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Book Review: Heartstopper vol 3 - Alice Oseman

Book Review: Heartstopper Volume 3 – Alice Oseman

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I have to warn you at the very start of this review that it has spoilers for volume 1 and 2 so make sure you read those before this because of SPOILERS! Now you’ve been warned on to the review.

In this volume we’ll see the Heartstopper gang go on a school trip to Paris! Not only are Nick and Charlie navigating a new city, but also telling more people about their relationship AND learning more about the challenges each other are facing in private…

Meanwhile Tao and Elle will face their feelings for each other, Tara and Darcy share more about their relationship origin story, and the teachers supervising the trip seem… rather close…?

So I’m pretty loud about the fact that I love the Heartstopper series, it’s one of my favourites and a go to if I want cheering up. So I’ve definitely been counting down to the release of volume 3, Nick and Charlie firmly have a place in my heart. In this volume they get to know each other better and their relationship gets deeper.

What I really appreciated in this volume is that while Nick and Charlie are still very much in the honeymoon stage, they are getting to know each other better still. There are things that they need to learn about each other in terms of family, emotions and their own hearts.

The fact that this also took place in France was really fun, it added another element to the story as well as the development of the world that Alice has created. Also, she’s an incredible artist – I fell right into the city of love through the pages of this volume. We also get to know Nick and Charlie’s friends even better and they have their own lives which are seamlessly intertwined within the story.

It’s worth mentioning that there is a huge number of people that are part of the LGBTQ commnity in Alice’s books. We have those from all walks of life within the pages, at times I think it can be interesting but then I started thinking and actually there are probably more people you know that are part of the LGBTQ community than you know.

Some parts are harder to read and I would look up some trigger warnings if you are sensitive to certain topics (I don’t want to mention them here because they could be spoilery).

This was another 5 star read for me. I’m definitely going to get my hands on Alice’s other books because I think she is super talented. I’ve also been convincing every to pick up Heartstopper because I just love it so much and can’t stop gushing.

Book Review: Break The Fall - Jennifer Iacopelli

Book Review: Break The Fall – Jennifer Iacopelli

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Audrey Lee is going to the Olympics. A year ago, she could barely do a push up as she recovered from spine surgery, one that could have paralyzed her. And now? She’s made the United States’ gymnastics team with her best friend, Emma, just like they both dreamed about since they were kids. She’s on top of the world.

The pressure for perfection is higher than ever when horrifying news rips the team apart. Audrey is desperate to advocate for her teammate who has been hurt by the one person they trusted most–but not all the gymnasts are as supportive.

The stories of abuse that came from the USA gymnastics team were horrible, young women had put their trust into people to help them achieve their dreams only to be mistreated. Of course, if you do struggle with abuse narratives think about that before reading, however, this is not graphic.

I actually got a copy of this over Christmas while I was working in a bookshop as it was sent from the publisher. Since reading it I haven’t shut up because it is an excellent novel. I couldn’t put this book down and when I had to I was still thinking about it.

I have to admit that this had a personal connection for me. I haven’t read a YA book that tackled spinal injuries before and I was sure that the author had experienced spinal trauma. The description of the pain, the complicated feelings about your body etc. I actually reached out to Jennifer and she was lovely and had written those parts based on research which just impressed me even more.

The character of Audrey is easy to connect with and you really do feel for her and the rest of her teammates as your reading. Additionally, there is a real sense of the pressure these young women face, the fact that they have trained their whole lives for something only for it to be derailed at the last minute.

I think it also helps that the author has first-hand experience of gymnastics after reporting on the Olympics previously and you can tell that she understands the competition and what can happen in competition. I was completely gripped during the competition chapters, racing towards the end because I needed to know what happened.

This is going to be an important novel for 2020, we’re seeing non-fiction about the Me Too and Times Up era, this is the start of a new wave of fiction based on the aftermath. I’m pleased to see novels like this opening up the conversation and giving another dimension to it as well.

Is it any wonder that I gave this 5 stars? It absolutely incredible and so well written. In fact I’ve been recommending it to so many people. Also, just for me, it was nice to see representation post injury because it’s just something that I don’t see ever. Also, I’m definitely going to be watching the Gymnastics at Tokyo!

Heading To The Aisle – Finding My Wedding Dress!

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A few weeks ago my Mumma and I headed down to Brighton and Hove with one thing in mind, to try and find my wedding dress. I’ve been looking for a long time now trying to find a shop with dresses that I liked.

I scoured website after website and kept coming back to one based in Brighton, Ocean Bridal. They seemed to have a huge mix of dresses and more than a few that I liked the look of, it also helped that when emailing I was in contact with a wonderful woman called Simone. She made me feel so relaxed about coming when I had been tying myself up in knots over it.

We were originally due to go back in November but due to some personal reasons we had to rearrange, which was not a problem at all and made me even more determined to get to this shop.

The shop itself is in Hove, a 5 minute train journey from Brighton itself and just around the corner from the station. We were greeted with a huge smile and while we waited for a few minutes met some other lovely members of staff including 2 very cute dogs.

Once in we explained it was the first wedding dress shop I’d been in for myself and I’d never put on a wedding dress before. I’d sent a few in advance that I wanted to try but was encouraged to look around and pick a few more and during the process Simone would pick a few more she thought I might like.

For someone who is incredibly self conscious trying on new clothes and gets super anxious in changing rooms I had the best time. You know they say you know your dress as soon as you put it on? I knew. I knew that dress was the one. I put it on and my reaction was ‘oh’. I felt the most beautiful I had ever felt. Bare in mind this wasn’t in my size and the final will fit like a glove.

I tried on more dresses after that but kept coming back to the first one. Nothing made me feels as good or confident. I didn’t see my flaws in that dress I just saw me and I couldn’t stop smiling. I found my dress and more importantly I felt like a damn movie star with no pressure to lose weight to fit in in or change myself. I felt beautiful.

Now, this is a difficult post to write because I can’t tell you anything! It’s not just because I’m excited to for it to be a surprise for my guests but ALSO my super sneaky fiancé has been trying to do some snooping as to which dress I got! Thankfully, I have no pictures of it on my phone (at my own request) and I am more determined than ever to keep this a secret…but the below photo gives you an idea of how excited I am and how hard it’s going to be to keep this a secret for 11 months.

Anyone want to take a guess at the kind of dress I’ll be wearing? Leave a comment below!

What Today Means To Me

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While I would love to just count today as another day, as the end of the long month of January, I would be feigning ignorance. Today the United Kingdom left the European Union – ultimately it’s a part of history I’m witnessing, so of course I was going to write about it.

Today I feel incredibly sad and let down. I feel anxious about the future of my country, worried for those in it who are vulnerable because I cannot and will not see this as a victory. People voted for uncertainty, they also voted for promises that were uncovered to be lies.

I have people in my life on both sides of the vote, that I love and care about. While we might not see eye to eye, everyone is entitled to an opinion and a vote. What bothers me is that those in government that mislead the public have not been held to account. What bothers me is when hate and division was used in a campaign that should have been educated and informed.

Mostly I want my international friends to know that I am sorry for the fact you’ve had to apply for ‘settled status’, that you’ve had to hear rhetoric about ‘taking back Britain’. In my experience those who have chosen to come and live and work in this country are intelligent and wonderful people giving to our society.

I hope that this doesn’t drive division even further. That we can still stand together against those who will used this for prejudice or hate. I hope that the good in people will overcome.

I am still European and nothing will change that.

My September 2019 Book Haul!

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Hello, hello, hello

After YALC back in July you might have thought my book buying/acquisition might have slowed down, you would be wrong. With the combination of my birthday and new releases I picked up a LOT of books in September and I wanted to share them with you all. Get ready it’s going to be a long one.

First up are books I won in a Twitter giveaway that arrived at the beginning on the month. The lovely Sara Barnard gave away all of the books she has written, they’re all signed an dedicated too which is super sweet. So I now have Goodbye Perfect, Fierce Fragile Hearts, Beautiful Broken Things and A Quiet Kind of Thunder. These are all based around friendship which is super exciting and a few I’ve had on my list for a while.

I was also sent Sara’s collaborative book Floored along with other great YA authors. Next up are two buy one get one free buys, Heartstream a YA thriller that I bought alongside this months book club read Once Upon a River I’m not sure what to say about this one it’s kind of an adult mystery?

I also had my copy of The Only Plane In The Sky – The Oral History of 9/11 delivered, this book is full of accounts of 9/11 and I think it’s an important and interesting way to preserve what happened and the changes that the event caused.

I received 4 books for my birthday. The first up A Large Expanse of Sea from my parents which I’ve been meaning to pick up forever. I also received 2 books from my friend Charissa (along with a doughnut because, goals) The Confessions of Frannie Langton an adult mystery and Two Can Keep A Secret which I needed to read after McManus’s debut. I also received Laura Dean Keeps Breaking Up With Me, I’ve heard great things about this online so I’m excited!

Ok, I’ll fess up I made two drunken purchases – I actually snuck off from a night out to buy books (maximum nerd points), which were It Never Rains and Life of the Party I just picked these up after reading the blurb, I have no idea if they’re going to be good but I’m hoping so.

My preorder of The Deathless Girls, a novel I’ve been keeping an eye out for about the brides of Dracula, perfect for Autumn. My next few books are from a trip to Foyles with my birthday money, because what else was I going to spend it on? I knew nothing about The Liar’s Daughter it’s about the aftermath of a young woman who grew up in a cult. I find these super interesting.

Can we take a second to appreciate the stunning cover of Ziggy, Stardust & Me a LGBTQ YA novel set in the 70s. I also finally picked up With The Fire On High which I’ve heard nothing but good things about. Also, Monday’s Not Coming is another I’ve heard a lot of good things about on BookTube. I was also given a copy of Archie 1941 for my birthday and I love it – I can’t wait to see others in this series.

P.S, I Love you is one of my favourite books so of course I ordered the sequel Postscript and I am so excited to see what Holly is up to now. I also love the film but for very different reasons. I also received a Waterstones gift card and picked up the graphic novel of Speak which has stunning artwork, even though I haven’t read the original book. I also bought City of Ghosts by Victoria Schwab because she’s amazing.

And now I need to find a home for all of them, the floorboards definitely hate me right now!

Have you read any of these? What would you recommend? Let me know below.

Feeling Politically Homeless

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You *might* have noticed that the UK is going through it with politics at the moment. Now, it’s been over 3 years since it was voted that we would leave the European Union. Personally, it’s not something I voted for but I had to accept that it was going to happen.

In those 3 years we’ve seen, to put it bluntly, a shit show. 3 Prime Ministers, a load of resignations, a rise in hate crime and a wave of anxiety about the future of the country that I’m in. Brexit has caused a horrible divide or maybe it just highlighted it.

What it has left in its wake is a load of people who feel politically homeless. In the repeated calls for a general election I genuinely didn’t know who I would vote for. I look at the political parties of the UK right now and not one of them makes me have hope. That’s a pretty scary thought.

In the past I have voted Labour, I felt that they were the major party I could support. Now, I don’t know – while Jeremy Corbyn when he became party leader seemed different and I was hopeful I’m done. I don’t know him personally but politically I’m not impressed and he needs to go.

Looking into alternatives none of them quite sit right with me either. While Green has views similar to mine I don’t know if they could run the country and I don’t trust the Liberal Democrats after they helped triple tuition fees.

What I do know is that this country needs change. It needs leadership that is invested in LISTENING, not just shouting and trying to be the loudest voice. Boris Johnson doesn’t seem to understand this concept.

I truly hope in my lifetime we will see a revolution and a return to working together rather than tearing each other apart. Right now, as I watch parliament debate and try to score cheap points at each other with jibes and cheers I am frustrated. We need to fix this country before it breaks to a point where we cannot repair it.

I guess I’m writing with an open heart here. Is this the most eloquent post

My YALC 2019 Haul Part 2

My YALC 2019 Haul Part 2

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Yesterday I shared with you the first part of my YALC Haul and some of the 25 (!!) books that came back home with me. Are you ready for part 2? I definitely am!

The blurb of All The Invisible Things says that this is great for ‘fans of Laura Steven and Holly Bourne’ with strong feminist feels. Yes please!

Towards the end of the day I also picked up an exclusive copy of This Time Will Be Different by Misa Sugiura. I’ve heard a lot about this on Booktube from those across the pond – it focuses on family and finding something to fight for.

I also found a poetry book at YALC! I hope there will be more to come in the future. I picked up There Are More Beautiful Things Than Beyoncé by Morgan Parker which I’ve seen around for a while. I’m interested to see what it’s about.

Another popular Booktube novel I’ve seen constantly in the past few months is Frankly in Love by David Yoon, I picked this up free when I bought another book on the Penguin stand. My copy also has a YALC exclusive cover, yay! It’s all about love, family and tradition. I can’t wait to read this one.

Who else read Sarah Dessen as a teen? I certainly did. So I picked up her latest novel with her new publisher. The Rest Of The Story is about Emma connecting and learning about her mother’s family, who she hasn’t spent much time with since she died. This is going to hit me in the feels isn’t it?

I hadn’t heard of A Good Hiding before YALC it features a teenage pregnancy, a friendship and I *think* it has some LGBT rep too, I’ll keep you posted.

So, Olivia Twist, a gender swap Oliver Twist – do I need to say any more? GENDER SWAP OLIVER TWIST. I hope we get a male Nancy equivalent.

Watch Us Rise by Renée Watson and Ellen Hagan has been on my radar for a while. There’s feminism, friendship and teenage activism. That’s all I know but that is all I need to know.

I was a big fan of Meredith Russo’s first novel and she’s back with another one that looks to be incredible. This follows two friends throughout their lives and had LGBTQ rep! Yessss! I’m excited.

Lily’s Just Fine is another book that I didn’t know about but I found it on a stall for the steal price of £4 and got it signed by the author. This is a contemporary romance with ‘Scotland’s most determined teenager’. Sounded like a bit of light fun to read so of course I picked it up.

And again, I hadn’t heard of Battle Ground BUT it’s set in a post Brexit dystopian world and I got chatting to the author who also signed it for me. I’m curious to see what literature comes out of Brexit and this is the first YA book about it I’ve come across.

Romanov is a reimagining of Anastasia with magic, that’s all I know but I loved the film Anastasia as a kid so why not pick this one up?

And last but not least I picked up Misfit by Charli Howard, I picked this up so that I could get my free copy of Frankly in Love and it was the first YALC purchase I read! It was an ok read for me, it’s Charli’s memoir of her life as a model and dealing with eating disorders. It was a 3 star read for me.

Now, how about a BONUS! I know this was meant to be about the books but I did pick up these from Fable and Black and look how cute these are! Look!

Are you looking to pick up any of these books? Were you at YALC? Let me know in the comments below!

Book Review: That’s Not What Happened – Kody Keplinger

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“It’s been three years since the Virgil County High School shooting. Three years since my best friend, Sarah, was killed in a bathroom stall. Everyone knows Sarah’s story. 

But it’s not true.”

Faced with the 3rd anniversary of the shooting, Lee is starting to feel suffocated by the pressure of truth. With the lies of the circumstances of Sarah’s death getting bigger and bigger Lee knows it’s time to tell the truth, even if it could ruin absolutely everything. As a way of dealing with the tragedy before leaving for college, Lee encourages all of the survivors to write their own letters and the consequences aren’t what she expects…

I’ve never read a novel by Kody Keplinger before but I was intrigued by this one. It has an interesting concept and I really enjoyed that it was a mix of traditional prose and letters. The fact that Kepplinger made each letter really fit with an individual character showed a real talent.

Of course, this isn’t an easy book to read. It does go into quite a lot of detail in regards to a school shooting, dealing with PTSD after the event and the effects that something like this would have on the entire town. I’d definitely keep that in mind before picking up the novel as it’s not going to be a cheerful one.

I was also surprised a few times within the book, while I thought I knew what was going to happen there were revelations. Each of the characters were fleshed out to have their own lives, their own hopes and fears and while we see these through Lee’s eyes it made the novel stand out to me.

There are parallels, I’ve been told, with the story of a young woman who was killed in the Columbine shooting in 1999. Some people have seen this as a reason to slate the novel, however, I don’t think that’s a terrible thing. She has simply taken a similar story and built her own around it. Bare in mind that this is targeted at young adults, I myself was 4 years old when Columbine happened – I knew nothing about it. So it may not be as obvious to younger readers.

I gave this novel 4.5 stars, I was really impressed by the amount of depth that each of the characters had and their own accounts of the story. I definitely want to read more of Keplinger’s books and would recommend this as a thoughtful read.

My Mental Health – MHW2019

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Seeing as it’s Mental Health Week, it only seems right that I talk about myself. For those of you who have read my blog for a long time, you’ll know it’s something I’m pretty open about but that took a while, for the first few months after my depression diagnosis I couldn’t even say the word.

So, what’s my diagnosis?

I have been officially diagnosed with Anxiety with Depression, why is it put that way I have no idea.

How long have I been diagnosed?

I was diagnosed at 19, shortly before I went to study at university.

How does it impact me day to day?

Sometimes it doesn’t impact me at all, those are good days. Other days I’ll feel exhausted, irritable, moody. I can struggle to have any motivation or really doubt myself and my abilities.

What’s my treatment plan?

Currently, I take Citalopram, an antidepressant and have done for the past few years. Also, because I realised I was struggling more than normal I am on a waiting list to have 1-1 therapy to talk things out and try and get myself back in a good place mentally.

How am I doing right now?

I’m doing okay. There are days I feel like I’ve got my shit together and I’m doing so well and other days I struggle to get up from my sofa or to reply to any messages. Every day is different. I know I haven’t had the easiest time with my mental health recently, despite life going well, because of that I’m eager to get some talking therapy and feel much better.

Thank you so much for reading! There are more posts for Mental Health Awareness Week coming up so make sure to check back in!

7 Tips For Going To Events Alone

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It may surprise the people that know me, but going to social events gets me all kinds of wound up. In fact, before going out I’m usually a completely anxious mess. As times gone on I’ve gotten better at dealing with it – a far cry from my student days when I would get stupidly drunk before going out so I wasn’t as anxious. Would not recommend.

As a result of Ali’s job he often has to miss events – whether that’s a birthday night out, dinners or family gatherings in the past year and a half I’ve had to get used to going alone. As much as I am independent, it is nicer going to an event with someone you love rather than on your lonesome. It doesn’t mean I enjoy it, but I have my own ways of either hyping myself up or having plans for if I’m not feeling great.

It got me thinking, I’m sure I’m not the only one having to face going to events alone! Whether that be social or otherwise so why not put down what helps me?

Make sure you feel confident and comfortable in what you’re wearing

If I’m going to feel good mentally, I want to feel confident in the way I look. Making the effort to go outside? At nighttime no less? You bet I’m going to look good! I quite enjoy making a fuss of myself getting ready with some good music blasting, taking time to do my make up and generally feeling good about myself. It puts me in a much better mindset.

That said I’ll also think about what I’ll be comfortable in, if I’m going for a big dinner I’m not going to be wearing tight jeans or a fitted dress! Hello skater dresses

Don’t be afraid to let friends know you’re feeling it a little bit

When I went out for my birthday last year I was really apprehensive. To be honest, I really missed Ali, it was my second birthday apart from him and I didn’t know if I wanted to bother. A few friends of mine had to cancel and I just felt down.

I didn’t make a secret of this to my friends. I simply explained that I was missing him, but I wanted to spend time with them, just give me a minute to get in the groove! And it worked!

Give yourself some ‘me time’ before or after

I’m an introvert and navigating parties and such alone can be exhausting! Because of this I try to make sure that I have some time to myself either before (a relaxing shower and pamper session) or the next day I might curl up with a good book and my own company!

Find something you’re looking forward to in each event

It could be that the place you’re going to eat does really good dessert. You might be seeing friends you haven’t spent time with in a while, there will be something in each event for you to look forward to! Focus on those rather than the things you’re feeling anxious about!

If you don’t want to drink, then don’t!

If you’re going out normally people are having a drink or two but sometimes you might not feel like it. And that’s ok!!! I’ve had to learn that just because other people are drinking, it doesn’t mean that I have to!

In the past I’ve drunk far too much when I’ve felt sad or lonely and you know what? It just made me feel worse, not better! Now I can be pretty comfortable to just not drink and mocktails are much cheaper!

Appreciate the time you’re spending with friends or family

I absolutely love my friends and family, when I go out I try to take pictures and remember every detail for later when I can excitedly share my day with Ali.

Going to these things alone can make me feel a little lonely but I’m not going to let that ruin the time I have with other people in my life! They know I appreciate them and their time!

Have an ‘escape plan’

I wondered whether to put this one in, but I want to be honest. There are times when I am struggling and the only way I can persuade myself to go out is knowing that if it gets too much I can leave or step out for a minute.

This might be as simple as popping to the toilet for 10 minutes if I feel anxious or driving myself to the event so I don’t have to rely on anyone else for a lift. It’s giving myself that feeling of having control over my anxiety rather than the other way around.

Is there anything else you’d add? Let me know in the comments below!