Category: feminism

Feminist Fridays: Back to the Archives My First Public Feminism Post

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For this weeks Feminist Friday, I wanted to take you back to the first post where I unapologetically called myself a feminist. I’d had some years that I’m not proud of where I both feared and loathed the label, I wanted equality, why did I need to be called a feminist? Weren’t most of them all angry and man hating (a common misconception). I’m not the first young woman to have felt that feminism wasn’t for them, and I wouldn’t have been the last BUT in the summer before my final year I read a lot (what else is new) and I found what I’d been looking for. I found other women who initially thought the label was too much but then realised there was so much BS in the world if you’re a female. So I wrote this blog and I hope that I’ll show that feminism and feminists aren’t as scary as people make them out to be. We just want equality and we don’t hate men (well no true feminist does).  Enjoy my archive post titled ‘I am a Feminist’, because now I’m so damn proud of that label. 

A lot of people may see the title of this post and think, so what? I’ve thought about writing this for a while and put it off for no reason other than I didn’t want to get this wrong. I am publicly declaring I am a feminist and anything I thought or wrote before is now over written. I’ve always been a feminist but I hadn’t always liked or used the word. I’ve been a feminist since I was a little girl where I’d shout GIRL POWER at everyone while wearing girl power temporary tattoos and would play armies at school and take charge. I’ve been a feminist since I got bored of barbie and used to sketch out my own dolls who could do anything and be anything. I’ve been a feminist since I was a passionate and angry teenager  determined that women could be and do anything and later as an excited 17 year old who saw a poster for the feminist society at university. Then something changed. I came to uni and got in an argument with a male feminist about how oppressed and angry I should feel. As a rule I hate being told what I should and shouldn’t do or feel, more people tried to fit me into a mold so I decided I didn’t want to be a feminist if that’s what people expected of me.

For a long time I, like a lot of young women, refused to call myself a feminist. I didn’t like the way the word had ugly connotations of man hating, being angry and not wanting to shave or wear a bra. I hate body hair on any human and I love a good bra (let’s face it, exercising without one is just damn painful). I’d say I was a humanist and other things like that, I got in arguments at uni and a lot of ‘feminists’ made me feel like I had to conform to their way of living and thinking. Fast forward to when I broke my spine and had a lot of spare time on my hands and something changed. I picked up a copy of How to be a Woman by Caitlin Moran for my Writing Women class and it spoke to me. I suddenly felt like I belonged and I could be a feminist and still be myself.

I read and continue to read every book on feminism and strong women that I could get my hands on. I got more interested in politics and women in an international context. I was happy talking about feminism and debating with others. I wanted to be part of a great group of men and women who wanted positivity and empowerment. I’ve said too many that I feel feminism is something you need to discover for yourself and not just tell people WELL YOU ARE, that just pisses people off. I found, fell in love and embraced feminism. I love women like Roxanne Gay too who question what it means to be a feminist in her book ‘Bad Feminist’, because I don’t think there is one true way of being a feminist.

I’m all for women going out and getting a career but I’m also totally supportive of stay at home Mums. My first female role models who I spent time looking up to were my Mum, my Aunt and my Nanna all three are incredible, powerful, kick ass women and all three were stay at home Mums. I also admire working women too, I’ve learnt a lot from my boyfriend’s Mum, who’s always worked. They’re all different and all deserve to be respected for different things.

I also feel that a woman can do what they like with their bodies. I’m not against glamour modelling or the porn industry. Don’t get me wrong there are issues and that’s a whole blog post right there, but if women WANT to do that to their bodies then who is anyone else to dictate to them? Because to me feminism is all about having a choice.

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image from Pinterest via Popsugar

 

I could go on and say all the things we need to fight and put right in the world gender stereotypes, rape, female education around the world, the children debate, etc. I could write about all the men on Twitter, when I posted about equality, who told me I was wrong that the pay gap was a myth and feminism wasn’t needed anymore. I could apologise for being young and naive when I said I wasn’t a feminist. Really though, I just want to say that I’m a big fan of feminism and other women. I don’t want to get angry and compete with them or knock them for every little thing. I certainly don’t want to stand up and go well women are better and men suck, I love men!

I’m writing this because I felt like it was the right time for me to say. I’ve been thinking about feminism instead of sleeping and looking up more books to add to my collection. I know there are some fantastic women out there who I’ve yet to meet and I also know there are people who will judge me first on being a woman before anything else, but you know what I’m excited. I’m excited that I’m a part of this community and that we live in a time where there are so many people working for equality and hopefully less hatred.

So there you go, I’m a feminist, how about you?

Feminist Friday: We Need To Talk About Rio

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This week the world has marveled at the Rio Olympics, where incredibly talented olympians compete to be the best in the world at their sport. After blood, sweat and tears winning bronze, silver, or the all important gold should earn the utmost respect, but alas there has been rampant sexism in the way in which the games have been reported, in respect to both female and male athletes. For an event that is viewed by the entire world, it’s alarming at the extent of the sexism we have been seeing.

Here are just some of the issues in reporting we’ve seen.

  • Women referred to as ‘girls’ and ‘girls teams’.
  • The chief of NBC’s Marketing delcaring that women watch the Olympics for the ‘reality tv’ aspect, not the sport.
  • Recurrent scrutiny of female athletes bodies, particularly in gymnastics.
  • When a woman wins, she’s described as competing ‘like a man’
  •  Female presenters having complaints put against them, not for their skills in presenting, but due to the length of their skirts.
  • Bronze medallist Corey Cogdell being described as the ‘Wife of a Bears’ Lineman’ instead of olympic athlete.
  • Recurrent focus on female athletes as mothers.
  • Cosmopolitan magazine’s ‘bulge’ articles, focusing only on the looks of men, rather than their ability.
  • Katinka Hossu’s world record being put down to the success of her husband who was deemed ‘responsible’ for her success.
  • The women’s judo final being compared to a cat fight.
  • Katie Ledecky and Simone Biles constantly being compared to male athletes.

I couldn’t write Feminist Friday’s without talking about such a major event and the issues surrounding it. The Olympics are celebrated throughout the world and yet, in mainstream media, women are still classified as being inferior to men. On the flip side the fact that women’s magazines are merely focusing on the size of a man’s bulge is not ok. Why are we focusing on these petty and superficial things instead of people’s talent? While some may think there’s aren’t big issues, it’s the way we consume media that makes them a big deal. Little girls will aspire to be like these olympians, do we want them to think that no matter how talented, they will always be compared to a man? Do we want little boys to be self conscious about how their bodies look and nothing else (because we know women are faced with this on a larger scale)? Let’s actually focus on the talent and the sport and not let these terrible and often talentless commentators and journalists take away from their glory with pathetic comments.

 

 

 

 

 

 

Introducing Feminist Fridays!

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Hello, hello, hello!

I’m writing today about something quite important. Now I know there will be people who look at the title of this post and think ‘oh god’ but wait! Give me a few lines. For the past few years I’ve been on my own personal search, the stage of your life where you want to know what you believe in. I’ve read countless books, looked at the world around me, at myself to decide if I am a feminist, what the word means (I’ll talk more about that later on). I wanted to start a weekly segment where I talk about feminism. I want to talk with you all about important issues, feminists to look up to and about our society today. I want to take away the misinformation, at least on my little corner of the internet. Most of all I’ll share my opinion and not step on another woman because of how she chooses to live, because that’s what feminism is about.

For this first post I thought I’d write a little about my life and feminism. Now, since I was a little girl I’ve always been adamant that I could do whatever the boys did. I would play with the boys at school, more than once I was the leader of the army through the woods. I used to draw dolls, because I felt Barbie was lacking, they were called Jenny Anything and they had so many different careers and I was 7 or 8 when I was drawing them. As I got older I still called out sexism, questioned things that I didn’t feel were right. Did I get in arguments with people? Of course I did!

When I was around 17, however, I started to lose my voice a bit. I started at college in a class of almost all boys (I was one of three females, which went down to two in my final year), which I think did have an impact on my idea of feminism. All of my friends were guys, I didn’t feel oppressed and I didn’t see it around me. The feminists I saw around me shouted a lot and talked about what I thought were stupid things like banning a song, I wasn’t like that. So when a boy slapped my bum, it was seen by a staff member and I was asked if I wanted to report it (which I did) I was pressured by the males in my class not to say anything because it was banter, could I not take a joke? Now I think about it am mad, but I was 18 years old and most of the time the only girl in the class and not always that popular for being a ‘nerd’ and a ‘swot’.

So when I got to uni I wasn’t sure about the whole feminist thing. I hadn’t seen a good example of feminism and looking back now I was naive so naive. I wasn’t looking at the bigger picture and I thought these girls were just huge killjoys. Who cares if women want to topless model, do porn or anything like that? Even today I still believe women can do what they like with their bodies and I’ll go into that in a different post. I didn’t see anyone who I could relate to and it’s something Emma Watson has spoken about (the first person I felt like I did relate to). Even in a university discussion I stated I was an equalist because I was fed up of women who thought they were superior to men. I believed the lies, I was young and impressionable and I believed the negativity. In fact now I’m embarrassed, but I truly feel that you need to find your own feminism, it can’t be forced on someone.

It wasn’t until I signed up for a Women’s Writing class and started reading the books that were assigned I started to realise something, there were people in here I could relate to. I realised that things I’d thought were ‘fine’ or me ‘fussing’ weren’t ok. That I can be a feminist and that this angry, hairy, bra burning feminist was something that was mostly made up. Yes there are some people I don’t agree with, but the world would be so boring if everyone thought the same. I realised that I am a feminist and that I may not have always wanted to use the word I’ve always wanted equality for women, I’ve always been passionate about men and women living together and being able to not have social pressures.

I am a feminist and I can’t wait to talk more with you.

 

 

 

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Book Review: Girl Up – Laura Bates

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They told you you need to be thin and beautiful. They told you to wear longer skirts, avoid going out late at night and move in groups – never accept drinks from a stranger, and wear shoes you can run in more easily than heels. They told you to wear just enough make-up to look presentable but not enough to be a slut; to dress to flatter your apple, pear, hourglass figure, but not to be too tarty. They warned you that if you try to be strong, or take control, you’ll be shrill, bossy, a ballbreaker. Of course it’s fine for the boys, but you should know your place. They told you ‘that’s not for girls’ – ‘take it as a compliment’ – ‘don’t rock the boat’ – ‘that’ll go straight to your hips’. They told you ‘beauty is on the inside’, but you knew they didn’t really mean it. Well I’m here to tell you something different.

It’s no secret that I think Laura Bates is a feminist icon. The creator of the Everyday Sexism Project, author and ted talk member has stood up and said enough is enough. It is because of her that I realised that a lot of the ‘banter’ I’d felt uncomfortable with and fought against for years, only to be told I was overreacting, was actually assault. It made me feel better that I wasn’t ‘just overreacting’. After reading Everyday Sexism last year I eagerly pre ordered Girl Up and I’m so glad I did. I felt that in comparison to Laura’s last book this is much more about her finding her own voice within her writing. Not only was it funny but also distinctive in tone as well as topic.

While you could argue that this is aimed more at teenagers in some parts of the book, it’s fine with me because I really learnt a lot from this book. It’s true that there are some chapters that seem to be geared towards teenage girls but if I’d have had this book to clutch in my hormonal hands as a spotty teen I think I would have stood up for myself more. I would have been more vocal about my body, about sexism and about the fact that I have a voice too, something that was repeatedly silenced. Authors like Laura are using humor and wit to bring embarrassing subjects into the spotlight and make it easier for them to talk about. At the same time as a 21 year old, while reading I felt like Laura was an older sister I never had. She doesn’t shy away from the fact that she didn’t always call herself a feminist, that she too shied away from inappropriate comments and behaviour at the fear of ‘kicking off’. 

I one hundred percent feel that books like this alongside, How to be a Woman, The Vagenda, Letters to my Fanny and more will help to create a stronger set of young women who can feel proud to not only be women, but to be themselves. Oh and before I forget there are also dancing vagina’s because who doesn’t want a page of dancing vagina’s. I’m going to stop saying that now, even though I can’t explain how brilliant it is. All I want to say is READ IT, READ IT, READ IT! Of course I gave this 5 stars (*****), absolutely brilliant, well written and inspirational. Go and give it a read NOW!

Remember to connect with me on Goodreads here to see what I’m reading!