Walking around Waterstones (my bank accounts worst enemy), I marvel at all the books and just feel happy and calm surrounded by all the literature around me. Well apart from 50 shades, but I pretend that doesn’t exist. I feel so amazed and confident, all these books have been written, I can write one too. Right? Right! Then I go home, get a blank word document up and stare at my screen for a good few hours.
When I’m not thinking about writing I get so many ideas it’s unreal, when I can I scribble them and wish I could just stop and continue writing. The times I set aside to actually write I’m stuck. I’m stuck in a frenzy of wanting perfection, wanting to know where I’m going with this. Two months ago I was lucky enough to be accepted to spend a week studying in Athens for Kingston University’s Creative Writing Summer School. I had the best time, met like minded people and got some great tips and feedback on the novel I was working on. I flew back to the UK and now I’m stuck again.
Some of the inspiration in Athens
Some writers compare writing a novel to a really long labour. Once it’s finished and you have the finished thing everything’s lovely and wonderful but while you’re trying to birth this magical piece of literature there is blood, sweat and tears and lots of them. Now as you know, I’ve never had a child (nor do I really want to at this point, I’ll stick to babysitting) but I can understand this thought process. Writing this book is on my mind 24/7, sometimes I feel like I eat, sleep and breath wanting to get it done. Ther problem is I have a huge enemy…myself.
Come on, hands up my fellow writers, who feeds their inner critic? Who’s let them get big and fat off of fears and negativity. Yes, I’m guilty of it as well. I, like many of you reading this, am a perfectionist. I give everything I care about 110% and that, in writing is not always a good thing. I stop myself sometimes from making progress because I’m so fixated on things not being quite right or some feedback that someone has given me. But I do have ideas! I really, really do. I have ideas that I’m working on about families, I have ideas for YA Literature and nonfiction too. I know it’s there I just need to unlock everything that’s there.
How about you all? I’d love to hear what you think and how you deal with the blocks! Leave me a message in the comments below!