How I really felt after getting engaged

Real Talk: How I Felt After Getting Engaged

Hello lovelies,

I’ve started going back to basics and just writing my thoughts and feeling when I feel them – could be a good idea, could be a nightmare, who knows? I’ve been thinking about whether I should talk about getting married on the blog. Then I realised that this is my little chunk of the internet where I write about my life…so it makes sense.

ANYWAY back to the matter at hand. As you probably know, I got engaged a few weeks ago (post about it here if you missed it) which is exciting. Of course I was bouncing off the walls about the engagement, then people started talking about the wedding. A lot. I just wanted to live in the excited bubble of getting engaged!

Within a few hours of getting engaged I was asked whether we had a date…nope. Overnight all of my Facebook and Instagram ads had changed to be wedding ads. People I hadn’t spoken to in years were getting in touch. I was being asked about venues, guest lists, planning. AHHHHHHHHH.

In the two days that Ali and I were the only people who knew about the ring and upcoming engagement it was blissful. While I was happy people were excited, I felt so overwhelmed so quickly. And no one was asking Ali these questions…so I found myself feeling anxious and not being interested in wedding stuff.

Instead of being excited I avoided talking about it, I got stressed by numbers and how damn expensive this shit was. It’s one day? How can one day cost so much money! I tried to reason with people surely that would be better spent to have a marriage than a party?

I think this is something people don’t talk about. I’m excited to marry Ali but the actual wedding? It’s overwhelming when so many people are interested and I feel like I have so much to do. Then after a few conversations and a few breathers I realised this is about us. This isn’t about anyone else.

So, I am going to be updating on this wedding thing and how we’re getting on and I need to bloody relax while doing it.

One of my best friends is getting married!!!

engaged shit

This weekend I got the amazing news that my best friend is going to be getting married!! Yes, my fellow long term relationship friend got proposed to this weekend. Amy and Peter are a truly brilliant couple and I have been doing nothing but smiling since I got the message and started screaming and laughing with excitement in the middle of Wimbledon station with Daniela…I’m pretty sure people thought we were having some kind of break down.

When your best friend gets engaged a lot of people tell you that you’ll have this wave of jealousy, this ‘why isn’t it me’ reaction but I can honestly say I haven’t. My smile has been as wide as it’s ever been and as soon as I could I went to buy an engagement card, started thinking of things I could get them as wedding gifts and any way that I could possibly help Amy.

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I can’t wait to celebrate with these two (sorry for pinching your picture Peter), who truly are meant for each other and have given childhood sweethearts another happy ending. Now let the celebrations, crazy planning and good times continue, I can’t wait to see them say ‘I do’.

Congratulations Amy and Peter!!!!

My Big Mouth: Is it that much of a big deal?

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Me and the Mr….well sort of 

Hey ho, we have gotten to this point in time! I’ve shared a flat with Ali for 3 months now and we haven’t killed each other, hurrah! For us, moving in together was just a logical step and a thing that we decided to do. Was I nervous? Yes. I’m fully aware I can be a total pain in the arse to live with and I was also aware that he is a grouch when he hasn’t slept. While it isn’t amazingly different for us after getting used to each other being around a lot of our friends are still intrigued that we live together.

My question is why is it such a big deal? We love each other, we used to spend nearly every weekend together so what’s the big fuss? We’ve been together long enough that we know we’re stable. I have so many cries from friends of ‘oh I don’t know how you do it! I could never live with my other half!’, other friends crack out the ‘when are you getting engaged?’ questions and want to know intricate details of of wedding which I haven’t thought that much about or planned…shock horror.

I’ve said time and time again on here that I’m happy where I am now. I genuinely am, we’re happy with each other just the way things are. I have a place at a great uni, a job I love and friends that mean the world to me, why would I spend time fantasising about my wedding? I can assure you it’s not because I’m work obsessed but I’ve just turned 20 years old and everyone is so keen to marry me off!

Moving in together, getting married they both seem like the things you do if you’re in love and when your in that place they are a big step but I don’t think the person living it get’s half as shocked than those around them. Would I say yes if he asked? Of course I would but I’d also be shocked as to why he was asking while we were still in uni. We can’t even afford a cat right now let alone a wedding!

So right now I’m happy that we’re both slightly mad 20 somethings enjoying uni, finding out what we want to do for work and just enjoying being us and loving each other, faults and all. So don’t count on wedding bells in the next year or two!