Book Review: Only Ever Yours – Louise O’Neill

Oct 22, 2015Aug 20, 20161 Comment

‘I’m a good girl. I am pretty. I am always happy-go-lucky.’

freida and isabel (intentionally lowercase)are finally in their final year at the school, all of their training will finally come in use as they fight to become companions for the wealthy young men who will come to choose them. The girls are high in ranking and expected to breeze into their lives as companions, that is until isabel does the unthinkable, she starts to gain weight. Can freida save them both in time?

I want to start this review by saying that I was surprised by this novel, it’s not something that I would usually pick up but the blurb was intriguing and the cover was more than a little creepy. I don’t think I was fully prepared for the novel and the social implications that it covers, because they’re not explicitly advertised. I’d have to say that there are some strong crossovers with that I know about The Handmaid’s Tale. It’s definitely different to novels that I normally read and it’s made me a lot more interested in dystopian fiction, so we’re on a good start!

So, a little background information, the novel is set in a world far into the future. Children are now created and only boys are brought up and given opportunities, girls are sent to the school to learn the ways of a perfect woman, be judged, ranked and immaculately dressed. They are told the importance of breeding healthy sons until they are deemed no longer useful. For those who are not chosen to live as Companions, live the lives of the Courtesans whose ambition is to sexually please the men of the world.

As I previously mentioned, the eves as they are named, all have lower case letters, they are not deemed important enough for a capital letter in their name. O’Neill makes a strong case for examining how we look at beauty and how we judge young women, yes we are not in the state that plays out in the book but how do we look at beauty and young women? There is an incredibly strong and well thought out message of feminism and the whole modern concept of a woman, we focus so much on our looks and being ‘ranked’ by other people on social media, it’s a scary glimpse into a terrifying world.

This is generally a fast paced and eerie novel, I loved the ideas and especially the relationship between freida and isabel. The girls aren’t given love or anything in terms of a motherly relationship so the relationship they share is even more incredible. Some people have argued that parts have a mean girls type feel and I can see where their coming from but I feel like it’s a lot deeper.

I’m giving this novel four stars ****! While I think it was very well done, cleverly put together and seeing as this is a debut novel (!!) we can expect great things from Louise O’Neill, she’s not afraid to tackle unpleasantness and things that we would rather not think about. The only thing I wasn’t that keen on was the ending of the novel, it wasn’t that it was bad, it just wasn’t what I was expecting. I’d love to hear what all of you think of the ending, so give me a comment below! Now, excuse me while I try and find a copy of O’Neill’s latest novel ‘Asking For It’, what seems like it’s going to be another unflinching novel.

Next Week’s Review: The Skeleton Cupboard

All reviews by Chloe Metzger and are not sponsored.

We need to value female education

Oct 20, 2015Leave a comment

We must value education. I more than most hated school as a teenager, it was dull repetitive and a source of daily hell for me. There is a lot of work that needs to be done in the British school system but at least we have it. Each child can go to school and get the opportunity to learn. I may have had to teach myself a lot while I was at home struggling with mental illness but I could still take the exams for free.

I watched the above Ted talk last week and it struck me how lucky I am as a woman to be in education and attempting to go into the world of education as a career. I think that this is one of the few accounts that don’t demonise all men, it educates us that some places in the world still need help with gender equality. It shows us that things are changing and compromise is the way forward, finding a way to educate and reason with age old traditions and hopefully end FGM along the way.

I find that now in my darkest times my love for academia can help me so much, it gives me something else to focus on and something that is so much bigger than me. My other love of course is music but my hope is that if we work on all young women receiving an education they can be exposed to the arts and find their own passions and loves. I hope that in 50 years we can go a long way in making education equal for girls and women no matter where they are in the world.

One of my best friends is getting married!!!

Oct 19, 2015Oct 20, 2015Leave a comment

This weekend I got the amazing news that my best friend is going to be getting married!! Yes, my fellow long term relationship friend got proposed to this weekend. Amy and Peter are a truly brilliant couple and I have been doing nothing but smiling since I got the message and started screaming and laughing with excitement in the middle of Wimbledon station with Daniela…I’m pretty sure people thought we were having some kind of break down.

When your best friend gets engaged a lot of people tell you that you’ll have this wave of jealousy, this ‘why isn’t it me’ reaction but I can honestly say I haven’t. My smile has been as wide as it’s ever been and as soon as I could I went to buy an engagement card, started thinking of things I could get them as wedding gifts and any way that I could possibly help Amy.

I can’t wait to celebrate with these two (sorry for pinching your picture Peter), who truly are meant for each other and have given childhood sweethearts another happy ending. Now let the celebrations, crazy planning and good times continue, I can’t wait to see them say ‘I do’.

Congratulations Amy and Peter!!!!

Stylist Live!

Oct 18, 2015Oct 20, 2015Leave a comment

This week I was lucky enough to win tickets to Stylist Live, this is Stylist magazine’s first big event, located in central London with great speakers such as Katie Piper, Nigella Lawson, Dawn O’porter to name just a few. The event has been running for the past few days and today was its last. Now I had no idea what to expect from an event like this, I’ve never been to anything fashion and magazine like before.

So Dani and I turned up, were handed a drink and just kind of wandered around until there was something we wanted to do. I got the impression that the event was for people with money and speaking to great companies but a lot of them are way out of my price range. It was a nice thing to go to but I don’t think I would have paid £25 for a ticket because there just wasn’t enough to do. While I had a plan of all these talks I wanted to go to the rooms were too small, getting there 15-20 minutes early and the talk was already full. You’d have to wait for nearly an hour to go to one talk, meaning you would miss your next one.

I did enjoy seeing my first proper fashion show, even if I didn’t take it entirely seriously, really because catwalk fashion is always a little off to me. The catwalk was better because it was based on high street, even though I definitely don’t have the body type for 90% of the outfits on the catwalk. I think I’ll stick to my Next jumpers and Topshop jumpers!

We made the most of the day though, we left early because the queues were crazy and ended up in an amazing little Oxfam bookshop where I ended up getting a load of stuff for my dissertation and there was an amazing piano (in the top left of the above picture). I’m glad I got to spend the day with Daniela and do something a little different, as well as getting some good news which you’ll have to check tomorrow’s post for. All in all I think I’m going to be sticking mostly with book reviews and my student bits and pieces, I’m not quite a fashionista yet.

Why I’m not writing tonight

Oct 17, 2015Oct 20, 2015Leave a comment

I’ll be back, thank you for understanding ❤

Meeting Katie Piper

Oct 16, 2015Oct 17, 20154 Comments

This week I got to meet one of my idols. You may have heard of her, seen her books or watched one of her TV shows, the latest being Extraordinary Births for Channel 4, she also has her own charity for burns survivors. I add that last because there are a lot of things that Katie Piper is and she’s not defined by the fact that 7 years ago she was in an acid attack, she’s a survivor.

Katie’s from a few towns over from me, so when it happened, there was a section in the paper, although not identifying her. I’ve followed Katie’s story and work since the beginning. Meeting her is one of my dreams and it finally happened. She’s absolutely lovely and her talk was inspirational, I didn’t expect any less. I’ll admit that I almost cried but I felt so empowered, I felt like I could do what she had done and take my past and turn it into something positive.

My message from Katie

I was able to get some 1-1 time with Katie, she remembered tweeting me a while ago when my spine broke, we spoke about Basingstoke town centre (we’re both local). She’s so lovely and sweet, I told her if there was anything I could do for the Katie Piper Foundation then just to let me know. The book she gave me has been waiting since the KU Talent Awards when she was supposed to host but her esophagus burst.

It was a great evening and I don’t think I’ve ever been more inspired by someone, she is what I aspire to be and I will keep using the power of positive thinking and hopefully I’ll meet Katie again.

Book Review: All My Secrets- Sophie McKenzie

Oct 15, 2015Aug 20, 2016Leave a comment

‘There’s a terrible secret. Mr Treeves shuffles from side to side, but I’m frozen to the spot.’

Let’s start by saying I read this in four hours. I hope this gives a good indication of how this review is going to go. Evie Brown is a normal teenager at the start of a long and boring summer waiting for her birthday. She doesn’t know that the next knock on the door is going to change her life. She is told that she has inherited £10 million, but at what cost? Soon Evie finds herself shipped off to Lightsea, an institute for troubled teens by those who love her most. Who can Evie turn to now?

I’m a big fan of Sophie McKenzie, after reading her adult thriller Close My Eyes last year, it was one of the best twists I’d read in a while and so when I heard that All My Secrets was for YA I was instantly drawn to it. As I said earlier I read this in a matter of hours and as with her earlier novel McKenzie allows you to think you have it all worked out before throwing a spanner into the works. The novel really waves in and out giving the reader clues throughout making you question yourself at the end as to why you didn’t figure it out.

I really liked the character of Evie and the journey she goes on through the novel, I didn’t see the first twist and now I find it brilliant. It is something that completely changes her world and how she see’s the people in it. While many would think, I’d take £10 million no matter what, I can assure you that this would make you think twice about it. As Evie delves more and more into the mysteries of Lightsea she has to consider who to trust or risk losing her life. I feel like Evie is very realistic in the way she handles the situation she is left in, she has her flaws and is not a seemingly perfect character.

One of the few things that I got bored of quickly in the novel is the love interest that Evie has during her time at Lightsea, I understand teenagers will be teenagers but I really wanted to know more about the other young people. There are such interesting and vibrant characters created by McKenzie and I really wanted to know more about them as well as the island itself, which has been well described throughout.

I’m going to give this 4 stars ****. This is the first of McKenzie’s YA novels that I’ve read and it was a great start. I love the fact that she has been able to seamlessly branch across genres. The reason I didn’t give this novel 5 stars is simply because I wanted to get to know the other characters better and see more of who they are and why they are also at Lightsea, their reasons are mentioned but quite quickly but not in detail.

Running my First Ride

Oct 14, 2015Oct 14, 2015Leave a comment

Today I finally ran my first ride as President of the Horse Riding Society. I’ll be honest I’ve been dreading this day, I’ve really struggled with the idea of running the society since my accident. I just kept thinking, how was I going to enjoy something that I couldn’t do any more? Was I going to feel as down as I did at Fresher’s Fayre? I’ve been stressed, upset and just not feeling ok about it all. So I decided that I’d have one attempt at running the society, if I hated it then I’d consider resigning.

I was pleasantly surprised, the riders all enjoyed themselves and it actually felt good to be around the horses again. I got to see Jemima, the horse I learnt on and Dublin the last horse I rode on. Laura told me that it was worth seeing people enjoy their rides and it is, it also helped to talk to the riders and staff. I’ve felt a little like I’m stupid or something because I get so down but they all completely understood. Jules, the lady who works there was really kind to me, she said if I wanted to go back when I was fully healed and that I could go back then to take my time, that it’s a huge thing to happen not to mention to impact on my body.

Me last year during my first ride

I’m definitely going to stay as President, it also helps that I have my amazing dream team with me, the three of us got through the session with success and I finally feel hopeful about this part of my life again, after all who doesn’t love cuddling up to some lovely horses…especially when they cuddle back 🙂

Isn’t Inside Out incredible?!

Oct 12, 2015Leave a comment

Tonight I finally caught up (you know, 4 months late) with the phenomenal Inside Out. I’ve had friends raving about it for months but I had really limited money over the summer so a trip to the cinema was out of the question. I absolutely love this movie, it’s absolutely fantastic and all the characters are just brilliantly written, I don’t know anyone would couldn’t relate to at least one of them.

For me I feel like there is a big battle between the Sadness and Joy in my head, especially when I’m stressed, oh and you know Anger and Disgust are best buds for me. Fear is around too. Now I bet you’re reading this and thinking she’s lost it, she’s finally lost it. While I don’t think there are little people in my brain controlling what I think, say and do, I’ve never seeing something that I just got so much. It’s a really sweet film and great for kids to learn and understand…although I’d definitely love to see a sequel when she’s a teenager. Because you know then all the emotions would just freak out and everyone who’s been through it would just nod along and remember the emotional freak out.

It might be a strange thing to write about but I have so much love for this movie and wish I’d seen it sooner. It was just what I needed after a slightly stressful evening 🙂

World Mental Health Day – 10th October 2015

Oct 10, 20152 Comments

I didn’t intend to write a post on mental health today, until I realised that World Mental Health Day had snuck up on me and I didn’t have anything planned. I think a lot about how much about mental health I should put onto my blog, am I putting too little in, am I putting too much in, will people just see me as an illness? It’s a big concern I have being so open about my issues and my life.

I’ve lived with issues since I was 11, I’d be extremely unhappy at school due to bullying. I’d say that the really awful depression started at around 15, so 6 years ago now. I’m in a much better place but I’m not ‘cured’ and I’ll probably live with this for the rest of my life, it’s just one part of me. It’s like my asthma or the weak knees I inherited, it’s just something that’s there which can make my life more difficult.

I’m fully aware that not everyone gets the help I now get and isn’t as open, and that’s fine! This is one of the most person illnesses you can have, if you don’t want to talk about it so be it! For a long time after my diagnoses although I felt some relief I couldn’t say it out loud I couldn’t say ‘I have depression’ because I was scared about what people would say, even now I have that and it’s sad. We need more education because at least one quarter of the population lives with a mental illness, so why is it still taboo?

The Duke and Duchess of Cambridge today, photo from the BBC

Love them (like me) or hate them, the royal family getting involved in mental health work and the fight against stigma can only be a good thing. I understand William’s public self helping with the cause due to his late mother, Princess Diana, who openly admit to struggling with Depression, Self-harm and Bulimia before she died. Catherine also has been strongly involved, particularly when it comes to young people, whether this is for personal reasons or not I cannot fault her. The fact that these young royals are being open and engaging will hopefully send a message to people or hope.

There’s also celebrities opening up more and more, I personally find inspiration in JK Rowling and Stephen Fry. When you see people in the public eye talking or just admitting that they also have a mental illness it makes you feel more normal, like you can achieve like they have and that you have someone to admire. I think it also makes them more human.

I thought a lot before writing this and I didn’t want it to be specifically about me, I just didn’t feel like exposing my emotions right now, partly because I’m in a bit of a werid headspace where my brain can’t work out of I’m on a high or a low…it’s really hard to explain. I did want to mention how interested people were at the open day today about the topic of mental health in my dissertation and going on in my PhD later hopefully. I wanted to mention how I came home and drew something to mark the day and try and get out how I was feeling whilst watching Stephen Fry’s ‘The Life of a Manic Depressive’ because I didn’t know what I wanted to write about. Like most people in his documentary said, my illness can make my life utter hell but at the same time I don’t know if I’d get rid of it.