Category: Uncategorized

Where’s The Damn Book?!

2 Comments

3aebbbc1b87a0b7c9f6510fc71f351d4

I’ve been wanting to write a book since before I started university. I’ve always written stories and the summer before I moved (3 damn years ago) I was working on my first novel. I was going to uni to do Creative Writing and I was going to be a writer. And then I started the course. I quickly realised I hated the course with a passion and spent a year of my life being told my work wasn’t good enough by older people. It always confused me because people my own age and one or two lecturers really liked it but there were some that were just hell bent on saying I wasn’t good enough. Now I’ve never had the strongest self esteem, I understand creative criticism but when you work so, so hard to get onto a course to be told by someone who has never read a word you’ve written that you’re writing is bad, you kind of take it to heart. Well, at least an 18 year old who’s just moved away from home and who’s walking around in an incredibly anxious state takes it to heart. I feel better now that it was just her opinion and truth be told after I refused to be caught by her after some catastrophic writing she’d put online (claiming that anorexia wasn’t real), I distanced myself from her and felt a little better about my writing. People liked reading what I wrote online, so why wouldn’t someone publish it eventually?

I’ve kept up my blog for almost three years now and had another before that, one of the main things people comment on when they search for me is the quality of my writing. So why isn’t that enough? This time last year I’d just returned from Athens on a week long creative writing course. Everyone was there because they knew to some extent what they wanted to write and I did too, something that my undergrad course lacked. Again I got positivity and some really great feedback but then the inevitable happened and I fell out of love with what I was writing and then I was there with ideas. Great right? I wish. I have all these ideas but self doubt is crippling. I write something, look at it a few hours later and can’t stand it. I get anxious that I’ll make spelling or grammar error and then be seen as an idiot. It’s deep in my heart that I want to be a writer, I want to see my name in a bookshop and see my thoughts on paper.

I know for a fact I can do it and I will, right now though my head feels so muddled and confused. What should I write about? Do I work on the non fiction piece? Do I try again on that old novel idea or start something completely different? Am I writing for Adults or Young Adults. All these thoughts go around and around in my brain and if I try and plan I get even more anxious because WHY IS THERE NO MANUAL THAT TEACHES YOU HOW TO BE AN AUTHOR. Which is silly, there’s no golden rule, not curse to break or magic formulae to make sure people will love what you’ve written. I know all this and yet I still want to delete pages of writing or worry about ever finishing something. I’m hoping these are rational fears.

It may sound like I’m complaining but I’m not, I feel like I have so much to give but it’s almost as if it’s trapped in my head and just won’t negotiate with my hands. I have ideas every night before I go to sleep and think they’re magical I wake up after scribbling them down and wonder how the hell I’m going to make something out of them. I don’t know, I thought I’d have a draft of a novel by now and I know, I know books can take years and years to just draft and then even more to get published. I’m just trying to get out of this rut where I just look at the page in anger because it’s just not doing what I want it to. My biggest critic is now myself, but I think with the voices of others inside, from the past who really shouldn’t be there. So I guess I’m going to have to work on kicking them out and working out what the hell I want to put on to paper, that might be a good idea. Oh and I might find the bloody book in my head stored away somewhere just waiting to come out.

 

Image from Pinterest

5 Muhammad Ali Quotes to Live By

Leave a comment

As well as being a star in the ring, Muhammad Ali was incredible with words, and a poet too. While I’m not a boxing fan, he is a inspiration to me. Not only did Ali stand up for what he believed in, no matter what the cost (such as his stance against the Vietnam war), but he also wasn’t afraid to talk the talk. Here’s 5 quotes to live by from the one and only Muhammad Ali.

069de5e0aec73f787ae4c5ef7168b916

A lot of Ali’s quotes were about carrying on, this one in particular sticks with me. Struggling sucks but trying to remember why you’re struggling and what the end game is makes it a lot easier to deal with.

 ec2b408e20c4485308a3fc63e9b78eff

Again, you fall down? You pick yourself back up again. I completely agree with this, everyone goes down sometimes but it’s picking yourself up that shows strength.

03eb43635c8df8bdb1a3fd0559ebac80

Ali risked so much when he opposed the Vietnam war and stood up to racism. IT could have ended his career but he still stood up for what he believed in. If this isn’t a reason to see Ali as an inspiration, I don’t know what is.

8f61273f58ce7229a7eba34a900db98a

Who doesn’t know this phrase?!

Right now Islam and the Muslim community need our support. We need to remember the peace that Ali reminded us of after 9/11 and people should know the ‘real truth about Islam’. One of the world’s greatest, and by all accounts nicest, men reminding us that it is extremism and hate of a minority that causes such devastation, not a book.

Rest in Peace Muhammad Ali.

All of these images and videos belong to the lovely people of Pinterest and Twitter.

Comic Con Summer 2016!

3 Comments

Today I attended my second ever MCM Comic Con! This was the first time I’ve put together a costume and became a cosplayer! I’ve been sure I wanted to cosplay someone from Star Wars for a while and then I saw The Force Awakens *cough, three times, cough* I was sure I wanted to be Rey. Here was this absolutely incredible character, she was strong, she kicked ass and this was something I could make. So for the past few months Ali and I looked up parts for costumes, Ali’s took a lot more work than mine and is so realistic I can’t begin to describe just how awesome it looks. I was still stitching mine this morning (while Ali had fixed up my awesome hair do) and had to do a few adjustments at Con as well…hey, I’m still learning.

One of the things I love most about Con is how creative people are. You just look at some people and are in awe of their talent and creativity, I hope that one day I can do something so that someone might think that of me. Ali and I did get quite a few comments and smiles through the day. The best part for me though was when I saw kids who thought we were Rey and another Jedi. The kids in my building were left open-mouthed, whispering as we went past ‘They’re Jedi!’, it was so much fun just to see their faces. We were walking around with Ben and Abbie, just looking around, laughing, oh and buying…

 

Aside from the amazing stacks of Funko Pops around (yes, I have to be very careful with my spending and have saved up for Con for MONTHS before) there is also Artist’s Alley, a hub of incredible talent. I picked up so many different prints and pieces of artwork. It’s hard to explain how amazing it is to see and talk to these artists about their work and get customs done, things like that. You really never know what you’re going to find, it’s something Abbie and I get really excited about it.

It was nice to have Comic Con to look forward to after all the stresses of assignments last month, I just got to hang out with my friends, wear a costume I was comfortable in and just be the huge geek I am inside. Am I already planning October? You bet I am.

Book Review: The Storyteller – Jodi Picoult

2 Comments

15992579

Imagine living a life where destroying others made you a good person.

Imagine living a life where the monsters you imagined suddenly became real. 

Imagine a revelation and story leaving you trying to make sense of the world

past and present.

This review was originally published in 2013, I was incredibly lucky that Jodi and her publishers became aware of it and posted it worldwide, I also got the opportunity to speak to Jodi and it was one of the best days of my life. So here is the piece of work that means the most to me.

Welcome to the world of The Storyteller, Jodi Picoult’s brand new and breathtaking novel. From the very beginning you are caught up in Picoult’s world, arguably more seamlessly than any other novel. Yet again she has created an entire novel from a simple moral question, someone who committed murder asks for your forgiveness, what would you do? Ok maybe it’s a little bit more complicated but this simple seed quickly branches out and has you deep in thought as you read. Sage Singer is a baker, she works at night alone as she cannot face the world seeing her scars, she later meets an elderly man who for the first time is someone she can talk to apart from her boss.  Imagine he tells you he needs your help, he wants you to help him die but before you do that you need to forgive him for helping to murder millions of people. Hooked yet? I certainly was.

A bit of context might help here. I waited for months and months for this novel to be released, imagine how excited I was when my boyfriend managed to get hold of a copy for me from the United States before it was released in the U.K. The novel combines some of my favourite things, Jodi Picoult novels, historical fiction, learning about the Holocaust and divided perspective, oh and a poke at Fifty Shades of Grey ( I did chuckle a lot at one simple joke). My own personal fascination with the Holocaust both the survivors and those lost started when I was looking at the period at the age of 11, I would trawl through accounts of the survivors both horrified and hooked at the same time. I think this is what makes The Storyteller even more fascinating, from picking up any of Picoult’s novel you will know that she does her research thoroughly but this is something else entirely. On the one hand you have the character of Minka who tells the story of a Holocaust survivor, an incredible tale. I had to remind myself that this was fictional, simply as the sheer amount of detail that has gone into Minka’s section was amazing if you were given this and not told it was written by an author you would genuinely believe it was a real survivor’s story. What is incredible also is how Picoult has woven Minka’s story ideas into the novel, at first I was a little thrown but they match the plot line perfectly and give really interesting ideas that I never would of thought of on my own and show the humanity in others as well.   To combat this however the reader is also given an equally shocking story beforehand, although this one made me sick to the stomach. SS officer Josef’s story was beyond belief, from the beginnings of Nazi Germany where young boys were pretty much brainwashed into being brutes (not that I think this is an excuse at all)  and then either went insane from their ‘duties’ or had to drink themselves stupid just to try and  forget  (see even you are feeling some mild sympathy, the brilliance of the author!), because at the end of the day no matter how monstrous and vile they were human…one point in time at least.

I cannot fault this novel in any way (as my readers will know if I don’t like something, I really don’t like something) and ending was incredible and so shocking not even a hardcore fan could work it out! The different perspectives are incredible too because it leave you having sympathy for characters you really feel you shouldn’t. I think that although Minka and Josef’s story will dominate the reader, Sage and another character (who I will not give away as I don’t want to ruin the surprise) present a modern perspective which is needed in this type of novel. The division Sage feels towards Josef as an old man and him in his youth tears the reader apart too, so does her turmoil over her grandmother, a Holocaust survivor. I cried though this novel, sometimes I had to put it down because it was so hard to process but within minutes it was back in my hands. Why do I like The Storyteller most of all though? Because even in one of the darkest parts of history and in the presence of the most revolting crimes against humans you still feel that there is light, that humanity still exists.

So to end, this novel made me want to live, it made me want to live for those who survived and those who didn’t.

***** five stars (although this doesn’t seem enough) released in the UK on the 26th March.

Chloe Metzger – a lifelong fan.

I have something to tell you!!

Leave a comment

13177376_1303344063026342_8798115108548652260_n

I have been trying to keep this in for what feels like SO long, although it’s actually been a few weeks. My band, No People Club, have been booked to go back to Basingstoke Live again this year on the MAIN STAGE! Basingstoke Live is the biggest free festival in the South East!  Now, I love the Amped tent, I’ve been regularly sitting for hours every summer watching the acts and I’ve played it twice but this is a new adventure. We will be on the biggest stage at 7pm, eeeek! I’ve watched this stage for years and it’s so big and just looked like so much fun and we got the email on a day where I really needed cheering up. We’re all about to graduate and don’t know what the future holds for the five of us, but you can be damn sure we’re going to party it up!

 

Get to know me – 100 random questions

2 Comments

For the past week I know there have been some heavy posts for Mental Health Awareness Week, thank you to everyone to read, commented, contacted me it meant a lot. For tonight, however, I thought I’d so something a little fun and a post that meant my new followers and subscribers could get to know me a little better! So here are 100 random questions!

Who is your hero?

J.K Rowling I think, someone who didn’t give up. A true hero to me.

If you could live anywhere, where would it be?

In a large house that has a personal library, gym room and pool. You know, not much.

What is your biggest fear?

Losing the people I love.

What is your favourite family vacation?

Florida!!

What would you change about yourself if you could?

That I didn’t care what others thought of me.

What really makes you angry?

When people think mental health is a joke.

c4d91b91f1bfebfe7dc9cb5c0740614f

What motivates you to work hard?

My past and how good my future can be.

What is your favorite thing about your career?

I don’t have one yet!

What is your biggest complaint about your job?

When people don’t look for themselves before asking me.

What is your proudest accomplishment?

Right now, my KU Talent Award but in a few month’s time achieving my degree 🙂

11050314_10153704024088206_4197782836317781087_n

What is your child’s proudest accomplishment?

I mean the only children I have are my hamsters…they’re late night gymnastics.

What is your favourite book to read?

Harry Potter.

What makes you laugh the most?

Ali, it’s one of the many reasons I love him.

What was the last movie you went to? What did you think?

Civil War! So good!

What did you want to be when you were small?

It regularly changed, but it was definitely musical theatre actress for a long time and I really tried hard.

What does your child want to be when he/she grows up?

WHY DO YOU PEOPLE KEEP ASKING ABOUT MY NON EXISTENT CHILDREN. When I have kids they can be whatever they want to be.

If you could choose to do anything for a day, what would it be?

Be a guy, because it’s something I’ll never be able to experience.

What is your favourite game or sport to watch and play?

None, I’m not a sports person.

Would you rather ride a bike, ride a horse, or drive a car?

I’d love to go back and ride a horse with no worries, but I guess I’ll just stick to a car for now 🙂

IMG_1645

What would you sing at Karaoke night?

Some upbeat pop punk!

What two radio stations do you listen to in the car the most?

If I listen to the radio it’ll be Heart or Radio 1.

Which would you rather do: wash dishes, mow the lawn, clean the bathroom, or vacuum the house?

Vaccum the house, easiest and less gross.

If you could hire someone to help you, would it be with cleaning, cooking, or yard work?

Probably the garden, if I had to pick one, don’t like people being in some parts of my home, it’s a calm space I don’t want invaded.

If you could only eat one meal for the rest of your life, what would it be?

Breaded Chicken and Chips 🙂

Who is your favourite author?

Hard choice, such a hard choice. J K Rowling probably, closely followed by Jodi Picoult.

Have you ever had a nickname? What is it?

Chlo-bo, because it rhymed.

Do you like or dislike surprises? Why or why not?

I like them if I know nothing until I’m surprised. If I’m told about it and have to wait then I hate it.

Would you rather vacation in Hawaii or Alaska and why? 

Definitely Hawaii, I’ve always wanted to go and see the culture, the beaches, the sights.

Would you rather win the lottery or work the perfect job?

If I won the lottery I’d have the time to become a writer, if I had the perfect job I’d be a writer. So either one is good 🙂

75dc57f6613fb311355c98a37b155319

Who would you want to be stranded on a desert island with? 

Ali, I already know I can live with him and have a good time.

If money was no object, what would you do all day? 

Write, read and be creative.

If you could go back in time what year would you travel to? 

1986, I’d go and see Queen live at Wembley.

How would your friends describe you?

Funny, Hardworking, Loving

What are your hobbies? 

Writing, Reading, Sketching, Cosplay

IMG_7225

What is the best gift you’ve ever been given? 

My rings, one from Ali, one from my parents. They mean the most of me.

What’s the worst gift you’ve ever received? 

Gone off chocolate

Aside from necessities, what one thing could you not go a day without?

My phone, it keeps me connected to everything.

List two pet peeves 

Rude People and People who don’t cover their nose and mouth when they cough/ sneeze.

Where do you see yourself in five years? 

With a house, a job I enjoy and I’m good at and married…we’ll see about anything else.

How many pairs of shoes do you own? 

So many I haven’t even counted.

If you were a superhero what powers would you have? 

Telekinesis.

What would you do if you won the lottery? 

Buy a big house, remodel a lot of it, put in a library and indoor pool, take my family on a huge shopping spree, buy a new car, get a load of pets. SO MUCH TO DO. Basically I’d want to treat everyone I love as well as myself. Think of all the books I could buy…all the books.

What form of public transport do you prefer? 

The train, as long as I can sit down.

What’s your favourite zoo animal? 

Monkeys/ Gorillas. I just want to play with them all.

If you could go back in time and change something what would it be? 

I don’t think I’d change anything because of the repercussions it might have on my life now. Everything happens for a reason.

If you share a meal with and 4 individuals, living or dead, who would it be? 

J.K Rowling, Freddie Mercury, Sylvia Plath and Hayley Williams.

How many pillows do you sleep with?

As many as possible. At the flat 2 big fluffy ones, at my Mum’s 2 normal pillows then about 4 small pillows. I like pillows.

IMG_5091

What’s the longest you’ve gone without sleep and why? 

I think about 24 hours, probably after a long flight.

What the tallest building you’ve been to the top in?

The Shard I think.

Would you rather trade intelligence for looks or looks for intelligence? 

Looks for intelligence, because that won’t fade.

How often do you buy clothes? 

Probably more than I should…I don’t let myself go into Primark anymore.

Have you ever had a secret admirer? 

Nope.

What’s your favourite holiday? 

Hmm it’s between Florida and Greece, very different atmospheres.

11427692_10153960834883206_6355274486653947456_n

What’s the most daring thing you’ve ever done? 

I think horse riding.

What’s the last thing you recorded on TV? 

I actually can’t remember, I can’t record any TV in the flat!

What was the last book you read? 

I Call Myself a Feminist.

What’s your favourite type of foreign food? 

Italian, closely followed by Chinese.

Are you a clean or a messy person? 

Whenever I’m productive, I’m messy.

Who would play you in a movie of your life? 

Emma Stone.

How long does it take you to get ready in the morning?

From waking up to getting out the door (including breakfast) about an hour- an hour and a half.

What kitchen appliance do you use every day? 

Kettle, I need a good cup of tea to function. If I don’t have the time I have to get one to go.

IMG_6632

What’s your favourite fast food chain? 

Probably KFC

What’s your favourite family recipe? 

Bacon Pasta

Do you love or hate roller coasters? 

It used to be love but I’m not sure now, haven’t been able to go on one in so long!

What’s your favourite family tradition? 

Easter Egg Hunt

What’s your favourite childhood memory?

Watching the parade at Disneyland Paris

What is your favourite movie? 

Too hard to choose, NEXT!

How old were you when you learned Santa wasn’t real? How did you feel?

…Older than I want to admit and very sad.

Is your glass half full or half empty? 

Half full 🙂

e6f961090dc9f551c31d1466268101a5

What’s the craziest thing you’ve done in the name of love? 

I’m not sure…

What 3 items would you take with you on a desert island? 

Chest full of books, Nutella and my old teddy bear.

What was your favourite subject in school? 

English or Drama

What’s the most unusual thing you’ve ever eaten? 

Nothing, I’m not adventurous with food.

Do you collect anything? 

Harry Potter memorabilia and Funko Pop Vinyls

Is there anything you wish would come back into fashion? 

Nope, not a fashion person, I just wear what I like.

Which or your five sense would you say is the strongest? 

Smell, definitely smell.

Have you ever had a surprise party? (that was actually a surprise) 

Nope!

Are you related or distantly related to anyone famous? 

Not in the slightest.

What do you do to keep fit? 

Gym once a week at least, more if I possibly can.

IMG_6882

Does your family have a motto – spoken or unspoken? 

Not that I know of?

If you were ruler of your own country what would be the first law you would introduce? 

Two days a month are given off of school, work etc so that people can be creative for a full 48 hours.

IMG_0570

Who was your favorite teacher in school and why?

Mrs McGrath when I was little she was amazing and taught me so much about art and history and encouraged my love of music, english and drama.

What three things do you think of the most each day?

Food, my writing, family and friends.

If you had a warning label, what would yours say?

Extreme caution when tired.

What song would you say best sums you up?

No idea, it really depends on my mood.

What celebrity would you like to meet at Starbucks for a cup of coffee?

Emma Stone.

Who was your first crush?

I can’t remember at all.

What’s the most interesting thing you can see out of your office or kitchen window?

People on the street below

On a scale of 1-10 how funny would you say you are?

I’d say a good 7

Where do you see yourself in 10 years? 

In a good job position and with children.

What was your first job? 

Working at a cinema.

If you could join any past or current music group which would you want to join?

The 6th Spice Girl.

How many languages do you speak?

One.

What is your favourite family holiday tradition? 

Breakfast at the airport.

Who is the most intelligent person you know? 

One of my lecturers, his mind is incredible.

If you had to describe yourself as an animal, which one would it be? 

Dolphin – playful, loyal, intelligent, waterlover.

What is one thing you’ll never do again? 

Live with people I’ve never met before.

Who knows you best? 

Ali, he knows absolutely everything there is to know, we have no secrets.

img_6433

Anything else you want to ask? Leave me a comment below!

Mental Health Awareness Week : Today 

Leave a comment

Today I needed to be away from a screen, I needed a warm bath, a nap and quality time with Ali. Basically I needed to take some time for myself because I’m tired and a little low but I know after a good nights sleep I should be much better and ‘fuzzy head’ should clear, at least a little. 
Love, 

Chloe 

Am I Supposed To Know Yet?

1 Comment

a0e01a07579c4e676ce0f05121aa5955

It’s been a few weeks now since everything was submitted and I’ve been swaying between getting super organised and having loads to do and having hardly anything to do. I didn’t expect to have a job straight away but getting rejection email after rejection email isn’t fun and has kind of put a dampener on this week. It’s also made me think a lot about what I want to do, who I want to be. There’s all these questions that people ask me about life where I’m going to live, what I’m going to do, what my future plans are blah, blah, blah. The funny thing is they expect me to know all this…am I supposed to?

From the friends I’ve spoken to most of us feel this way, the whole what am I meant to do now? Is on everyone’s minds, as well as trying to work out who I am again? I’ve had a whole life here, people have known me for who I’ve been at uni, not my past. I guess that’s a huge reservation I have about moving back to my home town. I can’t stand to see the people I went to school with, who bullied me because I’m not that girl anymore. I wish I didn’t care what anyone thought but let’s be honest, how many 21 year olds do you know who don’t care one bit what anyone thinks, really.

I searched for a quote, because sometimes the folks on Pinterest say exactly what I’m feeling when I can’t put it into words and of course Queen Emma Watson says what I was thinking. I want to use this time to kind of work out who I am post-uni, work out what I want and all this stuff but I think I’m just a little nervous, a little terrified. I’m still unsure but I guess that’s normal and hopefully I’ll figure it out along the way.

 

Busted 2016

Leave a comment

IMG_7316

Tonight I got to see one of my absolute favourite bands from my childhood, Busted! It was these three guys that made me fall in love with the sound of guitars and pop rock in general. This is technically the second time I’ve seen them, but the first I was super sick and could only stay for two songs before my parents had to take me home 😦 Tonight though I managed to pick up super cheap tickets (half of the price) from someone who couldn’t go, offered one to the lovely Abbie and got to watch the opening night of Busted’s reunion tour Pigs Can Fly. I originally had tickets for the O2 Arena date but it clashed with Comic Con so I had to sell them, you can imagine how excited I was to find some last minute tickets. It was also amazing to see my favourite YouTuber perform for the first time and at Wembley Arena! Emma Blackery was amazing and her new music is sounding incredible. Whetus also supported and were…interesting but bought the house down with Teenage Dirtbag. I don’t want to say too much about the visuals, because I don’t want to ruin it for fans who are going to be seeing the tour later on. I laughed, sang, danced (well my equivalent of dancing) and just felt so happy that Busted were back because you never really forget the first band you fell in love with, do you?

One of my favourites performed at Abbey Road earlier this year

 

Home is where my heart is 

4 Comments


I’ve been a little off the grid for the past few days because I drove back to my first home to be with mine and Ali’s families and recharge. This is only going to be a short blog, but hopefully a heartfelt one. I spent a lot of time having ill feeling about my town, I didn’t want to come back. Good things are from here but there are bad too. I guess I was scared I’d slip back into my scared teenager self by being here but if the past few days have shown anything its that I’m different now. I’m stronger, happier and healthier. I know there will be struggles but I’m not worried about facing them here anymore. I’m looking forward to making more memories with all of my crazy family and Ali’s too, while being who I am now.