what I did. But, I’m here, I’m still going.

Think about the future, you can’t do anything about the past.

This is something I’m still working on. It’s easy to get stuck in the past, think about who hurt you and where things went wrong but it won’t help you.

You’re going to grow up to be pretty awesome.

You’re pretty cool, kid.

 

What would you tell your 11-year-old self? Let me know in the comments below.

2018 so far

How’s 2018 going so far?

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Getting towards the end of last year I was nervous, I didn’t know what 2018 was going to bring and I was a little scared. I had a really shitty time last year and I didn’t know how much more I could deal with. So, how’s 2018 been so far? 3 weeks in.

In the last 3 weeks, I’ve started to feel something that I haven’t in a long time, and if I’m honest I’m almost afraid to say it, but I’m feeling hopeful. That’s not to say I’ve gotten into a ‘new me’ phase, I certainly haven’t, I have just carried on living my life as it is but it’s been ok.

So far I’ve already seen positive steps in where I want my career to go. I’ve been working on my blog and thinking about what I want to do and where I want to go with it. I’ve had conversations about the future. Am I optimistic? I guess, but I’m more cautiously optimistic than anything. I’m just working my hardest and hoping that it’ll get me where I want to go this year.

As my readers know, I set goals at the beginning of the year and I’m working towards them in a chilled out way. I’ve been working on my goal of getting to 5000 Twitter followers this year and I’m already a quarter of the way there (you can follow me here). I’ve noted down a few ideas towards my novel and I am working my ass off.

I don’t know if this year will be better or not. I don’t know if this is a great start leading to an even better year. For me though, having hope after a really tough year is a great thing. I’m moving forward and I have a game plan, so 3 weeks in I’m happy and hopeful.

How has 2018 been for you? What are your goals? Let me know in the comments below!

Book Review: Bad Girls With Perfect Faces – Lyn Weingarten

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How far would you go to protect your best friend?

All Sasha wants to do is protect Xavier from Ivy, from what she can do, but how far is she willing to go? Posing as a guy online to lure Ivy away is just the start…

Going in I feel I need to say that this novel gets dark pretty quickly, but it’s definitely what was needed. From this, it creates a brilliant atmosphere for the rest of the novel. It has darkness, intrigue and while at times there is some cliché moments, particularly in the beginning this evolves throughout the novel.

I wanted to start by saying that I didn’t particularly find any of these characters likeable and for that, I give Weingarten full credit. I found each of the characters to be quite selfish and while they claimed that their actions were out of love, it appeared to be more about themselves rather than anything.

The novel looks at the dangers of a life online, who someone is really speaking to as well as what relationships mean. Told in multiple points of view throughout, you can clearly see the motivations of the characters and what they hide from themselves and each other.

Overall I gave this 3 stars. While I enjoyed the novel, I was able to guess quite a few of the plot twists that were coming up. I don’t know if that’s just because I’ve read a lot of thrillers or it’s a reflection of the novel. Saying that I did still enjoy the novel and would love to see another on what the characters lives were like 10 years later if they were to meet again. So, not my favourite Weingarten novel, but I’d still recommend it.

Thank you so much to Netgalley, the publisher and author for this novel in exchange for an honest review.

10 to read in 2018!

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Good news guys, we’re over half way through January. I don’t know if it’s just me but this month feels like it’s lasting forever! So, to banish some of the dreary days I thought about books I’ve been looking forward to reading this year!

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Bad Girls With Perfect Faces – Lyn Weingarten

I absolutely LOVED Suicide Notes From Beautiful Girls some of the twists completely threw me off. When I heard that Lyn Weingarten was releasing another novel I jumped on it! You can read my review of Suicide Notes, here.

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The Curses – Laure Eve

Last year I read The Graces. This witchy, mystery YA series makes me SO EXCITED. Of course, I’ve pre-ordered the next in the series and after the end of the last novel, I can’t wait to see what this one holds.

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How Do You Like Me Now – Holly Bourne

I absolutely love Holly Bourne, The Spinster Club series was amazing so when I heard that Holly was writing an adult novel I requested it straight away. It’s also tipped to be a film already. This is going to be good.

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The Witch Doesn’t Burn In This One – Amanda Lovelace

Poetry book The Princess Saves Herself in This One was great, I didn’t know that it was going to be a part of a series. The series is called Women are some kind of magic, this is going to be a great instalment and some exciting poetry!

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The Wicked + The Divine: Imperial Phase Part 2 – Kieron Gillen

Wicked + The Divine!!!!!! I love this series, it’s brilliant and strange and I get so excited about every new volume. The last one took a new turn and I can’t wait to see where it goes.

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The Red Clocks – Leni Zumas

Abortion is illegal again, IVF is banned and women’s bodies are under strict rule. This looks incredible, sign me up.

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Sleeping Beauties – Stephen and Owen King

Confession time, I have never read a Stephen King novel! It’s one of my reading goals for the year to get through at least one and see what I think and this one was the first to seem interesting to me!

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A Court of Thorns and Roses – Sarah J. Maas

I have heard so much about this series and never picked it up. In the past year, I’ve tried to read a little more Fantasy. When I found it on offer I thought I might as well pick it up and give it a go.

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Some Kind of Wonderful – Giovanna Fletcher

I picked up a signed copy of Gi’s book last year and I haven’t gotten around to it. I read her non-fiction book Happy Mum, Happy Baby last year and loved it, so thought it was about time I read some of her fiction.

 

These are the 5 on my list, are any on yours? If not what are your top 5 to read this year? Let me know in the comments below!

 

 

 

5 to read in 2018!

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Good news guys, we’re over half way through January. I don’t know if it’s just me but this month feels like it’s lasting forever! So, to banish some of the dreary days I thought about books I’ve been looking forward to reading this year!

34144430

Bad Girls With Perfect Faces – Lyn Weingarten

I absolutely LOVED Suicide Notes From Beautiful Girls some of the twists completely threw me off. When I heard that Lyn Weingarten was releasing another novel I jumped on it! You can read my review of Suicide Notes, here.

25620458

The Curses – Laure Eve

Last year I read The Graces. This witchy, mystery YA series makes me SO EXCITED. Of course, I’ve pre-ordered the next in the series and after the end of the last novel, I can’t wait to see what this one holds.

34538386

How Do You Like Me Now – Holly Bourne

I absolutely love Holly Bourne, The Spinster Club series was amazing so when I heard that Holly was writing an adult novel I requested it straight away. It’s also tipped to be a film already. This is going to be good.

34518216 (1)

The Witch Doesn’t Burn In This One – Amanda Lovelace

Poetry book The Princess Saves Herself in This One was great, I didn’t know that it was going to be a part of a series. The series is called Women are some kind of magic, this is going to be a great instalment and some exciting poetry!

35651693

The Wicked + The Divine: Imperial Phase Part 2 – Kieron Gillen

Wicked + The Divine!!!!!! I love this series, it’s brilliant and strange and I get so excited about every new volume. The last one took a new turn and I can’t wait to see where it goes.

35099035

The Red Clocks – Leni Zumas

Abortion is illegal again, IVF is banned and women’s bodies are under strict rule. This looks incredible, sign me up.

30622162

Sleeping Beauties – Stephen and Owen King

Confession time, I have never read a Stephen King novel! It’s one of my reading goals for the year to get through at least one and see what I think and this one was the first to seem interesting to me!

16096824

A Court of Thorns and Roses – Sarah J. Maas

I have heard so much about this series and never picked it up. In the past year, I’ve tried to read a little more Fantasy. When I found it on offer I thought I might as well pick it up and give it a go.

35164060

Some Kind of Wonderful – Giovanna Fletcher

I picked up a signed copy of Gi’s book last year and I haven’t gotten around to it. I read her non-fiction book Happy Mum, Happy Baby last year and loved it, so thought it was about time I read some of her fiction.

 

These are the 5 on my list, are any on yours? If not what are your top 5 to read this year? Let me know in the comments below!

 

 

 

Homeowner Dreams www.chloemetzger.com

Homeowner Dreams

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There was once a time when owning a home was a milestone that the majority of people reached. It was a milestone of growing up, something you did before starting a family. When my Mum and Dad bought their house in 1996, this was the case, they’d never even had to rent before. Skip forward more than 20 years and meet me, their eldest child, and part of generation rent.

Think back to when you’d ask people what they would do if they won the lottery. Buy flash cars, luxury holidays etc. Now, say you won 20K on the lottery, in the South East of England that might get you a deposit for a small house. Not the whole house, just a deposit on a house. This is what young people like us are facing.

Will Young People Ever Be Able To Afford Their Own Homes?

The majority of you reading this are in the same position, the prospect of being able to save enough to merely put down a deposit on a house is more than most 20-somethings make in a year in their area. But, don’t forget people think if we bought fewer sandwiches, we could make the sacrifices to find that money…I’m not kidding that’s a genuine article I’ve linked to.

I don’t know when, or how, owning a home became something seemingly unachievable for most young people. While some are able to live at home until they are in their mid-twenties and save, that is not the case for the majority of us. That and we want our own space, not to live with our parents until we’re between 25 & 30. I don’t go on expensive holidays, I don’t drive an expensive car (I saved for 3 years while at uni for my current car), I take lunch with me most days but I am still paying almost double a mortgage to live in a 1 bedroom flat.

While my partner and I try and work out how we will be able to manage to try to scrape together money to put towards our own home, the prospects look increasingly bleak. A lack of affordable housing and sky-high deposit payments are just the tip of the iceberg. We’re told to give up any luxury, move out of certain places where it’s cheaper etc, this is completely ignoring the issues at hand. Most of which centre around greed.

I know this might have come across as a rant but, truly, this is a post born out of frustration. It doesn’t matter how good you are with money, we’re going back to a state of working people missing out. If you are able to get help from wealthy relatives, you might make it. Although for the average person Homeowner dreams have become just that, dreams.

What are your thoughts on becoming a Homeowner? Have you managed? Let me know in the comments below!