Feminist Fridays: You’re Not Guilty, Just Hungry

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In the last few days I’ve found myself using negative language in regards to food, when talking about eating a cupcake or getting take out with a friend I’ve been describing eating these things as ‘bad’ or ‘naughty’. I’ve been surrounded by other women talking about a ‘naughty’ slice of cake or hating themselves for not sticking only to fruit. I’ve also noticed that I hardly ever hear men speaking like this. I don’t hear men worrying about getting into a certain outfit for Christmas events.

I don’t know where this came from. Why there’s this idea of naughty food. Actually, that’s a lie, I know exactly where it came from. It came from diets, from women being told that to be beautiful they must look a certain way. Of course, if we’re having a little history lesson here, the concept of beauty changes throughout time. Look at the early 2000s when everyone who was anyone strived to get to a size 0, whereas a hundred years ago being that thin was seen as a sign of poverty, to be bigger was to be more desirable.

With Christmas just around the corner so many of us are denying ourselves the food we want to slip into a dress perhaps. I’ve been told by countless women they’ll buy clothes they know are too small in order to make them lose weight. Now, I’ll make it clear I’m not against anyone looking after themselves and being fit and healthy but I do wonder what impact this will have in the long term. How linking food to behaviour will impact not only us but those around us. By calling a piece of food good or bad will impact us mentally with these feelings of guilt that really don’t belong.

So I’ll say it and I want you to repeat it. I’m not guilty, just hungry. Life is short, while I know we all want to be our best selves eating a muffin while you’re out for coffee with your friends isn’t the end of the world. Buying a dress in your actual size and knowing you’ll be comfortable rather than struggling and feeling self-conscious if it doesn’t fit isn’t a terrible thing.  If you’re hungry, eat. Starving yourself and denying yourself won’t make you happy. You’re beautiful just the way you are.

Treat Yo’self

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I have a problem. Like many other people in this world sometimes I forget about someone that needs to be looked after and treated well, myself. To an extent I think most of us do this, we work ourselves to the point of exhaustion and yet if we saw a friend doing this we’d be the first one to tell them to take some time out, have a break, we might even treat them! I’ve learnt that we need to learn to treat ourselves! We need to learn to take a little me time, even if it’s something small, a nice bath, a take-away or just a cupcake on the way home. In this post I talk about some of the ways that I’ve treated myself in terms of things BUT treating your mind is also super important. Have a day where you leave your phone on silent and just do something you want to do. That might be sleep, it might be doing something creative, listening to music WHATEVER, just switch off. I have to admit, switching off is one of the things I am worst at. I always have to be doing something and talking to someone and checking my phone, sometimes I have major online FOMO. That’s something I’m working on, because if I do get to go into digital for work (and I really hope I do) I need to be able to literally and figuratively switch off!

So, as all of you who follow me on Twitter will know, yesterday I submitted all of the work for my degree. That’s right, I’m free! Duh duh daaaaah! It is one of the best feelings ever and after I submitted I wandered around town a little bit, determined to treat myself to something, I’d worked bloody hard and so wasn’t going to get anxious over spending a little bit of money (which is a big deal for me, I am obsessed with savings). There was nothing in town so I ended up having to order online, which it where I picked up 6 YA novels. I decided to give my brain a break from chunky books that I didn’t really like, that I had been forced to read and study for months. These were things I could read and enjoy, there was no weight on my shoulders to have a big opinion and defend it,  I just wanted to read for FUN, so I treated myself. Aren’t they pretty?

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Books, books, books! 

It may not be anything big or flashy or something to remember but it just perked me up, I feel like I’ve earnt the time to read what I like, have lie ins because I’ve stayed up too late reading and all that jazz. Soon I’m going to have a full time job, something I’ll have for the next 45 years, who knows if I’ll have this time to just do what I like whenever I like again? I’m hoping that I’ll become a writer and so part of work will be reading a load of novels and then writing my own, then I can treat myself again 😉

For everyone reading this I just wanted to recmind you that it’s ok to treat yourself in whatever way you can. You’re getting on with life, surviving and I know a lot of you are working damn hard so relax, treat yourself!

 

 

 

 

 

Treat Yo Self image from Pinterest.