Book Review: Vox – Christina Dalcher

Oct 18, 2018Leave a comment

Set in the future United States, a new backwards world. As a college student, Jean wasn’t interested in politics. Fast forward to her life as a Dr and mother and she lives in a world that she doesn’t recognise. First, they came for their passports, then their jobs and finally their voices. They can only speak 100 words a day, or they pay the prices.

This novel is deliciously dark. As soon as I’d heard about it, I knew I wanted to read it and so when I heard there were advance copies at YALC I rushed to the stand to grab one. If you’re looking for a novel that will really make you think, this is the one for you. I don’t think it’s for the faint hearted either, things feel a little too real at times.

The novel centres around Dr Jean McClellan, one of the worlds best scientists in her field. Or at least she was. With a tracker on her wrist, books and writing utensils taken and no way of escape – until they need something for her. While Jean has no interest in helping the monsters that have trapped her and are warping the mind of her firstborn son there is something bigger than them – her daughter who has never known more than 100 words a day.

Now, I’ll be honest as of writing this review I haven’t read The Handmaids Tale (nor have I watched the TV show and won’t until I’ve read the book!) but I know the premise. This is another novel with a dystopian future with the treatment of women at the centre. These novels are picking up speed, and this was an excellent debut.

I think what Dalcher has done here is tap into what we are already seeing in terms of restrictions on reproductive rights in the US as the beginning of a bigger problem. While there may be points that seem far-fetched, there are episodes in history where these kinds of limitations have happened to people. This could be real.

There are times when I thought the novel was going a little slow and there were some plot points that could have been a little tighter but overall I thought it was brilliant. I read this so quickly and stayed up until the early hours of the morning and then couldn’t sleep because I was thinking about it constantly.

This novel got a rating of 4 stars and I really enjoyed it and for a debut, it was very impressive. I have been recommending it to everyone because it needs to be read an appreciated. The only reason it’s not a 5 star is that it felt a little slow in the beginning and, actually, I would have loved the first quarter be longer – that was my favourite part! I really recommend this, an excellent read that you won’t forget in a hurry.

What I Read In September

Oct 16, 2018Leave a comment

It’s finally time to let you all know what I read in September, maybe a little later than normal. It’s better late than never! So, there’s a bit of a mix in the month of September. I read a few shorter things just to try and get my reading mojo going.

So, let’s get cracking shall we!

A Spark of Light – Jodi Picoult

I was lucky enough to get an early release copy of this novel, especially as I have read almost all of Jodi’s books. This is another novel with multiple perspectives and a tough subject matter. Set in a women’s health clinic, a gunman holds hostages. A range of beliefs, backgrounds and more. I’ll recommend this novel – perhaps not my favourite of Jodi’s but still a worthwhile read.

She Wants It – Jill Soloway

Jill is one of the writers of the Amazon hit show Transparent, who came up with the idea after her own parent came out as Transgender. I didn’t know this before reading. I don’t know what his book was trying to be at all, it started as a memoir but certainly didn’t finish that way. I wasn’t keen on this one at all.

[Dis] connected – various

Wow, wow, wow. This is absolutely beautiful, one of my favourite collections of the year. Want to know my full thoughts? My review is here.

Lovely Seeds – R.H. Swaney

I received this from Netgalley too and it is a truly beautiful collection that really spoke to me. If everything is a little overwhelming and you need to feel okay this is a great one to pick up.

Ask Me His Name – Elle Wright

This was a heavy book but also beautiful. Elle’s son Teddy died when he was merely a few days old, every parent’s worst nightmare. This details how she and her husband got through the initial shock and how they continue each day while keeping Teddy alive in their thoughts and hearts.

Sun – Wilbert Van der Steen

This was a really great read. I flew through this with an intriguing art style and a story that I was really invested in, I absolutely loved Lucien and his relationship with his Grandfather. I will not spoil anything in this review BUT I thought the ending was fantastic and I can’t wait to read the next instalment! Another great read thanks to Netgalley.

What My Star Ratings Mean!

Oct 15, 2018Leave a comment

We’ve all seen the normal way of rating books. 1 Star to 5 Star, but what those ratings mean to people can really vary. So, I thought I’d make it clear what my ratings mean and give you some examples of books I’ve loved and loathed!

1 Star

Why was this written? What was the point of it at all? Normally it will be a one star if I find that it’s offensive, ridiculous or just nasty. It takes a lot for a book to be 1 star.

2 Star

When I don’t like a book. There’s always a reason behind it, usually, if I find it boring or don’t like the way in which it’s written. Also, it can be the topic and how it is portrayed.

3 Star

This doesn’t mean the book is good or bad, but just meh. There’s probably some things I don’t rate about it. It could be the pace, the plot or the writing. I simply means that I probably won’t pick it up again and it’ll eventually make its way to the donate/give away/selling pile.

4 Star

This book was really, really great. I loved certain aspects of it and I’m going to recommend it to people. For X reason it was quite a 5 star for me but damn it was good.

5 Star

OH MY GOD WOW, EVERYONE NEEDS TO READ THIS. IM GETTING ALL MY FRIENDS A COPY AND TWEETING THE AUTHOR AND AHHHHH I LOVE THIS SO MUCH!

It’s true that over time I have been known to change ratings depending on how I feel. A book I might have thought was a masterpiece at 15, I might not feel the same way about now. Similarly, I used to hate classics with a passion but now I’m a little older I can appreciate some of them and understand why they were so important! We change so much in life, which means our ratings will too!

How do you rate your books? Let me know in the comments below!

Book Review: This Is Where It Ends – Marieke Nijkamp

Oct 11, 2018Leave a comment

10:00 a.m. The principal of Opportunity High School finishes her speech, welcoming the entire student body to a new semester and encouraging them to excel and achieve.

10:02 a.m. The students get up to leave the auditorium for their next class.

10:03 a.m. The auditorium doors won’t open.

10:05 a.m. Someone starts shooting.

The novel centres around a school shooting, each perspective is that of someone who has been in contact with the shooter in some way or another – and they all have something to lose. A novel full of suspense, who will get out alive?

I’ve been waiting to read this novel since it was released and I finally picked it up at YALC in the summer. I’m fascinated by how an author gets into writing such a tough novel because, ultimately, there is a lot of risk of not getting it right. I believe that Nijkamp was very sensitive and has fleshed out the characters really well.

I was really pleased to see the LGBT representation in the novel, two of the characters are lesbians and dealing with their breakup as the shooting emerges. There is also a character with a disability, as well as multiple characters who are ethnic minorities – but this doesn’t feel forced at all.

I thought it was really interesting how the novel used social media within the situation. These are teenagers and what we have seen, particularly in response to Parkland, is how young people use social media. Of course, there would be tweets, people would be trying to reach people. This was a good addition on Nijkamp’s part.

The ending was terribly, terribly sad and just leaves the novel on a poignant note. The shooting is, unfortunately, just the start of many people’s nightmares. Some will have to face life without their family members, others will have to live with injuries similar to those in war zones.

I gave this novel 4 stars, this was incredibly well written and tackled an incredibly hard topic. In the current climate, more novels like this should be available to bring awareness to what can happen. If you liked Only Child, one of my top reads of the year, you will also find this to be an excellent novel.

Where I’m At – World Mental Health Day 2018

Oct 10, 2018Leave a comment

Today is World Mental Health Day. I thought about what I wanted to do for a while and then it hit me. Why not give you guys an update on how I’ve been doing recently? I’m hoping that by talking about my own life and feelings it opens the conversation and takes away that damn stigma that’s still hanging around!

So, how am I doing right now?

Things are very different this year to any other. I took a big step going freelance and the change in job has had a big impact on my mental health. I was really struggling for the past year with that I wanted to do with my life and my career. I wasn’t happy but I thought that was just life, you went to a 9-5, you had a commute you hated.

Until I didn’t. Freelancing has many challenges and its own stresses – it’s not all sunshine and rainbows, but that’s another blog post. BUT, the stress of two 45 minute commutes? Gone. The stress of not having control over certain aspects of my career? Gone. If I need to take a break for my health, I can do that. In that regard, I’m doing much better and my self-confidence is growing.

I’m still working on myself – this is an ongoing health condition. Some days I feel great and can do everything. Other days I struggle to even get out of bed, to see the point in what I’m doing and think I’m terrible at everything. It’s taking it day by day. So, I’m a lot better than I was a year ago, but it’s a constant effort.

How’s the self-care going?

Ummmmm, well….. Ok I’ll be honest with you, I’ve kinda been slacking. There’s a lot of excuses I could give about the fact I haven’t been looking after myself a much as I should.

More time for me, more baths, more early nights – I will try!

What I wish I knew a year ago

You don’t need to please everyone, things will work out no matter what.

Fibromyalgia and Me

Oct 8, 201811 Comments

In the first few months of this year, I was struggling with something that I didn’t want to speak about. A few years ago I broke my spine and in theory, it should have healed in 6 weeks and been a lot better within a few months. Then it didn’t… I had physiotherapy, acupuncture, had a routine by the rehab team, spinal injections the lot. It didn’t get better.

Test after test showed nothing, I was exhausted and in pain which was taking over my entire body. I was told that the spine wasn’t the cause but why did it hurt so much? I was absolutely miserable. Then I watched the Lady Gaga documentary Five Foot Two and it changed everything. It all clicked into place, I had Fibromyalgia.

The NHS website describes Fibromyalgia as:

Fibromyalgia, also called fibromyalgia syndrome (FMS), is a long-term condition that causes pain all over the body.

As well as widespread pain, people with fibromyalgia may also have:

increased sensitivity to pain
fatigue (extreme tiredness)
muscle stiffness
difficulty sleeping
problems with mental processes (known as “fibro-fog”) – such as problems with memory and concentration
headaches
irritable bowel syndrome (IBS) – a digestive condition that causes stomach pain and bloating

One of my best friends, Sarah, also has Fibromyalgia, she’d hinted it was something I should look into but I didn’t want to face it. I didn’t want a chronic illness (I know, logic wasn’t working here). Until one day I went to see the kindest doctor I knew and broke down. I told her every ache and pain, the tiredness, the stress. The fact I was hiding from everyone.

It’s not easy to get a diagnosis, there’s not a blood test or a scan. I was referred to a Rheumatologist which had a long wait. I took the day off work for the appointment and went with my Mum. I was an anxious mess, what if he didn’t believe me, but what if he did? It’s a hard set of emotions to explain.

I shouldn’t have worried, my doctor was incredible. We had a long chat and he checked the key points on the body which would lead to a Fibromyalgia diagnosis in combination with other factors.

The thing is, without Lady Gaga (and my friend Sarah) I probably would have had no idea what was going on with my body. More importantly, seeing people who are so successful (Gaga) and kind (Sarah) but still living with this condition gave me hope. Hope that I’d manage all this pain and anxiety, that I could still be a boss babe despite it all.

I’m hoping that in future I’ll be a lot more comfortable to talk about living with Fibromyalgia. It’s taken me a long time to process and feel comfortable about it myself. BUT I am still me, I still achieve what I want to and I still kick ass.

Thank you so much for reading!

On Loneliness

Oct 5, 20181 Comment

Recently, I heard that young people between the ages of 16-24 feel the most lonely It didn’t surprise me in the slightest because I completely agree. The last few years I’ve felt very lonely – even in the last few weeks I’ve struggled with loneliness. I have a very loving family, I quite often just go and hang out with them.

I feel like there are so many ways you can feel lonely and, often, it’s not easy to talk about. You don’t want to worry people, you don’t want to seem needy and, for me at least, there are confusing feelings. Have you ever been in a room full of people and felt alone? I’m sure you have.

But what are the biggest reasons to feel lonely?

Social Media

I love it, it’s literally my job to create, manage and monitor social media. That said, everyone posts a highlight reel which means it can look like everyone is out having fun, living their best life and you’re sat at home in your PJs. I know this and, sometimes, I still feel lonely! It’s easy to get swept up in it.

Growing up and apart

Your late teens and early twenties are also a time of huge change. You grow up and a lot of times you can grow apart from people you’re really close to. Some people I know have moved to new cities or even countries.

Not knowing what the hell you’re doing

I can *seem* like everyone else has their shit together. They don’t, I promise you. Everyone I speak to says they don’t know what they’re doing with their lives, they question everything they do. But for that conversation, one of you has to admit it and that can be the hardest part, am I right?

Relationships

So many people I know feel lonely because of relationships. I have friends who are single who feel lonely, friends in relationships to feel like they’re disconnected from friends who are single or in very different relationships. For me, I feel lonely when Ali goes on tour, as I write this he’s in Manchester. Not having him to hug can be really lonely.

That’s just some of the reasons I think people my age are lonely – but I might not have your reason listed. I guess I’m writing this because I wanted to say you might feel lonely but you’re not alone.

Book Review: [Dis]connected Poems & Stories of Connection and Otherwise – Amanda Lovelace; Nikita Gill; Iain S. Thomas; Cyrus Parker; Sara Bond; Yena Sharma Purmasir; Trista Mateer; Canisia Lubrin; R. H. Swaney; Pierre Alex Jeanty

Oct 4, 20181 Comment

Wow, wow, wow this is an incredible connection. Going in I expected more poetry than short stories but in the end, I thought these were some of the best short stories I have ever read. There was a real sense of variety despite the connection they all share and the collection itself.

This is a collection that tackles so many different issues from grief to family. Real life issues to fantastic fantasy. I truly believe there is something in this collection for everyone and being able to get a sneak peek of this was brilliant, I haven’t stopped recommending people pre-order this and make sure that they get their own copy. I truly, truly fell in love with this.

Some of my favourites were Nikita Gill’s Parietal Eye, Cyrus Parker’s Where The Sea Meets the Sky, Sara Bond’s Terra Firma, Yena Sharma Purmasir’s Ultra and Amanda Lovelace’s Small Yellow Cottage on the Shore. Each of these are so different and yet were perfectly chosen to fit next to each other.

It might sound like a broken record but it is hard to convey just how beautiful these stories are. Unlike many other collections I have read, I could not put this down. Each story and author wrote such compelling tales I had to read the next one, and the next and the next. Some were incredibly creepy, inspired by Edgar Allen Poe, while others used Mythology and Mermaids. Each could individually capture something within me.

I gave this collection 5 stars. I literally picked it up because I recognised two incredibly brilliant poets and ended up finding even more, that I would like to read further. I really have to sing the praises because this completely knocked me for six and I didn’t know much going in.

Thank you so much to Netgalley and the publisher for this copy for review.

September Favourites!

Oct 3, 2018Leave a comment

September favourites, already? Yep, we’re now in the last quarter of the year! No, I don’t know how it happened either. September was a funny old month, there were some excellent parts, and some not so excellent. That said, let’s get cracking with my September favourites.

Disney

Just in case you missed it, I got to go to Disneyland in September. DISNEY LAND. I had the best time with my Mum and my sister and I won’t gush too much here – so here’s a part 1 AND part 2. You are welcome!

Books

I didn’t get too much reading done in September but some of them I really did enjoy. I managed to finish an early release copy of Jodi Picoult’s A Spark of Ligh (review to come) about a shooting in a women’s health centre. Different to her other novels in the way it was written, but a good read.

I also read Ask Me His Name, which is an important and heartbreaking read about a mother who doesn’t get to bring her son home after his death at 3 days old. My final favourite for the month is Disconnected, a breathtaking collection of short stories and poems. This was amazing and I can’t wait to share my review with you.!

Things to do

I went out a fair bit this month, I went out with some friends for my birthday (absolutely in love with that skirt!). I also met up with my friend Lucy, the first time we’ve hung out without any little ones in 5 years! And last, but not least, I saw the incredible Sarah Millican at one of our local theatres. My face hurt at the end because I was laughing so hard.

Harry Potter

I spent most of this month building some kind of Lego or other. As I type, Ali has ordered me the Great Hall set for me to carry on with for his final few weeks of the tour. I also picked up this adorable candle from Primark, I wish I had smell-o-vision because it’s so gorgeous.

Birthday!

I spent my birthday wrapped up in blankets with the worst cold ever. So, not exactly how I planned it. I did get some absolutely lovely presents. They’re all really grown up as you can see.

General

And just a few little things that I really loved. Walking in the Autumn sunshine with my lovely Lottie. Also, the cheeky tub of Ben and Jerry’s because I haven’t had any in SO LONG and it was on sale. Just a reminder if you want the Ice Cream, eat the damn stuff because life is too short.

Posts

You Matter – A post for suicide awareness

18 Good Things That Happened At 23 – Looking back at 23!

Book Review: Tyler Johnson Was Here

10 Reasons Autumn Is My Favourite Season

What were your favourites in September? Let me know in the comments below!

September Book Haul

Sep 29, 2018Leave a comment

A birthday and no self-control means a September Book Haul! Yay! So these are the few physcial books I’ve picked up in September, I’m now on a ban…who am I kidding there’s too many amazing

Let’s get started with some of the amazing deals I got on Amazon. First up Everything I Never Told You and Little Fires Everywhere by Celeste Ng. I keep hearing about this author and when they were £2 each I thought it was worth a go. I will report back.

Next up My Purple Scented Novel by Ian McEwan. This is absolutely tiny but I really loved Nutshell and wanted to read something else by McEwan without a huge time commitment. I also picked up Survivors: True Stories of the Children of the Holocaust by Allan Zullo, this was on offer and I want to hear the stories that these people have so it is never forgotten.

Kick-Ass poetry by amazing women? I’m sold which is why I bought She Is Fierce by Ana Sampson. It had Sylvia Plath in so it has to be good. Next up another poetry collection, I Hope My Voice Doesn’t Skip by Alicia Cook who is known to use music within her poetry – I’m really looking forward to this one.

I’d heard a lot about this. What Would Boudicca Do? by E.Foley & B.Coates takes women from history and modern problems, how would they deal with it? This looks really fun. Next up I pre-ordered The Guilty Feminist by Deborah Frances-White, I’ve heard a lot about the podcast and ones I’ve listened to have been great.

I’m trying to savor the Saga series so I went ahead and ordered Volume 6 and Volume 7. For my birthday I got Three-Martini Lunch by Suzanne Rindell in a mystery book package, New York, 1960s let’s give it a go. I also picked up Fierce Fairytales & Other Stories to Stir Your Soul by Nikita Gill on the recommendation of my friend Sarah. Who am I to say no to feminist fairytales?

Another birthday gift was My Lesbian Experience with Loneliness by Nagata Kabi. This is manga that I keep seeing again and again. I ordered Vengeful by V.E Schwab ages ago thinking I’d read Vicious before…that didn’t quite go to plan but HOW BEAUTIFUL! I was also sent a copy of The Witches of St. Petersberg by Imogen Edward-Jones as part of an upcoming book tour. I didn’t want to know too much about it before going in but keep your eyes peeled!

My final two books I also got at birthday gifts, I’ve really wanted to try some Leigh Bardugo and so I didn’t just get one, I got two for my birthday! Lucky, lucky gal!

Well, that’s all the books I got in September! Now I just need to get through them all…wish me luck! Are there any you’ve read and would recommend or any on your to-read list? Let me know in the comments below!

Chloe Metzger

Lifestyle, Books and More

Book Review: Vox – Christina Dalcher